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Original poster

Do you ever wish you hadn't chosen the name you did for you dc/feel you haven't 'bonded' with their name?

75 replies

ilovethis · 29/03/2007 12:51

I couldnt have the name i wanted for DD1 due to family reasons and i've never really gotten used to the name we did give her. She's always been known by a series of nicknames and at 3.5 yo i still rarely call her by her real name. Now the same thing is happening with dd2 6 mo, tho to a lesser extent. Her name just hasnt grown on me. I feel bad about this, anyone else had this happen?

OP posts:
southeastastra · 29/03/2007 12:52

sort of but he's five now so can't change it! i would have called him something less abrupt!

expatinscotland · 29/03/2007 12:53

dd1 had no name for the first 4 days of her life, because we just couldn't think of one to suit her.

finally, a midwife came in to pick her up and said, 'if you ask me, she looks a wee [insert her name].' eureka!

that really was her name.

suits her to a T!

dd2 looked like her name, which was DH's beloved Nana's name. and again, it suits her very well.

fleacircus · 29/03/2007 12:57

My parents changed my name when I was a few months old - they added another name into the middle and used that instead of my first name. Because (I'm not joking) one day my mum took me to the park and 'all the dogs in the park' - says she - had my name. It's quite nice feeling like you have a choice; I went to a 6th form where I knew nobody and used my first name there. I still use it occasionally if I don't want to give my real name for whatever reason.

lulumama · 29/03/2007 12:58

hmmm....DD is known by a nickname version of her first name, really wanted to call her Amelie, but our surname is hard to pronounce, and has an accent in it, so didm;t want her to have years of spelling both her names, and endlessly repeating them

so it is her middle name instead, but no-one ever calls her the proper version of her first name. want to change it legally, but DH won;t let me

Original poster
ilovethis · 29/03/2007 12:59

It wouldnt be so bad if we hadnt spent so long arguing about names. Both mine were nameless for at least 3 weeks after being born...

OP posts:
Psycho · 29/03/2007 13:02

Fleacircus all the dogs on the park are now called my DS1's name!!

JoanCrawford · 29/03/2007 13:03

Oh I spend hours wishing dd2 had a different name. I don't dislike it so much, as wish I had chosen something else. Also, I had no idea how bloody popular her name was until I named her. Now when I shout xxx in the park, 10 little girls look round!

Charleesunnysunsun · 29/03/2007 13:04

I had my kids names picked out since i was about 10 years old! I was all set on them and they never changed until DS1 was born and i suddenly decided i hated it and called him something completley different!

soph28 · 29/03/2007 13:04

with ds we knew what he was going to be called if he was a boy so he was named straight away and we love it- he really suits it.

with dd she does suit her name but as her middle names we gave her names after both grannies (Caitlin and Rose), I think she might have suited Rosie as a first name more than her actual first name but she is only 8mo and I think it will continue to grow on me.

Original poster
ilovethis · 29/03/2007 13:05

lulumama - we had the same problem - my surname was already foreign when i lived in the UK so i'd been spelling it since i was a child, now we're in a different country and its still foreign. DP's surname is of the language of the country but has an unusual spelling. So we ended up giving both DDs local first names which need no spelling to make their lives easier.

OP posts:
Psycho · 29/03/2007 13:06

My DS1 is called Max.

He goes to Beavers, where there are 3 Max's, 3 Harry's and 2 Ben's.

We lack imagination where I live I think

I still like it, just wish is wasn't so common (in the ubiquitous rather than chavvy sense)

Original poster
ilovethis · 29/03/2007 13:07

Then of course they both ended up with names with 's' in them and i have a lisp so i feel self-conscious about saying them...
God, i sound like a complete idiot!

OP posts:
Caligula · 29/03/2007 13:08

YEs I don't really go a bomb on DD's name

I changed it at the last moment just before we went into the registrar's office. The only reason was because my ex-MIL's aunt had died that year and she was feeling a bit depressed about it and her aunt's name was one of my candidate names. I like it, it's just not the first name I would have chosen. I was wavering and my ex and his bonkers mother wanted it so much and I figured that as he was obviously going to have bugger-all input into her life (because he can't be arsed to, not because I'm stopping him) the least she could have from that side of her family is her name - she is named after her father's great aunt.

She gets sod all else from them, so i suppose it was the right choice. But I sort of wanted to call her after my grandmother. Oh well. She's called by her second name anyway, I have the Irish confusion about names.

bananaloaf · 29/03/2007 13:13

ds1 name was choosen before he was born if he was a boy. ds2 was names by dh in delivery room within 10mins cos he spoke to his mother. althoug i like it i wasnt overly fond of it and felt that we could have discussed it more. however it suits him now and there arent that many. funnily enough both dss middle name are ex boyfriend of mine but they were choosen by dh and he doesnt know!

sweetkitty · 29/03/2007 13:19

DD1's name was always our girls name, when we found out at the scan she was a girl she became her name pure and simple. It was never a debate. However, I still love her name but I know at least 6 other girls with her name and that's just ones I know.

DD2 has a very unusual name (although she is one of 12 born in Scotland last year thought we were unique) we were in two minds about her name for ages but when she was born it suited her and it has so grown on me I adore it now.

My friend called her DD one name then went back and change dit about a week later.

Cloudhopper · 29/03/2007 13:27

Dd1's name hasn't really settled for me yet - she is 3 1/2. I think it was one of those names that you think about when you read baby books, then decide against it and go for something more sensible.

So even though we had sort of agreed it, when she was born, dh phoned everyone in excitement and told them her name. When I came round in recovery after the CS it was too late to change. Or so I thought. I was gutted.

SO many people look surprised or ask why we chose that name, and I get really worried about how it is going to look on application forms when she gets older. There is part of me that feels it really doesn't matter, but there is a part of me that feels guilty.

As a result I have tried to persuade her to have a nickname, but she doesn't want to.

It's a real shame and I need to resolve the issue otherwise I will probably infect her with self-doubt as well. I would never say this to her, but somehow children overhear or pick up on things like that.

Baysmum · 29/03/2007 13:29

My DS didnt have a name for over a week as we werent 'allowed' by my mother to call him Joe as she already has a grandson of this name. She now denies that she put any pressure on us at all!!!?? We then ended up calling our son 'Bay' - although it is his middle name it has kind of stuck and though I love it and it suits him I am getting so fed up with explaining it and even defending it to other people. Am now pg with DS2 and am frantically trying to come up with a name I love - no luck yet!

dingolimpet · 29/03/2007 13:29

My Ds too had same name as all the dogs, I knew it was silly to call him Rover

squeakybub · 29/03/2007 13:31

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ENTP · 29/03/2007 13:34

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Celery · 29/03/2007 13:35

DD has the name of a flower, and she is the least flowery little girl I know. I called her it because I have a unisex name which I've always hated, and so I chose something ultra girlie - doesn't really suit her though!

badelaide · 29/03/2007 13:37

I never feel quite "right" when i use ds2's proper name, he's 9m.
Love the names we chose for ds1 and dd, but ds2's just doesn't work for me. We are going to change it, but even then the name he will have is not one i love.
We took 3 wks to name ds1, and the full 6 wks for the other dcs. Ds2 we had the appt at registry office on the very last day of the 6 weeks, at 10.45am. Left the house at 9.30 with dp saying...."so, what's it to be then?"
He's a very, very indecisive man!

badelaide · 29/03/2007 13:38

I'm very relieved that others feel like this, sort of makes you feel guilty doesn't it?, esp as I love other dcs names so much.

paulaplumpbottom · 29/03/2007 13:40

I regret DD's middle name. Its boring

Psycho · 29/03/2007 13:47

Cloudhopper do tell.......