OK, so we all get pissed off with Biff, chip and kipper

[Blandmum]

So lets do some 'alternative' texts

try this one for starters

Look, look at floppy.

Look at floppy run

Floppy has rabies

try this one

Four children come to the house. Kipper has the fags. Biff has the Diamond White.

"Come in", says Chip. "This nice man in here has something special for us".

See the dogs run away from Chip.

Chip has killed Floppy.

"Watch me put Floppy's head on a stick for the mums and dads!" calls Chip.

"that's your ASBO breached again," said Dad.

"With a throw like that, he must be G & T" thought Dad

Dad felt that the non-competitive sporsts day was leading to aggression.

well...my dd was reading 'The Blue Eye' the other night and they's all been whizzed over to the Middle East (complete with turbans and beards)...and hey, in the picture, there was a bloke carrying a Tesco shopping bag!!! Do they have Tescos in the Middle East then?