cocktail frock horror

[dis]

I'd really appreciate some advice from those of you who stil have a social life, re cocktail frocks. Am going to a posh birthday do, mid-summer 'black tie/ cocktail' dress code.
What length is a cocktail dress, and what style is best for 5'3", still bf (so definitely need sturdy bra!), size 16 bum, fat thighs/calves/ankles, and not very attractive feet!!! I know it sounds like I should just stay at home with the curtains shut, but as I've been either pregant or breastfeeing since Sept2001, and been on a night out less than 10 times in all that time - I'd really like to push the boat out, spend some money and feel nice!

(Oh, and did I mention I also had a really disastrous haircut a couple of weeks ago as well).

Sorry, what's a social life??

mmmm.....perhaps I'm narrowing the field too much.

Oh dear Dis My advice would be to wear something that is fairly comfortable, otherwise you won't enjoy yourself. If you want to spend money, what about Monsoon...they do nice dresses without them being too much. Oh, if only I could spend some money...I WANT new shoes! What about a fitted black dress, with glitzy jewellery, shoes and bag...lucky you. Oh, and can you have your hair re-done, or is it now a crew cut!

I'm I looking for long or short then? I think I might get myself a fake tan done then legs might not look quite so dodgy. I did read in a mag this week that wedgey sandals are good for people with 'cankles', they're fat calves that sort of run straight into your feet without actually bothering with an ankle!

Dis - I know b*gger-all about cocktail dresses but this thread is hilarious!

LOL at "Cankles"!!

dis - ypu have really made me laugh.
The best thing you can wear hon' is a smile everything else is secondary!

However, I would say that a nice style may be...
a knee length dress, black, but with netting under skirt, so a bit like something from Greece. ful skirt will detract from anything you are feeling concious about. I bought a strapless dress that had netting under skirt from Warehouse at Xmas. Lots of the skirts and dresses at the time had netting.

Let us know how you get on.

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I think that you should wear something that is ankle length. In this day and age, "black tie/cocktail" just means get dressed up nicely. I don't think you have to wear a certain length dress. If you are self concious about your ankles, by all means ,cover them up. You will feel better and therefore have more fun at the party. I have had great luck having things made to order for myself. If you get a good seamstress (they do still exist) then you can pick your own fabric and get a dress made to work around your body. Find pictures of things you like and get something made that puts all the elements together. That way you can be sure it will fit around your breasts and not show your sturdy bra. My biggest problem when bfing was that I wasn't particularly fat anywhere else except my breatst, but when I found clothing that fit around my breasts, it hung off me in drapes everywhere else.
Disastrous haircut will grow out by the summer.

For me, an invite that says black tie definitely means getting dressed up in a posh frock. I always prefer longer length dresses for cokcktail dresses. Seem to go best against DH's black tie suit.

Got my last cocktail dress in February from House of Frazer. There was a reasonable amount of choice around too in places like that, and Debenhams and Monsoon (often a bit long though and I am only 5 foot) too.

Sure there was a cocktail dress thread last week - try there for more advise too.

Here it is.

If you're still bf, then presumably separates would be better. A long straightish skirt with a matching "vest"(ie sleeveless) top in a nice colour and fabric - silk if you can afford it, maybe beaded, with a nice stole/shawl and some matching shoes. By getting separates, you might also be able to get more wear out of the outfit - eg wear the top with black trousers for Christmas.

If you get something long line that just skims your ankles, then you're not exposing them too much - but it should still be flattering for your height.

Monsoon, as somebody suggested, usually does good stuff in this vein. The heavily beaded stuff does hang nicely (although I'm not sure about pulling up a heavily beaded top for a breast feed! )

What's your bum like? If it's shapely, then think about something cut on the bias, to show off your curves. If a dress is OK, then maybe get something on the bias, floaty and with a handerchief hem - gain, helping to hide your ankles.

Let us know what you get!

As was said on the other thread M and S underwear is marvellous!! Squashes everything in ......maybe you should make a 'feature' of your boobs!! Bodyshaper tights squeeze everything in too......you wont be able to breathe but you will look great!!

Honey what's your best bit - mine is my legs so I cover the rest up - a short burqua for me then - ha ha ha - if you like your boobs go for risque low cut jobbie but down to floor - if you like your bottom you could go for clingly long number - if you don't like anything you can have my full length burqua (for when I have forgotten to shave my legs!!! )

I would go with the personnal shopper idea - and ebenhams have some lurvely stuff in at the moment in the designers range - Jesire also do some nice bits and bobs and I do like Hobbs too although always think they are mega overpriced!!

I'm with Collision - show off your enviable cleavage to detract from the bits of you that don't quite pass muster.

Btw you paint a very negative picture of yourself and I bet you look a heck of a lot better than you give yourself credit for.

Twinkie - you do make me laugh!!!

Sorry to crash your thread, dis, have no useful info so will bugger go away now - but good luck anyway!