What your children will be when they grow up - will you emphasise money or enjoyment ? Or will you hope they find something that coincidentally provides both?

[WideWebWitch]

Do you or will you encourage your children to do something they love for a living even if you know it won't pay well or will you steer them in the direction of more cash?

As we all know that you don't get paid in accordance with how clever you are or how valuable the work is (well, I would argue so since midwives aren't paid royally and some people make vast sums as footballers or glamour models) will you steer your children away from jobs that don't pay well or will you consider it unimportant and want them to carry on and be an artist if that's what they want? Or are you so rich that it won't matter because they'll be trustafarians?

I know there are exceptions, not all artists are struggling financially and plenty of people aren't well off but are happy but interested to know what you think.

I want them to be happy ( but in a job that enables me to retire at 50 )

DS is 15, and we are definitely encouraging lucrative careers, eg engineering.

hmmmm but what is lucrative these days eh???? In this country science and engineering pay nothing compared to what plumbers and bricklayers get - thats why a lot of the poeple I know who came out of University with excellent degrees are now plumbers and plasterers (helps pay of the student loan)

I provide them with as much information as possible about the likely income v satisfaction values of careers and think it's up to them to decide. Of course it doesn't have to be either/or, lots of well paid jobs are inherently satisfying if they suit your abilities and temperament.

Enjoyment, I reckon. Although I would be overjoyed myself if they raked in enough to support their aged parents in unaccustomed plutocracy.

Seriously, though, life's too short to waste doing something you don't like. And if you like something in any case there's a reasonable chance you'll make a decent fist of it and earn a reasonable amount, I reckon. Speaking as a journalist.

Oh, find a passion ideally, definitely.

But they do have to be realistic about their potential to own a home, have holidays, enjoy a certain lifestyle. My 17 yo is really keen on the idea of working in some sort of social care setting but does this mean I'll have to support her indefinitely or will she just get on with being poor?

Unless you expect them to reach 'dizzy heights', ban them from entering into any public sector job.

I want them to be happy and fulfilled first but I don't think that you can be trully happy if you are worrying if you can afford to live so money has to be a consideration. Hopefully I will be able to steer them towards getting a good education and then they will have more freedom to go with the money or the satisfaction or somewhere in between.

DS2 wants to be a zoo keeper - I find myself disappointed for him because he will never be well paid. However, it is a job you do for the love of it so he should do it if it makes him happy.

What I would really love him to do is be a doctor - well paid and worthy. He is only 4 though so perhaps I shouldn't worry yet.

I don't think money will come into it for me. I will mainly emphasise happiness but there is something more than that. I would discourage some jobs even if they seem to make DD happy (e.g. glamour modelling or any modelling). I would not want DD to work in a corrupt industry where people are likely to exploit her, even if it initially makes her happy.

I guess I will emphasise job satisfaction, using her mind and feeling good about herself at the end of the day. I will be particularly happy if she happens to find money and satisfaction by choosing to be a Hedge-Fund-Manager-for-the-world's-first ethical-hedge-fund-which-brings-direct-benefits-to-the-third-world!

If my boys wanted to be binmen, as long as they were happy (and not up to their eyeballs in debt) I wouldn't care.

Theres nothing worse then being stuck in a job you hate IME.

I want them to be happy and healthy and safe and as independent as possible. I'd also like them to find love. Nothing else.

Interesting question!

The problem is that even if you are good at/passionate about a certain subject it often means that you are unable/unqualified to do anything else no matter how hard you try.

And many of us are just mediocre tbh and end up having our 'passion' as a hobby or an interest outside of paid work.

Well, I agree that most people will have to compromise their passion with earning a living, and even more people don't even know what their passion is. Really, would advise not to do jobs you hate.

For DS, doing engineering, we are talking a starting salary of £30k+, without having to dodge the tax man.

First priority is to get the best education/qualifications possible, thereby widening prospects for future choices, whatever they may be. (I say that as the mother of three lads of varying ability.)

I would want them to do a job they enjoy, but if need be they take a job, any job they can get, and then work towards their chosen goal.

Public sector pay is quite good locally (shows how poor the local wages are) - not that I'd encourage anyone to go into the public sector - both myself and DH work within the CJS.

Tinker, I totally agree with your point that many people don't know what their passion is let alone even have one.

My FIL is always going on at dh re this. Yes I'm sure my FIL is passionate about accountancy

I would like them to have enough qualification so that they can make choices about their future jobs. Dh and I have both chosen jobs that we love. while we are both reasonably well paid, we could have gone into other jobs that would have paid us both a lot more.

Enjoyment is very important, but grinding poverty sucks. Moderation in all things is my usual option.

I think both are important. You just don't get that many jobs that lots of people really love.

I hope my children grow up to be happy and fulfilled, not just in their work, but in as many areas of their lives as possible. However, a bit of spare cash does oil life's wheels. Being reasonably secure is not to be sniffed at, so I'd like them to be at least aware of their chosen profession's likely financial rewards compared to the cost of living.

Alternatively I'll try a bit of matchmaking with privately wealthy eligible types

I was always told to go for enjoyment, but sadly, life has proven to me that everything I enjoy working at seems to bring in paltry amounts of money.

Not that I would force ds to get on an accountancy course out of university, but I reckon there is something to be said for sticking at a reasonably unexciting career, for the rewards later on.
The people I know who are financially comfortable now have pretty interesting jobs, even if they started out doing things I would balk at. They have a lot more free time and, barring criminal activities or a revolution, seem to be well-set for life.

It also takes time for some people to find out what they like and don't like, I speak as one who is on her third career path by mid-thirties - if you train as a lawyer for example you don't have to be one until you die, and you can take a drop in income if you are lucky enough to find something that pays off in other ways. The concept of a job for life is dead I think, and even such tightly vocational paths as law or medicine needn't bind you to that profession forever.

Definite happiness in this house

They are the ones who will be doing the career, my feelings shouldn't come into the equation

Much better to encourage enjoying school, studying the subjects they can do well in, so they can leave school with choices

Also, to teach them to live within their means so that no matter what they earn they can manage (no credit cards for example)