I'm so sorry...

[Tilllly]

A guy walks into a restaurant and wants to eat squid. He calls the waiter over, whose name is Gervaise, and says
'I want that squid there', pointing at a little green squid with a hairy moustache on its top lip.

Gervaise says, 'but that's my favourite, I don't want to kill it, it's so mild and friendly'. But the customer is insistent, so Gervaise goes over to the tank, pulls out the squid and lays it on the worktop. He raises
a knife and is about to chop it up, but he can't. Gervaise goes back to the customer, and says he can't kill it, but the customer still insists that he wants to eat it.

Gervaise has an idea, and says 'OK, I'll go and get Hans, our dishwasher, he's a tough guy, he'll be able to kill it'. He goes and gets Hans, and Hans takes the knife and is about to chop the squid up, when it looks up.

Hans sees its mild little face and its hairy lip and he can't kill it either, so they both go and tell the customer that they're really sorry but he can't eat it.

The moral of the story?

Hans that does dishes is as soft as Gervaise, with mild green hairy lip squid.

Very good! I have one along the same lines...

A frog walks into a bank. He strolls up to the clerk, whose name badge announces her to be Miss Patricia Wack, and says 'I need to borrow £1000, right away'. '£1000!' says the clerk, 'that's a lot of money to lend to a frog! Don't you have anything to offer as security?' The frog thinks a moment then pulls out a ceramic white elephant. The clerk says 'We can't accept that as security for £1000, what even is that?' The frog shouts backs, 'I can't believe this treatment! Don't you know who I am? I'm Kermit Jagger!'

The manager rushes over to sooth the situation and tells the clerk: 'It's a knick knack Patty Wack, give the frog a loan. His old man's a rolling stone'.

Thanks. This is the most interesting thing I’ve read here