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Original poster

So upset and it's all my own fault.

87 replies

nutcracker · 08/09/2004 17:11

Some of you may know that i was supposed to be going back to college this september.
I started the course last sept but dropped out just before i should of taken my exams at the end of the first term.
My friend also left but she did take her exams.

We both decided that we wanted to go back and have had a hell of a time trying to get back in as this years course is full.

My friend has just rung to say that our old tutor has told her that because she did her exams and got the credits she can start in yr 2's class. This will mean that she only has to do one yr now instead of 2.

I rang and was told that because i didn't do the exam and didn't get the credit I have to do the it all again from the beginning even though it means that for the first term i will be doing work that i have already done and assignments that i have already done and passed, same goes for presentations, mini tests e.t.c.

I am soo annoyed and upset, i have been crying since she rang. It's my own fault but it's ruined everything.
I won't be able to do the course at all now as i will have to much of a rush to get from school to college in the morning on the bus and home in rush hour on a bus with ds i do not fancy at all.

My friend feels quitye guilty i think as i was crying at her down the phone but obviously I don't want her to feel bad as it's my fault not hers.

Am just soooo anyoed with myslef for being so stupid.

OP posts:
CountessDracula · 08/09/2004 17:16

nutty call him back and talk about it in more detail. I'm sure they would do their best to help you. Can't your dh drop ds off?

Original poster
nutcracker · 08/09/2004 17:20

Hi cd, Dp can't drop ds off as he has to go out at 7:15, the college crech doesn't open until 8 at the earliest i think.

I did discuss it at great length with my tutor and explained that i may not be able to go back as i would struggle to get there and not be very happy about doing work i'd already done but she just said that I didn't get the credits so there is nothing she can do.

Called me a silly girl for not taking the exams before. Like i don't know that.

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Original poster
nutcracker · 08/09/2004 17:50

I'll have everyone moaning at me now too when i say i can't go back.

Can just hear my dad now 'well it's your own fault, you shouldn't have dropped out'.

I could really punch someone right now

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nikcola · 08/09/2004 18:23

im so sorry that this has happened nutty it must be so hard for , ithe stupid f**king collage isnt there anyting they can do ? thinking of you xx nikki xxxxx

MummyToSteven · 08/09/2004 18:24

nutty - i am confused. what is the main problem - that you have to repeat some work, or that your friend has different classes to yours so won't be able to give you a lift?

Momp · 08/09/2004 18:30

So sorry it's gone pear shaped for you Nutty, as I am sure I know how fed up I would be if it happened to me.

Don't know what to suggest but do hope it works out for you soon xxx

Original poster
nutcracker · 08/09/2004 18:33

Mts - The main prob is that i can't get there in time, or i could but would have to rush around even more than i do now.

Repeating the work is stupid too though. I worked hard whilst i was there and passed all of my assignments and presentations, and don't see why those marks can't stand and be taken into account.

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MummyToSteven · 08/09/2004 18:36

are there any other colleges doing the classes at more convenient times? i appreciate it may mean missing out and having to reapply for next year, but surely that is better than giving up on your dream completely. For the assignments, would you be able to submit the ones you have already done?

Original poster
nutcracker · 08/09/2004 18:40

Well it's the nearest college to me so i don't know.

They seem to have bent over backwards to help my friend. When i left i didn't hear a word from college. When she left they wrote and called her several times trying to get her to go back and now they have done this.

As far as the assignments go, i suppose i could resubmitt my previous ones, but i will still have to do all the presentations again and will have to sit through hours of stuff i have already done.

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Avalon · 08/09/2004 18:43

How flexible is your tutor? Maybe it won't matter if you get there a little bit late.

If she won't/isn't allowed to accept your old assignments for the new course, you'll still be able to use the work you've already done by copying it out, won't you? And, if she's marked it and given some helpful comments, your work should be even better!

Avalon · 08/09/2004 18:49

Also, if you know what stuff the course is going to cover (and that it hasn't changed since last year) can't you just miss those classes?

Original poster
nutcracker · 08/09/2004 18:51

The thing is, one of the reasons i left before was because i was always rushing to get ready to go (did it of an eveniung then).

Now it will be just as bad.
I drop the Dd's off at 9am and would then have to get the bus through rush hour traffic and drop Ds at crech and get into class at 9:30.
It can sometimes take until 9:30 just to get into the town centre and then i have about a 10-15 min walk to get to the college.

OP posts:
Original poster
nutcracker · 08/09/2004 18:51

Apparently i can't miss them as i would have to be included in discussions for the presentations.

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coppertop · 08/09/2004 19:05

Does your dds' school have a breakfast club? Ds1's school has one for children whose parents need to get to work earlier. We don't use it but it's popular and not too expensive. It's about £1.50 per child I think.

LIZS · 08/09/2004 19:20

Would it be possible to ask someone else to drop the girls off at school on that day to give you more time to get there ? Have you got the actual timetable yet as it may depend on what the first session was as to whether you could be excused and make up the time later if need be. I understand that the travelling is going to be a hassle but if you really want to still do it could you arrange a meeting with the tutor to discuss a compromise, perhaps attending an equivalent presentation on the evening course.

Original poster
nutcracker · 08/09/2004 19:53

TBH i just feel so fed up with it all allready.

The girl i was going with was the first proper friend i've made in this area and we get on really well and have loads in common.
We were going to help each out with the course and moan to each other about the tutors.
I know that shouldn't really matter but i'm so pissed off about the whole thing.

and of course i'm not going to be happy when she finnishes a year infront of me for the sake of one exam.

OP posts:
Original poster
nutcracker · 08/09/2004 19:55

CT - The breakfast club is full. I already struggled to get an after school place for them.

The one person who could have taken them to school for me had just started a new job and there is no one else i could ask.

OP posts:
Galaxy · 08/09/2004 19:56

message withdrawn

Original poster
nutcracker · 08/09/2004 22:29

Well i've had a nice relaxing bath now and another not so relaxing cry, now have red nose and puffy eyes to match my frown.

Just can't see at the mo how i can work this out.

Don't know what to do if i can't do it. I hate not being in controll of my life it drives me mad.

OP posts:
aloha · 08/09/2004 23:05

You can do this. YOu just need to work out how. Sit down and write down lists of solutions - not problems - only solutions. Even if they sound mad. Anything at all you can think of - even if completely insane-sounding (get a taxi every day). Also make sure you know exactly what will happen. Will your classes always start at exactly 9.30? Or will that only happen, say, once a week. I think it must be standard practise that if you didn't pass the exam you have to repeat the year, I can understand your frustration, but I can't see how they can move you onto yr2 without an exam pass. Remember, year one will much easier for you this time round and you will have a head start on everyone in yr2 when you get there. Also, I don't really understand the problem. Was your friend going to give you a lift? Why won't she now if you are going to the same course, albeit in different years?

aloha · 08/09/2004 23:06

And remember, you thought dropping out last time was a good idea but you have regretted it very much. Think how much you would regret it if you did it all over again.

californiagirl · 09/09/2004 02:01

Have you actually checked the hours on the creche at the college? Could you hire somebody just to take the girls to and from school (another mother, or an older student who lives nearby, or a pensioner -- any of them might be happy to do it for pocket money type amounts)?

One of the hard things to understand about degrees is that people value them precisely because they show that you can put up with rules you don't control that seem pointless. It's not just about education, it's also about dedication. I know that's not what people say is the important part, but it really is part of what makes a degree valuable; it shows you can carry out a project over the long term and overcome difficulties. You need to think of this as one of those difficulties.

Does the college have any sort of student aid center that might help you? A group for returning/mature students, or a women's center? These groups may know of tricks or solutions and may be able to help you negotiate to get some extra concessions.

Stop fussing at yourself for being stupid! Say to yourself "It would have been better to have taken the exams, but I wasn't able to do it then. This time I can do things differently."

bloss · 09/09/2004 05:13

Message withdrawn

Gingerbear · 09/09/2004 06:54

Agree with Bloss and Aloha. Also californiagirl's post uplifted my spirits - she must have done wonders for yours!
Find out if your friends Yr2 classes coincide with yours - you could still get a lift with her some days.
Also, you will meet other people and make new friends in your year. If not you could always bribe them to be your friend by selling copies of your previous assignments - hey, that would pay for your taxi fares!! (bit unethical though)

You can do this Nutty.

Original poster
nutcracker · 09/09/2004 10:28

Sorry i haven't explained myself very well have i.

The course is one day a week on a tuesday. My friend will now be doing mondays.
I know i'm probably just being defeatest but i can't help it.
One of the main reasons that i left the last course was because i hated having to rush around so much to get there.
Yes i could probably get there a bit late and no they probably wouldn't mind that much, but I know, come the winter and the pouring rain the last thing i'm going to want to do is stand in a bus queue and then walk up to college.

Your right i do really want to do it but not like this.

I have looked into all the other ways of doing the cours and none of them are any better so i just cannot see how i can do it.
I couldn't get a taxi as i can't afford too, and can't afford to pay anyone to take the kids to school either.

The more my friend tells me the more i am getting annoyed too. She only did term 1 year 1 the same as me, but they are putting her straight into yr2. I asked her what she has to do about the work she should of done in the rest of yr1 and they have told her that they will try to give her extra bits to do to get her the rest of the credits she needs. So basically she hasn't got to do the majoity of the first yr.

I spoke to my mom about it this morning and she said well why don't you just get a job for now and then go back to college in a year or so.
Yeah right a job doing what. I can't even get a xmas job in a toy shop.

I did sit the entry test for nursing about 4 yrs ago and i did pass. A pass is supposed to enable you to apply straight to uni without the relevant qualifications.
I'm not sure though if there was a time limit on it so i am going to email the uni sat the test at and ask them. Think i would need relevant work experiance too though, which i don't have.

Dp has been useless, just said oh right when i told him.
Just when you think your lifes finally getting better something comes along to knock you back down, typical.

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