Parents who take their nannies on holiday

[TheDullWitch]

Noticed a lot of this on holiday. This writer seems to think it s a bad idea. I came across one mother who was moaning about hols with young kids, then I noticed next morning at breakfast she'd brought her Filipino nanny!

it's here

I kind of think it stops you being a proper family, however convenient.

I have a friend who when on holiday has someone to get up her 3 kids and look after them around the pool, even babysit so she and her dh can go out for a meal: they're called grandparents! anyone who doesn't have this luxury can take a nanny, it's their business really, isn't it?

(me, I just come back from - ahem - "holidays" even more knackered than before I went. Bitter, moi?)

I went on 2 separate holidays with families when I nannied.

The first one I had to sleep in the room with 4 kids under 5!! not much fun......

The second holiday, different family, I had the tiny baby in my room and I had him all day. The parents took him for 1 hour between 5-6pm so I could have my dinner, then he was back in my room for the rest of the time.

Guess what, it was a nightmare both times!!

looking at the amount some of you 'mums' post Iwould say that employing a Nanny was near essential

I would kill to be able to take my nanny with me on my jaunt back to the UK in Nov.

It would only be for the flight (am travelling on my own again), so I can go to the toilet without taking DD with me, eat a little, and not do 24 hours of toddler management on no sleep, and after arrival use her for just one evening so she can babysit while I go out with my best friend who is in the middle of a bullying husband nightmare. I haven't seen her in a year and we could really do with a chat.

I'm also not quite sure how I'm going to go through all of our stuff in storage and repack the stuff I want to ship with DD in tow.

God I wish I could take her I just can't justify another $2K for helping out on 2 flights and one evening's babysitting.

And, I would love to take her to London, to show her Kingston and the river, and swans and squirrels and double decker buses and Hamleys and places to buy posh French stuff for her new 6 week old nephew.

Plus I was up for 4 days and 4 nights with DD's jetlag last time.

Interesting thread I have been quite taken by GDG's comment

'Well anyone who drags their small children round old cathedrals and expects them to enjoy it has a lot to learn about children!

Isn't put them in a holiday club just like an extension of going to nursery?? Aren't holidays about paddling in the sea, building sandcastles, exploring rock pools, going on boat trips, eating chips on the harbour.....??? '

We did all of this with the kids on our holidays, but made sure that was also do the cathedral type stuff.

We spent a day in Paris, lots of kid based stuff, boat trip down the river, trip to Eifel tower (for ds who has a scooby doo fixation about ti LOL), but we also went to the Musee D'orsay for an hour.

Holidays are for the kids, but also for dh and me. I want our kids to have fun, but also to realise that the whole family goes on holiday and all our interests are taken into account.

We also did disney.

We are taking our Flipino nanny back to the UK with us next month. I will be travelling on my own with 2 small children which is fine as I've done the flight alone before but it is going to be so much easier with her to help me. A big part of bringing her with us is so she can see the UK, we have already planned many sightseeing trips to do with her (which we wouldn't have done if she wasn't with us). She will of course be a tremendous help during our time. Going back to the UK for us means catching up with so many people so it will be nice to have a babysitter and catch up with some people in the evenings. I certainly don't feel like less of a family for having her around. In fact I would be very offended if someone suggested it to me.

Well I agree MB and we did do a castle on our holiday. I think it's harder to get smaller ones to do cathedral type things though - when they get to about 5 and up you can talk to them more about what you are looking at. At 2 they just don't get it do they? They want to be outside charging about. Ds1 who is 5 was quite interested in the moat, drawbridge, portcullis etc on the castle though so I can see that that kind of activity will work much better when they are all 5+.

I think the scenario I had in my head was of taking my 3 (all 5 and under) round a cathedral for a long period of time. Doing something adult oriented for an hour or two is something we did too and we did explain that while it was their holiday it was ours as well blah blah blah.

Please don't be under the impression I'm one of those parents that panders to their child's every whim because that is sooooooooo far off the mark it's not true!

Preston is commenting from the position of being (a) a bloke who I doubt did a lot of handson parenting when his own children were small, what with being editor of the Guardian and all (b) a devoted grandparent and thus I'll bet the farm on hand to pick up some of that parenting slack.

I'm with Morningpaper and WWW on this one. I am not hog-whimpering wild about drudgery and I have no problems with paid childcare.

My two have always been 'good' about cathedrals as the have school assemblies in one!

Have trained dd to point out the green men, and make herself look like the lkind of kid ocd would want to slap

When ds3 was a demanding baby I'd have kidnapped a stranger's naany off the beach in order to get some sleep !

Only joking; I think there's nothing wrtong with bringing a trusted neeny along, say to a villa or cottage where she has her own room, in order to be an extra pair of hands at times (not to be a drudge !)

I spoke to an acquaintance at a wedding recently and was horrified at her set up; she brought along her nanny - her kids are 3,6 and 8 - plus the family sharing the French villa with them had 3 kids of 2, 5 and 6. Poor nanny sounded like a total drudge, to judge from the desciptions I heard of the 4 adults spending long days sipping drinks by the pool ! Shocking !

Having just spent a lovely holiday in PIL's beach side apartment with a couple of days away for me and DH in a hotel and many hours of free babysitting provided my PIL, I really don't feel I can comment on people who bring their nannies on holiday.

iVE had some WONDERFUL HOLIDAYS with my first family.... was with them for 5 years...

even this summer i joined them for the first 5 days of there annual family holiday (as it coincided with my current families holiday so i was 'off' anyway)

I wouldnt want to go on holiday with my oterh families though (and its their family time and they dont want me either)

all i can say is that being a nanny and being on holiday with the parents is not always that bad.... as long as they family are right and its treated as YOUR OWN holiday as well!

These last 2 years ive taken my annual holiday going on all expenses paid cruises with my old family... on board there is child care from 9am right through til 2am.... child sleeps in my room and i hand child over at breakfast.... we do our own thing.... and i eat with them in the evenings...

places ove been while nannying include

the ARCTIC (amazing)
russia France Germany Estonia sweden norway denmark SKIING
yachting / power boating all over the solent / south of engalnd / france / channel islands etc!

i have LOVED every minute ive been on holiday with the families whom i have worked for...

hopefully wil do a carribean cruise next year

Taking a nanny on holiday is a lovely idea - if you can afford to pay nanny whilst you holiday. In my house we all take holiday at the same time. But, when we do go onholiday I always say that it would be so much nicer if I could just give the kids to someone else so I caould have dinner in peace. I want them with me the rest of the day, but not dinner.

My friend who is a nanny has had some fantastic trips with one of her old families. Her "job" whilst there was to get the kids up so the parents could lie in until 10, then do a couple of nights' babysitting. Rest of time was her own. And she was paid, with her 4 weeks' annual leave untouched. She said you get an idea of whether you are going to be well treated or not on holiday by how you are treated on home turf.

I have been on hols with friends who have taken their nanny. It's been great. Time off for the parents, someone else who the kids know and like and a decent trip for the nanny who was getting paid as well as being away from home. I would love it if I had the £££££.

I pay for childcare here as I work and would willingly pay for a few hours here and there on hols. It's just finding the person to do it if you don't take a nanny which is the problem!

agree wholeheartedly with expat and jimjams and anyone else who thinks the whole idea is ludicress. Why bother having kids in the first place if you are going to employ someone to look after them when, quite frankly, you can't be bothered.

and "some parents aren't used to looking after their children 24/7 and the children are used to being with the nanny", or however that post read ... well q post on here in 20 years time saying "my parents were never there - we were left with the nanny, even on holiday because my parents didn't know how to handle us."

and "children love being with the nanny"? that's because they don't know what it's like to be with their parents. Sure if you are working and feel the need for a nanny then that's all well and fine, but a holiday is just that, a holiday, and it's a holiday for the kids as well fgs, a time when they can have time with their family, not being palmed off on to the hired help.

Was talking to a woman in the park the other day and she was telling me how when she was a nanny, she was taken on holiday with the family, she and the kids travelled economy and the parents travelled 1st class.

Well,we took our Filipina nanny on holiday for a couple of short breaks when we lived in Singapore. She babysat in the evenings and when DS2 had his daytime nap, and got up early with the children. The rest of the time she was free to do what she wanted.

We only did it twice though, as I found it more stressful worrying about whether she was OK.

Would taking Grandma on holiday offend people less?

I can't see the problem with having a trusted babysitter to allow an evening out, TBH.

Is it the fact that a nanny is 'paid for' that is bothering people?

That's exactly how we see the role of our Filipino nanny/help. She is there to look after the children when they are asleep either at night or during the day - I don't see how my children are loosing out on our attention! When my children are awake my nanny/maid does some of the household jobs so I can spend MORE time with the children. Q the post in a 20 years time "My mum was ALWAYS there!" (Poor children )

I have never taken our nanny on holiday with us for two reasons.Firstly she takes her holidays when we take ours and secondly I couldn't afford it.
She is part of our family and I would far rather dd was with her for a couple of hours than some strangers in a kids club (she is only 16mts at the moment though).
I would love to have the luxury of a lie in but there is no way I would expect her to get up for dd either during the night (unless of course I was away)or early in the morning.
She has her hours and is a professsional-the problems arise when some employers forget this and abuse the situation.
I really do not see the difference in taking a nanny on holiday or Grandparents.

we hired a local nanny when we went on holiday - she was fab. we all went round together but she babysat in the evenings and gave me and dp a few hours quality time in afternoon. lovely!