Are taking drugs and being a good parent mutually exclusive then?

[wanderlust]

I don't want to get told off lots or start a fight, its just that I (along with most of my friends - parents or not) will take drugs every now and then, but I am aware that the people I know are not necessarily representative of what's really normal or acceptable - so what does everyone really think?

Og God, Vacua, I agree.

I have heard some barefaced lies from pepole along that line (ha ha) before. Why not be honest?

I also find it a bit sad tbh when peole in thier 40s still feel they have to take drugs to be "cool" m,ost of us grow out of it way before then.

yay we agree on something!

made self feel a bit sick typing that actually . . . the eyeball bit, not the we are in agreement bit

I think my main concern would be how do you handle emergencies? If you need to go to a doctor, A&E etc. do you think you might be capable of handling such a situation while high and also if it comes out and people start to question you capabilities to take care of children, what weighs more? taking recreational drugs and possibly loosing your children or abstaining until they are old enough to leave home?

lol vacua!!!!!

i heard that people in yorkshire are now injecting exstacy in their mouths...

...it's called e by gum.

I don't think I've ever been totally incapacitated when in sole charge of my children, I did have to drive to A&E at 116mph this new year's eve tho when I'd had a few drinks more than one would usually drive after, and my daughter stopped breathing and we couldn't find a pulse. Would you wait for an ambulance to find you in a remote rural location or just get there as quickly as possible? I'd probably be an even better driver with a few class As coursing through my system . . .

I agree with being honest to your children too btw.
If/when they ask, I will tell them I have taken drugs. DD already knows that ehr dad takes drugs but then that was after having to explain why he was in the state he turned up at my door in once.

Christ, my ds has plastic toys, watches tv, eats meat and sometimes...>>>shuffles nervously

I grew up thinking drugs were the devils own spawn, but had an alcoholic mother who most of the time was incapable but would rant about the evils of drugs.
Now I am an adult and have had a chance to try them all, I feel certain that moderate use of anything is ok, but the fact that heavy duty alcohol is everywhere and it seems acceptable to get wasted regularly is just madness.
For those who have tried all the options, make a direct compaprison about how you feel having had a couple of lines of coke, verses a splif verses half a bottle of wine, for me, alcohol is absolutly the worse.
I am also glad to know the effects so that if my DS comes home one day having tried x, at least I will have some understanding of what is going on, rather than a hysterical rant over something which may not be too bad.
As for the legality issue, I think it is dreadful that legally at anytime you can go out and get utterly hammered on something over the counter!

Can anyone remember that song where the chorus is 'don't drink, don't smoke, what do you do?' Sounds a bit like adam ant but don't think it is.

I think it is Adam Ant-goody two shoes.

adam ant - goody two shoes

the stuff about risks is an interesting point.
People have mentioned risk of heart attack if using cocaine. But this is only as common as risk of heart attack from being obese. And there are sooo many people serious injured or killed taking daft risks when blind drunk.

I haven't used drugs since I was young enough and thin enough to carry it off well, and now have a fairly anti-drug stance. But I feel that if your children are away for the night, and someone else is on emergency duty, then a line/toke/e does not atuomatically make you an unfit parent.

The point about risks though BarryScott, is one line/e/hit etc can kill you.
(I'm not including weed in my stance, I think that is able to be used safely as is alcohol when used in moderation and sensibly)

I don't think it makes you an unfit parent but have seen more people in A&E with heart problems from coke than MI from being obese. We all take risks as part of our lives - eg crossing the road. You would still look both ways though. Not sure if this is a risk worth taking. (drugs, not crossing the road)

I found this interesting "you will not die from a glass of wine. You may die from a line of coke." the reality is you won't die from either - a single glass or line. but in greater quantities both are incredibly harmful. liver sclerosis anyone? and as for the violence connection alcohol is the worst - a huge proportion of violent incidents are alcohol-related. being legal has not exempted alcohol from having a huge number of innocent victims.

I do get your point, Victorian Squalor, but unless someone has some better eveidence, I understand it's a small risk. I work in mental health. Lots of my clients use drugs, and one off deaths are so so rare.

I know this still makes drug taking the equivalent of playing with a loaded gun, but is it not then similar to one-off deaths from extreme sports/driving fast cars/being in a very risky profession like my poor old DH?

I frequently howl at my dishwasher as it happens. When it insists on leaving a nasty sticky mess in the bottom of the mugs and on glasses.

ormirian, prolly need more salt in your dw...

Message withdrawn

hatwoman, you may die from one line of coke, how the heck do you know what is in it????

I think a lot of this depends on what you classify as a 'good' or a 'bad' parent, tbh.

That's true subaroo.