Why are some people just horrible on here? I could cry for some posters.

[Moier]

Some people on here are just horrible .
Some don't read the whole post .
Some get on their high prevlidge horses.
Loads are jealous and show it in an adverse way.
Some just like being antagonistic for the sake of it.
The poor OP asking for advice about having her kitchen done.. and struggling within her family both mentally and physically.. she is NOT getting it for free... she pays rent. Those who own their homes.. you choose to.

Every day on here people asking for advice .. their minds probably in turmoil.. they don't know where to turn.. they are desperate.. loads and loads fantastic great positive advice.. but for every post there is at least one replay that is downright nasty and bitchy.
Please think before you type.
I know one person's reply on here to someone last year.. tipped her over the edge.
#bekind

In a similarish vein, I’ve noticed there’s a real culture here of belittling anything other posters are pleased with or proud of. For example if a poster says they went to dinner with their OH at Bella Italia you’ll inevitably get some snide poster popping up to say ‘Bella Italia? I would dump him for that’. They think they sound really cutting and like they have high standards. But they actually just sound jealous, unhappy and a bit desperate to be seen as ‘cool’.

It shocks me how awful people are and I think most decent sized posts will usually have their fair share of horrible posters. People going out of their way to pick and be unkind to someone asking for help is confusing to me. It makes me hope they're intentional trolls and all the vileness is down to a hand-full of people.

The only positive for me it makes me think more about what I write on forums or groups so as not to be unkind.

So secondhand information?

It started as

"I know one person's reply on here to someone last year.. tipped her over the edge."

And then

"More than one comment"

And now

"I didn't know her personally.. l was told by a reliable source."

So you're not really sure about what you're accusing MNetters of here with regards to this woman, are you?

Maybe it was the straw that broke the camels back? I had a comment on Friday that on any other day or time would not have bothered me, but Friday, it tipped me over the edge.

Turns out it wasn't.

@NNaptrappedmummy
I absolutely love your post.
I really did LOL.. so much my cat sat up from his nap .. looked at me as if to say shut up.. then went back to his nap.

There is always going to be very opinionated people..
But we can't all be same or we would be bah-ing .. and that's why they make chocolate and vanilla.

But l do feel for some posters who get bashed.

I always assume those are miserable people with miserable lives who try to make themselves feel better by finding someone to kick down/feel superior about.

People like that simply need to be ignored...

I completely ignore nasty responses as I just don't care, plus I have the privilege of not having to live in their unhappy heads.

Sorry to hear that, hope you're OK.

This is a good approach.

I think there is a big difference between a robust response (blunt, honest, but given with the intent to ultimately help the OP) and a nasty one (blunt, often not especially truthful, given with the intent to hurt).

I agree, OP - I see more and more of the latter lately (and less of the former).

I agree in part.
I've been accused of acting superior by some posters in the past, when merely saying something isn't for me (and not in a rude way). Some people use the acting superior line when there was no acting superior.
(Hope that makes sense).

Agreed. I've stopped creating my own threads now. The responses were awful and upsetting. Made a difficult situation worse.

I roll my eyes at how black and white some people can be. Incapable of seeing shades of grey and thinking they’re morally superior as a result.

@AAlwaystired23

Yes the straw that broke the camels back.
It was few years ago.
Long back story.
Reliable source my friend then worked in the Psychiatric hospital.
No names mentioned but discussing my time in the same hospital...

Still some people being antagonistic on this thread even .
I'm not the Psychiatrist.
I'm not the NHS trust.
I'm not the person.
I'm can't be held responsible for other people's opinions or actions.

@MaMabelface
Well said.. great opinion to have.👍🌷

I absolutely agree OP. I always find in threads (including by my own) a few normal / nice / helpful replies then BOOM a Mumsnet Witch arrives.
I always picture them as deeply unhappy people who can finally project that misery anonymously and take great pleasure in being mean. It's horrid. But all part of a forum such as this unfortunately, I'm sorry to hear your Friend was so deeply affected by comments

There is an element of truth in that we cannot be held accountable for other's actions though, which makes it not black or white regarding being antagonistic.

Quite.
I guess we can all be guilty of this at times but it's good to be open to other perspectives.

Bella Italia is pretty naff though.

<completely misses point of thread>

I completely agree OP. People are awful on here and it’s so sad.

I can understand why some people were annoyed with the kitchen thread.

Millions are in unsecured rentals, with myriads of problems. Complaining about a 2 week interruption for a new free kitchen on a secured rent which is lower than private is going to rile some people.

I don't think that is necessarily a problem. Realising that actually you are fortunate can be very beneficial to the poster.

I agree - people will attack on almost every single thread.

I still find mumsnet quite useful though -you just have to ignore the nasty replies.

I always get useful advice on here on every single topic.

I guess that's one of those 'think it but don't say it' situations.....

<understands your comment was a joke>

Yes I agree.

Or when they fixate on something not relevant to the point of the post and just go on and on and on about it, picking holes in the OP's posts or just being mean. It's like they just get obsessed and forget there is actually a real person on the other end of the computer screen.

Like the poster who wrote about her constantly crying baby last week (or the week before?) and a couple of people just kept going on at her to take her baby and toddler swimming at 6.30 at night in January?!!! And then telling her she wasn't willing to try anything to help because she wouldn't do it. Just bizarre and not helping her at all.