Please help me make a decision about my life!

[Tanzie]

My contract in my current job is due up next year. I have the possibility to ask for it to be renewed for a year (they don't have to say yes) and don't know what to do.

On the plus side, I love living here, have great house, good school for children, reasonable salary (much better than would be in UK). Loads of fun things to do with kids at weekends and excellent social life. Children love it here and are very settled.

On the downside, I don't like my job. I was turned down for promotion about two months ago and have been feeling really depressed and demotivated since then. I work long hours (9.30-7.00 or later) and this is unlikely to improve. DH is quite keen to go back to UK, but I'm not so bothered as have barely spent any time there since I was 21.

There's the possibility of another job coming up at the same grade, which would mean another 3 year contract, but I am not sure that I would like the work (it's budgeting, which I don't enjoy). I've applied for a couple of other jobs here, but haven't even been offered an interview, which has also depressed me.

I have to make up my mind quite quickly (prob next week) on the extra year and am being totally wet about the whole thing.

God, what a drip I sound!!

You might not like the work in the other job but would the boss be better? ( you work for a witch don't you IIRC?) Could you apply for that and a new contract and see what you're offered? At the same time you could look in the uk to establish what the options would be. Sorry, you're not a drip but tihs is a very wet reply!

where are you?

would it be financially disastrous if you were unemployed for a few months?

if not, I say GET OUT OF THAT JOB.

for 9.5 hours a day, you should at least kind of like it.

The other job (if I got it) would give me more autonomy, which I would like. I just feel I have outgrown this job, being asked every five minutes, have you done X yet? In my last job I ran two offices with 7 staff in 2 countries, recruited staff, oversaw the projects, did the budgets. In this job, I feel like I am being treated like a school leaver. When the witch goes on holiday, I really enjoy it - the extra work, responsibility etc (and funnily enough I manage to fit it all into my usual hours).

Anyone else?

Not much help because I know nothing about any of this stuff, but I would always say never stay in a job which you don't like. Life is just too short.

pointless agreeing to another year in a job you hate just because you're afraid you might not get one of the others you have your eye on.
You'll feel even less motivated and hate yourself for being a wimp. (Not me calling you a wimp by the way!)

Saying stuff it to the job and the boss you hate will empower you I bet!

Sounds like you hate your job. Do you have to work? If yes then I'd go for the extra year just because it can be easier to get another job if you already are in a job. If you don't have to work or could take a break could you use the time to do a course etc that could help you get the jobs that you have been applying for? - just to give you the edge over the others. What could be hard to explain would be the gap between job & new job if you just left without asking for contract to be renewed. Good luck with this.

I second milward's advice about getting a job while still having one. That said, I downsized considerabley a few years ago and it has been wonderful to not deal with all of the stress of my former position. It did take a while to get used to a lesser salary, and of course, there's always the chance that you wouldn't necessarily drop in salary. I just say that because of your comment about moving back to the UK. It sounds like you are working awfully long hours. How old are your kids? Is it worth the trade-off in the missed time with them?

I might be stalking you but in my head you are in Belg.

I would stay if its Belgium, I loved it there.

But if you hate your job, maybe another one would be better even it means moving back.

Smurfgirl - yes I am and I do love it here. I think I will go for the extension AND apply for the other job that comes up next year. That way, if I don't get the other job, I can have another year here to look round for something else. DH has now said quite happy to stay here (think it has only just occurred to him that he is only 2 1/2 hours from London on Eurostar)