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Original poster

Important Decisons: making *wrong* and *right* ones

15 replies

Fio2 · 17/05/2005 12:37

laughing at the good decisions and feeling bitter about the bad

how do you ever know what is right and what is wrong. How do you know if you let bad ones haunt you. Acting in haste and regretting it later.

How do you become a good decision maker?

Good and bad stories please

OP posts:
koalabear · 17/05/2005 13:09

i don't think anyone looks at all the options and then goes "that's the worse option - i take that one"

i think it is only in hindsight, when other facts come to light which may have been present at the time but not known to you, that we can see which option is the bad one and which one is the good one

so how do you become a good decision maker? i think by making sure you know as many of the facts as possible prior to making a decision, but even then, that wont necessarily make the decision successful - i think there is an element of "life" we just can't control

acnebride · 17/05/2005 13:43

I'm utterly hopeless at decisions. I think given that we have more choices these days than in the past, we have to make more decisions and not all of us are cut out for it. I just have to learn to allow other people input into my decisions, but not to allow them to bounce me into them.

But ultimately, the bad and good decisions I have made are mine and I'm OK with that. I guess I'm lucky that there haven't been any really obvious appalling results. apart from a broken marriage and a permanent overdraft of course!

My only real regret is deciding not to do A-level Biology, but then I really did hate the idea of dissecting little rats. And still do.

TwoAngels · 17/05/2005 13:47

fio I always always always make wrong desions I spend to much time focusing on regrets but then I'm a true beliver in things happening for a reason and think how all the stupid things I have done have led me here now finnally in the last two months or so since I have decided what I wanna do with my life everything just seems to be fitting into place and good things are happening. It's craaaaaazy

ninah · 17/05/2005 13:52

If only it was clear cut
There are always pluses and minuses on every side and you never get the chance to see what would've happened if you took the other fork in the road, so you just don't know. Therefore, eat drink and be merry, to your maximum ability, I reckon! I mean, not literally ...

TwoAngels · 17/05/2005 14:04

here here ninah

Original poster
Fio2 · 17/05/2005 16:22

yeseat drink and be mery, vey good idea maybe we should all just accept life is just shit sometimes whatever decision we may make

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 17/05/2005 16:25

you don't. as the saying goes, 'good judgement comes from experience and experience comes from bad judgement'. i let my conscience be my guide.

happymerryberries · 17/05/2005 16:44

Acnebride, you can go back and do biology there is no whole animal disection in the sylabus and all the organ disections that we do are of food grade samples. So the kidney and heart are from the butchers shop. Still a pronblm is you are a vehetarian/vegan I suppose.

Caligula · 17/05/2005 16:51

There's no formula. A friend of mine always tells the story about her friend's father, who was a Polish DP (displaced person) at the end of the second world war. He and his wife were given the choice of coming to the UK, America or Canada and they chose the USA, the land of opportunity. His son was called up in the sixties and killed in the Vietnam war. On his deathbed, in 1986, he said, "We should have gone to Toronto".

He'd spent the last twenty or so years of his life bitterly regretting the decision he'd made in 1946 or whenever it was. But how was he to know? That's life.

Original poster
Fio2 · 17/05/2005 17:12

how awful

OP posts:
ninah · 17/05/2005 17:14

Yes, and you can waste SO much time regretting -
bad things can still happen in Toronto. Poor chap, though.

nutcracker · 17/05/2005 17:38

I don't know, but I wish someone could tell me.

I have made lots of bad desicions over quite big things and I will always regret them. Trouble is though I can see myself making more.

sunchowder · 17/05/2005 17:43

Great Thread FIO! Somewhere between the heart, the gut and the head lie all the answers whether they are right or wrong or good or bad. Along with that making constant thinking corrections that focus on the positive aspects of any decision that you make also helps immensely!!

DickWhittingtonsCat · 17/05/2005 17:52

I am one always to draw up lists on paper of pros and cons, but ultimately to do what my intuition says. Afterwards I always think that I made a great decision, or that it was Destiny! A friend used to say that a much better approach was to stop making lists and just ask, "Does this action take me towards or away from where I want to go?" which I think is very powerful for dispelling silly doubts.

Donbean · 17/05/2005 17:59

Is it just me that makes a decision and feels comfortable and happy with it then.
I think long and hard about stuff and i cant think of any thing that i have done and later regret other than the usual "i wish i hadnt said that" but nothing major.
Im a firm believer in things happen for a reason and that you make your own way in this world so choose carefully the important stuff.

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