Quality of Life Today

[Bugsy]

Now this is not meant to be a party political thing, but I want to know whether people think that life in this country has improved in the last decade. I am feeling particularly hacked off today, hideous commute, crappy project and grumpy toddler pre-work but I think my quality of life is slowly going down the toilet.
Since I started working, some 10 years ago, I've watched the tube service get worse, the train service get worse, local hospitals close departments & wards, traffic congestion increase, parking become more difficult & expensive. One way or another through NI, VAT, road tax my tax burden has increased and I can't help wondering what is going on.
Do other people feel like this, or am I just Mrs Misery today? As I say, I am not trying to get at any one political party but I would be interested to know how others feel about their quality of life in the UK over the last 10 years.

SueDonim-I would endorse your praise of "breast is Best" - I followed the advice it gives when feeding my 5 boys- all successfully for between 9 and 18 months. My eldest is now 20(!) and the youngest just 3. When I had the eldest boys the advice still being given by midwives was to initially feed for "3 minutes each side" every four hours-no wonder most mothers did not succeed.Luckily I had read the book and ignored the advice!

Janh-Reading back on this thread I saw your posting of 26th Feb.I have been through a similar experience in the last two years. I was diagnosed with cancer of the oesophagus in March 2000.I underwent 3 months of chemotherapy which made me extremely sick-I also developed a blood clot on the lung,and underwent the same treatment as yourself.( In fact I still take warfarin as I have sticky blood).I then had 5 weeks of intensive radiotherapy-not pleasant when it is directed at the oesophagus. Finally I had an oesophagectomy (complete removal of the oesphagus) in December 2000.By the way, my youngest ds was just a year old when I was diagnosed. A total nightmare!

Annie G, my oldest is almost 27 and I did the 3-mins-each-side-every-four-hours bf routine, which is why my 26 yr old was ff by three weeks. Then "Breast is Best" was published a year later and I took it with me everywhere with my next baby, sneaking it into hospital. I fed babies 2 and 3 for over a year and baby No4, who is nearly six, for two years.

What an awful time you have had, healthwise. I do hope you're fully recovered now.

SueDonim-Yes, thank you, I am well at the moment-fingers crossed! I have been unable to return to work (I was a social worker-tried to return following the treatment, but I just did not have the stamina anymore!)So have now been "retired" on health grounds-at least I can now spend more time with the family.

Honeybunny, what would help you with regard to productivity? I agree that anyone who thinks making enough milk is just a matter of letting the baby feed a lot is not giving an accurate picture...though that can be part of it! I wonder if the NCT bfc was actually asked about Gina Ford, and whether this was the reason for 'having a go'. I think it's probably true that GF's understanding of how bf works is not the same as NCT's, but I also think NCT workers should be flexible, and accepting that different styles of parenting can be helpful for different people.

I thought this site had lots of interesting breastfeeding Q&A's

www.parentsplace.com/expert/lactation/archive/0,10693,239793,00.html

Tiktok-who knows? I struggled with ds from about 6weeks. Managed to keep going til 20weeks with lots of expressing and delaying feeds, or interspersing evening feeds with a top up of expressed to give my boobs sufficient time to refill before late night feeds. ds was not a great feeder at any time, so maybe he had a lot to do with lack of supply. Who knows? Its not a definite science after all is it? I'm just hoping for an easier time this time, with me feeling a little more successful on the bf front.
GF was brought up in NCT bfc as being the greatest source of calls to the NCT bf helpline. We were going to talk about schedule vs demand feeding!! Ring any bells, ladies??!!! Women trying to stick to the routines and failing (not sure in what context failing, class ended and discussion was put off for another night).
I just felt it was a little dogmatic, and as I was the only one to have heard of and successfully followed GF (the rest=1st timers) a little unfair on the rest to perhaps predujice them before they have a chance to make those kind of parenting decisions for themselves. Agree that NCT vs GF philosophies differ on bf, and most other topics it would seem!
Any way, I only mentioned it here because Jasper and I were in agreement over the frustration of always getting the same advise on production, which didn't appear to help either of us. And we're both hoping it will be better this time around.
Very quiet on the Jasper front. R U still here Jasper or are things moving? Good luck again!

You're right, honeybunny, that the baby can be part of bf production....sometimes, if bf gets off to a difficult start, mothers have a hard time later on in keeping up to speed with the baby's needs. There are some physiological reasons for this - it appears hormonal receptors need to be set up with frequent, effective feeding at the beginning to maximise bf success later. That's not to say that a poor start leads to problems later on, as this is not by any means inevitable, but it can be a factor. A baby who feeds ineffectively for whatever reason can reduce the chances of happy bf.

Not sure why GF was brought up as the main cause of calls to the bf line. I won't blow my cover, but this is abso-bloomin'-lutely not true and I am in a position to know, believe me...though it may be true of an indvidual counsellor's current experience. GF is sometimes mentioned, in my experience, and scheduling/frequency of feeds is often a source of grief to mothers, and they can often be helped to enjoy bf and have a better experience if they stop trying too hard to get the baby to feed according to GF or GF-type routines.

Waiting for your breasts to fill up rings alarm bells with me, as this isn't a way to make more milk. I hope I'm not repeating something you have already heard and found lacking, but if a baby is feeding effectively he will remove milk effectively, and milk is then replaced very quickly...the process even begins when he is still sucking. Your breasts may feel fuller after a longer gap, but this is not the result of a large amount of extra milk (a bit like the beach ball which only needs a small amount of air to make the difference between a comfortably pressable beach ball and a hard one). Nevertheless, these over-full breasts then send a hormonal message back to the pituitary saying 'stop making milk!'...over time, this reduces the milk made, especially as the baby is being made to wait between breastfeeds, so the removal of milk takes place less often....leading to less milk.

This time, it will help if you can work with the physiology of bf, and feed your baby often and make sure he is latched effectively so he can make a good job of removing the milk and getting the creamier milk that satisfies him and piles the weight on.

Hope this helps a bit...and sorry if the NCT class was not helpful to you.

Honeybunny thanks for asking. It is indeed VERY quiet on the Jasper front, unfortunately. A funny thing has happened now my due date has come and gone...I feel like labour is even LESS iminent! How illogical is that? I am getting loads of aches and pains in the general baby/groin area, but none of them the right sort, ie no contractions in the last few days ( lots last week )
I too am concerned about the bf. Tiktok, is it a bad sign that at this stage I can't express even a drop of milk?

Nooooooo, Jasper! Not a bad sign at all : ) Women very hugely in the amount they can express antenatally (and postnatally, too) and in any case it can sometimes reflect the technique of expressing - a different sort tweakin' and you might get more. Good luck!

Tiktok...Hope I catch you.
I am looking at training as a bf counselor. Any advice ??? where to train, etc ?I know DOH does one anyone else ?
Thanks

Jasper - I was 2 weeks late with dd and I know exactly what you're saying about feeling like labour is never going to happen! The one thing I wish I had done was walk more- one shopping trip to the trafford centre and my friend was getting great contractions by the time she left! Now you don't need a better excuse to go shopping than that?!!

Good luck X

Same here, Lizzer and Jasper. My second son was born two weeks past the due date. For that fortninght, I felt as if I was going to be pregnant forever. The day befor I went into labour I took my other son for a long walk in the Park, so there might well be something in your theory, Lizzer.

No Jasper since early this morning! Have things started moving, or has she just gone for a LONG walk?!

I went for a LONG, cross and determined walk when I was 2 days overdue with dd and went into labour that evening.

Mind you, it was a double edged sword as I was b**y knackered by the time I went into labour

Could just be coincidence, but I also went for a long walk and labour started that evening. Hope things get moving for you soon Jasper.

Well I am now having mild contractions (due date tomorrow) about every 20 mins and waiting around at home as this is supposed to be a home birth, so who knows what might happen.....We've put the plastic sheeting down and are wondering what we should do about older ds and dd (both born in hospital). How long will this take? I hate the unpredictability of it all and the thought of all that pain isn't particularly appealing...aagh, what have I done? Good luck, Jasper, if you're in the same situation!

Sid, how exciting! Hope everything goes well, keeping fingers and everything else crossed for you all.

Who needs Jordan giving birth on the internet, when we have Sid .... keep us updated!

Good luck Sid, hope all goes well for you both.

Sid - no panic.
DS went to bed a bit earlier on the day I was in labour (at home) and he was very obliging actually.... if they are up by the time you have given birth....don't worry there are plenty of people who give birth with their other kids present !

GOOD LUCK

Sid, I gave birth with dd sitting by me on the bed - wouldn't have planned it like that, it just happened. It was wonderful, and she was not at all perturbed by it. And no need to explain to her how babies come out!
Good Luck whatever happens

I'm still here, with a TENS machine on now, but think I will stop posting now as one comparison with Jordan is enough! (Probably the only one anyone could ever think of making anyway...)