HELP! People who have moved to the country from London I need your advice (long, sorry)...

[CountessDracula]

Am having a mare

We live in London currently in a lovely house in v nice area (which we are just finishing doing up) with lots of friends, great primary schools, dd just settled in brilliant nursery, easy journey to work etc...

AND NOW....dh has been offered an excellent job in Winchester. I grew up there and am tbh not overly keen on going back, though if I look at it objectively I can see the benefits (near parents, bigger house with garden 10 x size of current one, no planes, traffic etc, dh will have much chiller lifestyle, we will get to do country things (whatever those are, stumbling around in shite IME))

BUT... I love living in London. I have lived here for 20 years, I love it. When I go to the country I go bonkers. Everything is so slow and annoying. The shops are crap. The food is awful and even nice restaurants give you bloody baby corn and mange tout with everything. Culture is non-existant (I love theatre, opera, gigs etc and go a lot). I will miss all my friends. Plus I will have to commute 4 days a week and it would add at least 40 mins each way onto my journey, but not sure I would really mind that as could sleep in the morning and work in the evening (or drink v&t lol!) I would still see dd in the evenings.

My question is, once I am there, would I chill out and stop being such an arsehole about all this or am I doomed to a life of dissatisfaction and woe? I don't want to go if so!

Other downsides - the schools are nowhere near as good, would have to pay for private in all probablility. There is nothing to do as a teenager but get pissed and take drugs. There is NO WAITROSE (ok that is my main problem I admit )

I really really want to do this for dh. He reckons he has no prospects in London. This firm tried to get him twice already and he turned them down (about 3 years ago). They are, for them, offering him the earth. He will take a paycut but will have much better prospects and life. I want to make him happy but I don't want to make myself miserable in the process.

WHAT DO I DO?

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Used to live in Winchester and my parents are still there, so still go and visit a lot. (Left in 1982 when I went to university). Now live in SW London. TBH, would rather stick pins in my eyes than go back. Considered it for about a nanosecond about 8 years ago - seriously think DH (London born and bred) would have died.

On the plus side, I think the state schools are not bad. (I went to a couple and I think they have got better since) Also....no, can't think of anything else in its favour.

I think there is a horrible binge-drinking thing at weekends there now (or maybe the Hampshire Chronicle - my favourite newspaper in the world - was trying to spice things up). Certainly when I was growing up there were loads more drugs around than I have come across since. Frankly I think DS and DD can take their chances in London.

ks - horses lol - the hearty ones are the worst

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there's plenty of them down here believe me

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I have a friend who as born and bred in London (Camden), went to Southampton Uni and never went back. She's living in rural splendour in the New Forest.

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she lives in a village near Ringwood.

I do get all wistful when I go back to London. Also there is more to do with kids - fab playgrounds, cafes, hands-on museums etc. Down here its mud, wellies, ponies and parties. That is it. Kids love it, I tolerate it.

more snobby in the country than London too.

Also few opportunities to have an interesting job (thank god I found one, took five years though).

Pros: bigger house and garden (although thats hard in Dorset nowadays its so expensive)
Good friends with funny sense of humour that see the crappy side of the country
Good schools (for us)
fresh air and lovely views
Good local produce

have to say that I don't miss living in London - it took as long to commute to work from Twickenham as it does from MK.

We rarely used the car as there was no-where to park in town - upside of that was we went out drinking after work and didn't have to drive.

Richmond Park and the river Thames are no substitute for the wide open spaces available in MK. Traffic here is a dream - I can be in John Lewis in 7 minutes or Woburn Woods in 5

Best of all mu asthma which developed when I was living in London has virtually gone.

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Can there be some clarification as to what you all mean by country, as at the moment this thread seems to define country as not London...

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tell them to piss off - lol

country for us is very rural Dorset

Cod - I'm sure I only put it like that because you mentioned it first

I love cafes

Thank you

dont really count Winchester as the country

we have loads of cafes in MK - Starbucks, Costa, Pret a Manger - John Lewis - did I mention John Lewis

and we have a snowdome - how many of them in London eh?

I'd be looking to hold on to the London property for as long as poss.

We moved out of London for a couple of years, but rented the house out. We came back because dh missed London too much (to be fair, his line of work needs him to be here really).

The prices in London rocketed in that time and we were v glad we held on to the house, although renting it out was far from hassle free.

We'll never move back while dh is working but I fantasise about being a rich old lady and moving into one of those nice mansion flats near Harrods , or Paris, I fantasise about moving there too when I am old.