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OP posts:
FloraFox · 02/07/2014 22:08

You've got an interesting mix of 'these words mean whatever we want them to mean' and 'these words have particular significance and if you misuse them you are transgressing and oppressive'.

Language and power, power and language.

Great point Buffy

SevenZarkSeven · 02/07/2014 22:08

Myrtle you seem very earnest about all of this, but a lot of what you are saying you have ended up apologising for very readily when it was pointed out what you said, and a whole bunch of "facts" you have given us are just plain wrong.

Further you managed, despite your posts stating that your abhor transphobia, to misgender another poster!

I kind of get the feeling that you are kind of repeating stuff which sounded very plausible somewhere else, but haven't actually thought some of it through.

CoreyTrevorLahey · 02/07/2014 22:10

Buffy, Beauvoir's 'on ne nait pas femme' does have a fair bit to do with socialization, but by that same token we could say that, if becoming a woman is a state achieved through action and experience then it need not necessarily be restricted to someone born biologically female.

No one can be born a woman.

MyrtleDove · 02/07/2014 22:10

Flora I've said that I can't define a female gender beyond what I've already said. Sorry. I don't know how to put it into words.

Buffy and Seven apologies. I was under the impression from Native American people that third gender was a term that's not used elsewhere - I think I am confusing it with 'two spirit' Blush Genuine mistake and I apologise.

LRD not a rude question at all. I think the most 'usual' term for my sexuality would be bisexual - I am not a lesbian though I am mostly attracted to women. I use queer partly because I like the association with the first gay liberation movements and the more political use of the term queer, and partly because I am attracted to those outside the gender binary and find queer a better term than pansexual. If I'm filling in an official form I will put down bisexual. I prefer using queer as a catch-all term rather than LGBT, since I dislike the broadening of LGBT to include allies.

MyrtleDove · 02/07/2014 22:12

Also generally - this thread has taken up more of my time than I meant it to Blush. I'm moving on Saturday and am in the middle of packing so will have to leave it for tonight. I will return tomorrow!

almondcakes · 02/07/2014 22:12

Buffy, I would really like you to do a thread on post modernism and post structuralism when you have time. I found out a lot from the one about the chapter you were doing, and it was really interesting.

ICanHearYou · 02/07/2014 22:12

Becoming a woman is achieved by the action of being born the female of the human species and the experience of being a female born of the human species.

mathanxiety · 02/07/2014 22:13

From the previous thread, by TiggyD:

^For those who don't like the word 'cis': It's only ever relevant when taking about trans and cis people. If you never used either prefix it would make talking about the issue really bloody hard.
"Cis" is just the opposite of "trans". We use both of neither. To say there are women and trans women is rather 'othering'. A bit like how the Daily Mail like to say "Gay politician", but never "Straight politician".^

I don't think there are words in English to express to you, Tiggy, how adamantly I object to use of the term ciswoman to describe me. 'Don't like' doesn't cover it, for me.

What you are telling me I have to accept is that now that transwomen are here I must accept a redefinition of my entire experience here on earth and suspend disbelief about certain irrefutable biological facts.

Transwomen are 'other' if they are the opposite of 'cis' as you assert. ("Cis" is just the opposite of "trans".)
Transwomen are not women, by definition (your own and others') and by biology.
Women are women. They are not men.
Men are men. They are not women.
Women are not 'ciswomen', in any context.
Men are not 'cismen' in any context.
We are all 'other'.

Get over it.

If you are offended by that suggestion, I suggest you reread your own post where you try to tell women to get over being called 'ciswomen' and explain that there is relevance to the term.

I find myself agreeing with earlier remarks that there is a huge whiff of mansplaining to this and a very masculine tendency on the part of the self identified transwomen here to crash in and expect women to forget about their experience and cater to transwomen's need to define themselves. Very ironic.

When a redesignation of someone else is 'relevant' in the context of your self definition, what you are doing is making someone else's experience of existence in this gendered world all about you and your experience.

I don't want you thinking of me as a ciswoman or referring to me as a ciswoman. I know from reading both threads that I am not the only women here who finds the term repugnant.

'Ciswoman' is a womanphobic term.

Transactivism does not have to be taken up by women.
Calling women 'ciswomen' is about using our existence for transactivist ends.

........
Kim (from previous thread):
Trans unemployment, suicide, self harm, mental health issues, lack of housing, abuse etc are very high. Those are the issues trans people should be fighting for. Not the issues that you hear so often on FWR.

So where is the campaign?
By that I mean 'When are you going to start it?'

Where are the voices raised by transwomen against the misogyny and woman phobia of transactivism that are discussed (and rightly because there is hatred of women involved) on FWR? Where are the voices of transwomen on FWR redirecting shrill transactivism's attention to real life issues for transwomen?

Must the feminist women and men on FWR do the job?

Tiggy I think the main problem on Mumsnet with regard to trans issues is that, particually in the FWR bit, a few nasty things some trans people have done are brought up continually as example why trans people shouldn't be allowed to do certain things. It's like if somebody were to say their company was making a prayer room for muslim staff, and lots of people started talking about suicide bombers. Yes, some people in both groups can be arseholes but the way some people talk you'd think these extreme examples were typical.

Tiggy, I think you don't understand what FWR is here for. It's here to challenge misogyny.

Should posters on FWR just ignore the hatred directed towards women and turn instead to the plight of transwomen? I'll answer that myself with a 'No'.

No, because feminism is about women's experience and women's rights, and women's unemployment and suicide rates and stopping the abuse of women and trying to do something about poverty among women. And feminism is also about challenging those who very obviously have as their agenda the hatred of women, whether that hatred comes from transactivists or MRAs or random common or garden kneejerk misogynists, and therefore challenging that is what you will tend to see on FWR, very appropriately.

In a nutshell, FWR is about challenging the arseholes who hate women. Hence the very proper focus on the arseholes.

Kim,
If you want activism on employment and other bread and butter issues for transwomen then you could start by asking MN for a specific trans board.
FWR is very correctly a discussion board for 'Feminism and Women's Rights'. (Note, not Ciswomen's Rights and not Transwomen's Rights.)

Thanks for explaining about how hard it is for women in the job market. See - if you were a man, I would call that mansplaining. I have been on MN for many years so I understand that.

Thanks for finally acknowledging that transwomen are not the only people with employment and other problems. It's not mansplaining to point that out, nor is it transphobic to ask transwomen to acknowledge it.

Nor is it transphobic to ask that the problems of transwomen be discussed on a separate board from those affecting women.

The comments on these threads about life for women in this gendered world are in response to the perception that transwomen are talking about these issues as if they are the first or the only people ever to run into difficulties getting on in the patriarchy. If you think the problems have a different character from those affecting women then a separate board is the way to go.

(Fwiw, from your comment that years of participation on MN have allowed you to learn about mansplaining I am very glad of the feminist presence here and FWR in particular, and glad the educational role of Feminism is having an impact.)

...........

And Kim, I think that categorising suggestions that trans people have mental health issues as insults is mental health issue phobic.

You perpetuate the stigma surrounding mental health issues every time you experience a suggestion of mental health issues as an insult.

CoteDAzur · 02/07/2014 22:14

"Beyond what you've said"? What have you said? [puzzled]

From where I'm sitting, you seem to be saying that 'female' and 'woman' are nebulous notions that anyone can claim for themselves, regardless of their biological reality. Any man who says he feels like a woman is a woman, right? Have I understood you completely irrational position?

LRDtheFeministDragon · 02/07/2014 22:15

Ok, I don't mean to be rude (again), but, well ... I think 'queer' in that context is a little bit problematic. You must know most people will think you mean you're gay.

I mention this because it seems to me a lot of your terminology is about reinforcing a binary, isn't it?

What's wrong with simply saying you're bisexual, or you're attracted to women more than men?

The thing is, if everyone uses these terms, there is going to be an ever-diminishing group who can be labelled as 'cis' or 'straight', isn't there? The situation will bear less and less resemblance to the actual power structures people struggle against.

This is quite personal, I admit ... I would feel horribly appropriative to refer to myself as 'queer'.

BriarRainbowshimmer · 02/07/2014 22:15

Sure is a lot of newspeak on this thread.
"Queer" is a slur. I find it offensive to see it used as a description of non-straight people and as an "identity."

SevenZarkSeven · 02/07/2014 22:15

Good point.

Won't lesbians get pissed off if I (a straight woman who happens to have quite a feminine appearance) go around describing myself as "queer"???

I wouldn't blame them, TBH.

Are there people who are using queer in the original reclaimed sense getting mighty fucked off with every tom dick and harry describing themselves as "queer" because they've got a pierced knob and once snogged someone the same sex (gender? whatever).

almondcakes · 02/07/2014 22:15

I believe that one day somebody will finally come on here and will explain what female gender identity is, and like anything else it will have actual characteristics, but it looks like today is not that day. Again.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 02/07/2014 22:18

seven - yes, this is something that really bothers me. And it does seem closely related to the situation with cis/trans.

I have had a well-meaning and entirely sweet woman suggest to me I'd be a 'diversity hire' in a US context, because I'm 'queer'.

My mind just boggles. It is absurd.

BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 02/07/2014 22:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 02/07/2014 22:20

buffy, you're speaking brilliantly as usual.

TunipTheUnconquerable · 02/07/2014 22:20

'Beauvoir's 'on ne nait pas femme' does have a fair bit to do with socialization, but by that same token we could say that, if becoming a woman is a state achieved through action and experience then it need not necessarily be restricted to someone born biologically female.'

Beauvoir implies that being born biologically a woman is not a sufficient condition, but she doesn't suggest it is not a necessary condition. You have to twist her whole argument to make her seem to support genderism in its current fashionable form.

MyrtleDove · 02/07/2014 22:21

I don't think most people will think I'm a lesbian. I dislike using bisexual since so many gay and lesbian people enforce bisexual erasure and ignore it as a legitimate queer/LGBT identity. Bisexual people are labelled as 'confused straight people' or 'indecisive'. Bisexual has a ton of very unfair baggage attached to it in LGBT circles.

Briar lots of people have reclaimed queer and it's not a slur if people are using it to describe themselves. I don't think the Queer Liberation Front et al use it as a slur, do they?

Seven but why would you use 'queer' if you're straight Confused I use queer as a non-straight woman, I don't expect straight women to use it. I'm not a lesbian, but I'm not straight.

And that's my last post for the night, goodnight everyone.

ICanHearYou · 02/07/2014 22:22

Round of applause for math

Excellent Post, Excellent.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 02/07/2014 22:22

Ah, ok, so you mean you avoid bisexual because you want to help out people who're bigots and dislike bisexuality? Confused

Why in god's name would you do that?

And sorry, I really don't believe most people think 'queer' means 'bisexual but not appropriating lesbian identity'. I think most people will think you're appropriating lesbian identity.

BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 02/07/2014 22:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FloraFox · 02/07/2014 22:24

Buffy I'd love for you to talk more about this: serious misunderstanding and misappropriation of postmodernist epistemology and language's relationship to power

I think you're right. I also think a lot of people are making pronouncements based on the equivalent level of understanding as myrtle's clitoris = tiny penis. The combination of scant understanding of biology and scant understanding of postmodernist epistemology is very dangerous.

On the SdB quote, I imagine SdB would be shocked to understand those words are being co-opted to mean that men can become women. I'm not very good at philosophy but I understood that as more of an existential comment about the nature of womanhood and the role of socialisation.

myrtle you do sound very earnest about this. I think though that you have said things on this thread that some people would consider transphobic, particularly recognising the existence of female biology (which I think you do?).

TiggyD · 02/07/2014 22:26

Transwomen are not women, by definition (your own and others') and by biology. -Math

They are by the definition of the Gender Recognition Act 2004. I hope Mumsnet obeys the law.

TunipTheUnconquerable · 02/07/2014 22:26

'I am coming to the conclusion that the problem is a serious misunderstanding and misappropriation of postmodernist epistemology and language's relationship to power. I think some people are getting a whiff of power in these new constructed categories and now they want to reel back the post from their modernism and solidify the constructions into objective reality. '

This, from Buffy. Exactly.

ICanHearYou · 02/07/2014 22:26

Buffy, you are bloody clever.

Its incredible, I am a little in awe of you.

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