What do you do with your toddlers?

[Newbarnsleygirlsinsaneknickers]

DD is nearly 18 months old and I'm feeling more and more guilty that she doesn't get to do very much.

I don't drive so I'm quite restricted to where I can go to start with. I take her to playgroup once a weekend if I miss it I feel awful.

After having a conversation with DH the other night he said he didn't think there was very much you could do with her at this age.

I would love to know what everyone else does with their toddlers that isn't in the home but not going to far IYKWIM.

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do you go to the park or the library?

We do have a pool and library but they're both in the town centre and I'm quite a way out.

To top it off DH has a fear of buses and is quite adament that dd musn't go on one.

I go swimming and do a gym class with my 21 month old. I have also done a singing/nursery rhyme class. I have also been to soft play places, gymnastics clubs (where I live they let toddlers in in the day and I got to bounce on a trampolene too). Otherwise its mother and toddler groups, the park, swings, council run play centres. Also have occasional days out to child friendly places like zoos, farms, science museums. Not sure whats near you though. I tend to scour notice boards, notices outside churchs, ask other mums, council web sites. In my local area theres an under fives group that produces good info about the area and teh NCT produce a booklet about our local area too. I alwys feel much better when we go out and do something but sometimes its takes a lot of effort!

So you don't drive and can't go on a bus. I don;t mean to be rude but I think your DH needs to get counselling or pay for taxis everywhere!

it's so hard isn't it? I had the same problem with my dd and like you I used to feel really guilty. I didn't drive until just recently so I know how hard it is to get out especially when the weather's bad. I actually met another mum through mumsnet and we go to the local soft play once a week which is great. I take her to the mums and tots group on another day which is only round the corner from me. Now the weather's nicer the park is always a good choice if you have one near and as someone else said, the library. I am also going to start going swimming with her but this was something I couldn't have done before I started driving. Other than that try to make days in as fun as poss with lots of puzzles, books (easier said than done, I know )

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I know, it's a nightmare. I am learning to drive so it won't be too long before I'm out and about hopefully.
He said when she's a bit older he won't mind, he just doesn't like the idea of her going on the bus in a pushchair.

a lot of buses are good now with wheelchair/pushchair areas. Also if you have a break on and your toddler strapped in it almost seems safer than just being loose on a seat!

hi
my ds is 17mths and I take him to 2 toddler groups in the week. We also go to park and I do activities with him at home. We can make cakes as he loves stirring the mix, painting and colouring and we also go to a soft play area. It is difficult to 'do' stuff with toddlers but its just trying to use a bit of imagination. ATM my ds fave thing is to build a den with the cushions from the couch..lol

Dou you have a garden? Sand and water play is great. My son was at the sink for hours yesterday, it was me who stopped it in the end as I was worried that it would completely flood

I've just had a look on our library's website and they have a few groups going so I'll try that out.

We did take dd swimming last week but dh was with me.

Yeah we have a garden. We're just sorting it out atm from winter and we're seperating it so that the dog has an area to go in.

What do you do with her indoors ? Do you....

Do finger painting ?
Colouring ?
Play Doh ?
Baking (nothing too complicated, just one of those boxes of mix and ask her to help you stir it all up and decorate the cakes with that squirty 'pen' type icing ?)

I think you need to bite the bullet and try the bus. I know your DH has issues with it but I think you need to sit him down and explain just how isolating being a non-driving SAHM is when buses are a no-no. It's very possible that if your DH has been a driver for a long time, he has forgotten just how awkward & restrictive not having a driving licence can be.

That's very true NDP. We've had countless arguments over it.

Next week he's working away in Wales for the week so I'm just going to do it I think. I can't bear the thought of staying in for a full week. I'll make myself ill!

We do drawing and reading books, we've also tried the baking thing (did a cake for MIL) and she quite enjoys the painting. It just can't do her any good staying in all the time.

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aww new barn she wont mind staying in cos she is with her mum an dbeing looked after. U r trying to do stuff with her and if u get garden sorted its amazing how much u feel like u have been 'out' we did ours last yr and are just sorting it out this weekend as we had to seperate dog bit etc..but its great

Yeah I think thats all it is. I had no idea he was against her going on one until after she was born.

It annoyed me slightly because he was quite happy for me to get on 4 trains a day when I was PG and working. I thought that was worse than her going on one now.

He would change his mind if he had to look after the toddler all day - he'd be on the bus to the library quick as a flash! My DH can be a bit over-protective and I just sigh, raise my eyes to heaven and ignore him!! I mean, protect your child - yes, but be reasonable about real life!

I wonder if theres some sort of comparison of safety of cars vs buses. I mean I know tons of people who have had car accidents or been run over including one fatality but I have never know anyone who has been in a bus crash.

That was my point. I don't know anyone who has been in a bus crash and neither had dh.
He did say what would happen if the driver slammed on the brakes, where would the pushchair go.

I've decided I will talk to him tonight about it. It's upsetting me now because I think dd is missing out because of it and I can't do with that.

DD is having her nap but when she wakes up we're going to do some painting I think.

NBG - I feel the same which ds who is nearly 1! I feel we don't do nearly enough, plus because I don't drive I feel guilty I can't take him more places.

Today we have done crayoning, (more me pulling them out of his mouth!) painting (which he LOVED) had a bath and gone to the park... for the rest of the day he's gone round MILs as we need to sort the house out. I feel so much happier when we have a full day.

Hi, I'm on no 3 and I know how you feel, with dd I felt I had to do lots with her, take her out, visit lots of groups, now with ds2 we go to toddler group once week, and he tags along with me, helping to cook, clean, garden, collect shopping etc, we chat constantly and I honestly think he is the happiest of my 3.
We tend to walk everywhere, but I have taken him on buses, I'm afraid I agree with your dh they make me nervous as well.Go for the library though they can be quite social places if you go on a regular basis, unfortunately we don't live near one anymore.

Have you got a bike you can put a child seat on back of. we have loads of cycle paths where i live and i used to go everywhere with my kids on the back of my bike when they were little, it means you can get further in half the time. Try out as many different mother and toddler groups as poss and you will find other mums in the same situation as you and maybe be able to meet up with them occasionally at each others houses, it worked for me.