how do you balance full time job + housework + toddler???

[Nickinha]

Has anyone got good advice on how to hold down a full time job, cook supper, do the washing, keep the house clean and entertain a clingy todler?? My house just always seems to be disgusting!

i can see that, hmc, just disputing the notion that there is only laundry to do when you work f/t! only laundry indeed, it is the bane of my life!

must go and have that shower now! does anyone else really hate bathing/showering in the evening? i much prefer the mornings...

Would'nt it be wonderful to be a top celeb; only wear something once, and have someone cleaning up behind you as you go along happily devastating everything in sight... Oh my God!!!!! My kids are famous!!!!!!!!

You have a point there Serenequeen, laundry is a full time job in itself

This does not bode well for me. Baby not due to Oct-05 but housework already a shambles. Beginning to think that any day now I'm going to have a visit from Kim and Aggie.

Okay not that bad - but gotta get DH to understand how the iron works.

I have got a cleaner, but when I didn't I always used to get the kids to help me from they were very young. I used to clean the floors on all fours with DS1 riding on my back. It takes longer of course.
I always cook with my children and they love it. Even very small children can help in the kitchen.
If I couldn't afford a cleaner, I would just do a little bit of tidying up during the week, and share the cleaning with my DH at weekends. Don't worry too much about your house being a bit messy during the week!

Hi Nick, did you tech you DH to cook, iron, and clean yet? HAve you considered a washing up strike?

How does your house get so messy if noone is in it all day?

Not being flippant btw, just wondering!!

Ah, handlemecarefully at 10.42pm last night - kind of answers my question!! I'm with you on that one too hmc. I work freelance but sometimes go in to a client office for a meeting and even though it's only half a day or a day, I miss the kids like mad - I hate it.

But being here all day - boy does it get messy and dirty!

Do little and often, throw out junk, and plenty of storage boxes.

My typical day consists of
Get up 5:30 walk and feed dog. ironing
Drop toddler off at CM at 7:30.
FT job in city.
Come home and get DP to cook dinner while I put on a load of washing,
quick polish.
Wash up after dinner.
Bath toddler and bed
go downstairs...clean fishtank, wash floors and hoover.Walk dog
1 hour of study for OU
Bed by 10:30

Also do little bits like always put bleach down toilet b4 bedtime to save time.

That way weekends are free to do big jobs like gardening and cleaning bathrooms and ovens etc.

Of course Im not saying it always works like that but I have got very good at throwing away stuff that i dont really need and have lots of toy boxes and I always make cleaning up toys before bed part of playtime with toddler. Also learned to delegate to DP.

Hi Nickinha, I really agree with those who say that long-term this isn't sustainable - you will just become more and more angry that he is using you like this.

If your daughters are 13 and 16 I would get them to cook once a week - either together or seperately if they prefer.

I would also do alternate nights cooking with your DH - does it matter if you eat later?

Whoever cooks in our house doesn't wash up - that's the rule!

Nickinha, you're probably too exhausted for any "bedtime activities" anyway, given what you have on your plate, but would cessation of said "bedtime activities" (on the v reasonable grounds that you are too exhausted) concentrate your dh's mind a little about your need for more support?

On a slightly more serious note - it sounds as though a lot of cash is going in to home improvements.

We have a lot to do on our house - still bare concrete floors in downstairs loo and utility room, no carpet on stairs etc after 3 years here, revolting 1970's avocado bathroom suite still in situ etc etc. It will all have to wait until I go back to work when my children are a bit older and we have more money coming in.

A lot of house improvements can wait. Are you both strongly committed to getting them done quickly?

It sound like you are under a lot of pressure - something's gotta give and it should not be your health!