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Original poster

Don't people have any consideration?

49 replies

Rkayne · 22/04/2003 14:34

I posted a thread a couple of weeks ago (Just need to moan) about my cleaner repeatedly not turning up and getting angry when I said someting to her. Well I got loads of advice and support from all the mumsnetters and just wanted to post this follow up.

I thought we'd sorted everything out - she was always really friendly, never told me she was unhappy or anything. I honestly just thought she was having problems with her family adn that was the only reason she kept canceling on me. Well this morning, out of the blue, her HUSBAND phones up to say she's quit!!!!

I seriously don't understand what is wrong with people. She knows I'm 7 months pregnant and really need the help adn she didn't even have the courtesy to a)phone me herself adn b)give me even a little bit of notice to get someone else. I don't know, maybe I'm just too nice but I would never do that to someone.

OP posts:
leese · 22/04/2003 18:30

Sounds like you're well rid of her rkayne - but what a way to do it.....
Underhand, cowardly, pathetic, rude, inconsiderate - all spring to mind.
Wish you luck in finding a replacement - one who'll do a good job reliably!

joben · 22/04/2003 21:32

Has it not occurred to you that maybe she is having family problems and the fact that her husband rang to tell you she'd quit suggests you should be worried for her welfare! Maybe he was putting pressure on her to quit or something. I expect you live in quite a different world to your cleaner and worrying about how to keep a house clean is a luxury she can't afford. Maybe some sympathy wouldn't go amiss. I'm sorry you haven't got a cleaner but surely there are more serious things to worry about

helenmc · 22/04/2003 22:10

rkayne - no I think you've been considerate - you've tried to find out what the propblem was, but for what ever reason the cleaner chickend out of telling you herself. Don't blame yourself, and good luck in finding a new one...they are like gold dust

Clarinet60 · 22/04/2003 22:10

I would imagine that at 7 months pregnant, with, presumably, a job and another child to keep going, trying to keep her house running smoothly is something important to rkayne, and, indeed, to many of us. She is probably the only one in her household who takes responsibility for such matters. It's usually only people who never have to do any (ie, most men) who think cleaning is trivial.

Clarinet60 · 22/04/2003 22:15

In addition, at 7 months pregnant, rkayne ought to be treated with more consideration and support than usual, not less. The cleaner may well be going through something appalling, but I'm sure rkayne has been approachable enough to work for to have been told what it is.

SofiaAmes · 22/04/2003 22:19

rkayne, I had a similar problem when I was pregnant with my ds. The good news is that I got a much much better cleaner soon after who has been late only twice in 2 years (her husband ran off with another woman - a reasonably valid excuse). Just ask around your friends and neighbors. Where do you live by the way?

prufrock · 23/04/2003 20:57

I'm sure rkayne does live in a completely different world to her cleaner. One where people are considerate to others and show some sense of responsibility to their employers.
Have you thought of getting another cleaner through an agency rkayne? You pay a bit more, and the cleaner gets a bit less, but they are vetted for you so no worries about honesty, and if they don't turn up the agency will provide a relacement (not always same day of course) and will deal with any poblems you have.

Marina · 24/04/2003 09:44

rkayne, very sorry that after all your considerate agonising about how to treat your cleaner as well as possible while she wasn't doing her job properly, she has let you down this way. I can only assume it is guilt on her part - knowing she has left you in the lurch after you were a good employer to her - that has made her chicken out of telling you herself.
Good luck with finding another - Prufrock's idea of an agency is a good one.

edgarcat · 24/04/2003 10:11

Message withdrawn

mum2toby · 24/04/2003 10:19

Rkayne - You have been more than considerate to her!

To change the subject a wee bit... how much does a cleaner cost?? I've been thinking of getting someone in a couple of days a week to do ironing and hoovering/dusting... and maybe clean the bathroom/kitchen (8 hours maximum a week). I have absolutely NO idea what the going rate is!

I live on Central Scotland, if that makes a difference....

Batters · 24/04/2003 13:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mum2toby · 24/04/2003 13:25

Get a cleaner batters.... go on, go on, go on!

kaz33 · 24/04/2003 13:28

I love my cleaner - I come home and there is my flat clean and sparkling, ready for me to mess up again. Go on - do yourself a favour get a cleaner !!

I suggested to DP that as I am going off on maternity leave soon it was a bit of a luxury - he looked at me and with a big grin on his face said "I'd get rid of you before the cleaner" !!

mum2toby · 24/04/2003 13:29

Nobody gonna give me any ideas how much they cost??

kaz33 · 24/04/2003 13:31

Central london - £7/£8 an hour

bells2 · 24/04/2003 13:35

Definitely get a cleaner Batters even if its just for a few hours a week. We have a fab girl who does ours and charges £6 an hour. It makes all the difference in the world having the heavy duty stuff taken care of each week both in psychological and practical terms. I am prepared to give up an awful lot of luxuries when I give up work but not our cleaner.

Bozza · 24/04/2003 13:38

Batters I know where you are coming from as I work 3 days a week too and have agreeed that the days off are for DS although I do generally cook double meals (ie half to eat, half to freeze) on these days plus other chores. I also refuse to use my weekends for cleaning. So DH and I have always done the cleaning together on a Monday night. But I hate it. But I don't think the house would stay clean for a week. We generally also have a spruce up before the weekend.

I'm a bit unsure on this actually. How long should I expect it to take to clean a four bedroom house? Wouldn't expect ironing. Just clean the bathrooms, kitchen and polish/hoover/mop elsewhere.

mum2toby · 24/04/2003 13:38

Thanks Kaz33 and Bells2. I live in Central Scotland so £6 an hour is probably more what I'd be willing to pay. Oooo, I'll run it past dp tonight....

...He'll love the idea coz he does most of the house work anyway!

morocco · 24/04/2003 14:30

cleaners are great but can end up more expensive than you planned - I spent half today sobbing over my lovely angora cardigan which got wahsed and shrunk yesterday - found it hanging forlornly on the line looking like one of barbies accessories. My cleaner doesn't do the washing but every 6 months or so in a fit of enthusiasm she does and it always seems to end in tears. Last time I had to replace every single white item of clothing I owned as it had all gone pink

bells2 · 24/04/2003 14:36

Yes - ours is under instruction to stick solely to hoovering, cleaning bathrooms and floors etc. I am also nervous about letting her near bleach. Our only problem is that she seems to have a terrible weakness for chocolate and I have learnt to leave out a trail of Freddo's to keep her away from my Rococo truffles.

Lindy · 24/04/2003 15:02

Batters - definately get a cleaner - my mum treated me to a cleaner after DS was born (c/section) instead of a 'present' - it was brilliant, the best present ever, & despite being a SAHM - I kept her on for quite a long time (sorry, if I sound over-indulged) - only gave her up because she moved.

Bozza - our cleaner was fantastic (we did pay much more than the 'average' wage for our area) - she worked really hard & did our 4 bedroomed house in two hours - but I think that was quite exceptional.

Bugsy · 24/04/2003 15:12

Batters - get that cleaner. We have tapped into a Polish ring of cleaners and I have had 4 different girls/women in the last 3.5yrs. I pay £7 per hour (SW London) and they get 3 hours to hoover all the rooms in the house, clean kitchen floor, kitchen surfaces, entire bathroom, bit of dusting, bit of polishing and iron 4 shirts. We have a 3 bed house.
That £21 a week has made a big difference to my burden of domestic duties and I would definitely recommend a cleaner if you can afford it.

SueW · 24/04/2003 15:13

Ditto our cleaner and bleach and instructions to keep away from laundry.

Bigger problem with laundry is DH who every so often decides to help. Last Monday I was in tears, having found my brand new wool skirt which had been through the washer and a hot dryer and is now about a size 2! Aaaaaaargh. It wasn't even anywhere near the laundry basket.

Marina · 24/04/2003 15:19

Another vote for a cleaner. We are paying a bit over the odds from the sound of things but she is a family friend and utterly trustworthy. She will also cheerily babysit if we happen to be around, run errands, receive deliveries etc.
As she is only 21 she does not appear to have heard of bleach but we love her dearly and she does hoover and clean hard floors immaculately.

mum2toby · 24/04/2003 15:19

Men and washing machines! My dp does a lot of housework (more than me), but when he washes clothes he washes EVERYTHING!! Clean, dirty, black, white.... you name it! I've had to tell him to leave my stuff alone and just wash his own and ds's coz one morning I went to get dressed and realised he'd put ALL my work trousers into the washing machine and hadn't hung them to dry! I ended up having to wear jeans to work. hpmh! Bless....... he meant well!