Have you all got a Will and appointed Guardians?

[unicorn]

After our near death experience on the M6 (tyre blowout)it has woken us up to the fact that we have neither.
So, we know we must get a Will sorted pronto.. but as for guardians for the kids, we really can't think of anyone who would either be suitable, or would want to take on the responsibility.
Just wondering what everyone else has done?

What a scary thought unicorn. I always thought that if anything happened to both of us the kids would automatically go with my parents. Was really shocked to find out that we have to appoint guardians. Would name my parents, but not sure what they would think about it. Maybe I should ask them first..........

it's a very important thing to do when you have children and have to say neither dh or I have a will..

unicorn how about your sister/sister-in-law, brother/brother-in-law for guardians?

i seem to have become super organised since bean arrived. i have a will, life insurance, premium bond thingys, everything.

my parents will be ds's gaurdians if anything happens to me. if they're not around it will be my sister

Same here unicorn - I asked my older sister once and she said "We;ll have to think about it" and never came back to me

DH - probate/wills/tax solicitor - normally recommends either you or your partner's parents or siblings where suitable. OR if you have very close friends willing to take on such a responsibility.

BTW guardianship naming isn't actually legally binding in your will. It is simply stating your desire.

I think it is also Cancer Research who do free wills sometimes through various solicitors.

But a good will is vital and they really aren't that expensive int he whole sheme of things - and certainly save you money when you do pass away. Dieing intestate can be very expensive for those left behind or to your estate.

lavender, had thought of them all, but they are either not appropriate (sil not been remotely interested in niece/nephew + sis not got kids and is rather, ahem, irresponsible) or if we asked the others I reckon they would just say they couldn't take on that sort of commitment now (either coz they have their own kids, or just too selfish)

I did mine just before I went on holiday. I did it mostly for who would be dd's guardian than what would happen to my belongings. but like Hulababy says it isnt legally binding. I have to write a memo to put with my will as to why Ive chosen the guardian choice

What about friends? godparents? other relatives. How about making a list of all the people you can think of and then work backwards from there.

No - don't scare me.
My sister did hers a few years ago and left me her children so I'm going to do the same to her too (when I get round to it - know we should do it etc etc)

We've done ours, kids to go to my parents as a preference... second choice my in-laws.

we did ours through will aid last year, have named dh's mum and my parents as guardians got to change it now and add my db.

Just remembered why we didn't do it before. DH wanted his sister to be guardian and I totally disagreed

message withdrawn

Actually Twiglett, after mentioning it to you on the other thread, we did contact MN about DH doing something with MN about wills.

will aid website www.willaid.org.uk

Hula - what does you dh charge? roughly

I think a normal will for couples is about £100 plus VAT; more is complicated or invloving tax planning, etc. That's for a "made for you and you alone" will - not just one following a set layout. Think it is pretty normal price for around here. You can get the cheaper from other solicitor's but DH is a specialist in this area and others may be general practise IYSWIM.

I'd imagine that's a normalish price for a will.

I would prefer to use a recommended lawyer as I used to work in the prof. indemnity department of a law firm and there can be sooo many cock ups - would your dh do it for us?

Course he would. He is currently looking into doing something about wills, etc. in partnership with MN anyway.

Just e-mail him at work on [email protected]. If you mention Mumsnet he'll figure out that you were the person I have just told him about He can do most stuff via e-mail. Amything more complicated may involve a telephone call at the most.

Er, no we haven't. . And we really must do...

thanks Hula - I'll do it tomorrow. Will check with sister if she'll be guardian..

OK, I'll tell him to look out for it Monday. He'll get back to you pronto - I'll make sure Hey, at least I get to justify my MN use for a bit again now. LOL

Yep we have up to date wills.

As it happens we have chosen friends to be guardians rather than family - siblings are out for various reasons, and parents will be getting too old (plus we know how much they screwed us up!).

That said we have an "annual" agreement. Around ds1's birthday each year we talk and decide whether to continue with the arrangement or whether to change it (obviously either party can chnge their mind ie us or the guardians-to-be). This way we don't feel that we're having to choose the best result come what may, but we are thinking about what is best for the children each year. Hopefully this will also add additional weight to the final decisions - ie we can show that the decision has been confirmed recently, rather than several yeasr ago.

In terms of choosing guardians we took the age of existing children into account ie it would be impractical to bequeath our 3yo and 1yo to someone who already has 3 children under 5!

£100 sounds OK for straightforward will. We have some tax planning in ours for which we paid £425 (plus VAT).

Another thread on this recently - avoid "will-writing" companies if you can - go to a solicitor.