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Original poster

Do you think you're fat?

421 replies

ThingsThatGoHumpInTheNight · 08/08/2013 22:22

I do. And I'm wrong. I know rationally I am not fat. I am 5'5 weigh 9st7ish, dress size 8-10, body fat 18-22%, you can see my ribs from behind and my abs in front....so why oh why do I constantly feel crap about myself?

I do eat more crap than I probably should do (chocolate 5 times a week Sad ) and I do carry weight up top (32FF boobs)...but I am not fat. So why do I feel like I am? Constantly worry that I am. People I don't know well (new work colleagues, random people at parties) make offhand comments 'healthy breakfast again eh?' this morning as I ate a croissant and fruit at my desk and it makes me feel awful.

Are other people like this? Why????

Sorry to anyone this offends...I feel for people with weight issues, I really do, but been thinking about this today (sparked by comment this morning) and wondering if I am the only one?

OP posts:
AngryFeet · 09/08/2013 14:33

Yes I am fat. I am 5ft 3 and 13 stone. But I feel better about myself than I ever have. My parents also made my life hell calling me fat and restricting food when i was a teen. So i was very insecure for a long time. Living with a man who tells you that you are gorgeous and your body is sexy every day for 11 years clearly changes your view Grin.

I did lose weight for our wedding and got down to 9st 9 which was better for my health but i was far more critical of myself then than i am now. I wouldnt want to be very thin. A size 12 is perfect for me. I guess skinniness makes me think of my mum who is a size 8 but obsessive about food and a bit of a narcissist.

I think if i werent so aware of other peoples opinions i wouldnt care at all. I feel healthy and can do a hard aerobics class without too much effort. I am a size 16 and dress well to compliment my best bits. I am pear shaped so not too much weight around my organs just a big bum which i love!

The only part i dislike is my tummy which is saggy after kids but it looked worse when i was thin!

But i will lose more weight. I am doing it very slowly and have lost 1.5 stone since jan without too much effort.

EasyToEatTiger · 09/08/2013 15:15

Even wild animals have wrinkles and bumps and spots... It's not just us. I do think sometimes that humans are quite an unattractive species. Not that I find other species any better!

libertychick · 09/08/2013 15:34

OneLittleToddleTerror walking for an hour a day is exercise provided you do it at a reasonable pace. I understand that some people don't regard walking as exercise but that hour a day walking will keep keep your heart in good shape, reduce the future risk of cancer and alzheimers and as it's weight bearing reduces the risk of osteoporosis in women. It helps cure/prevent mild to moderate depression and over time will help control your weight. It is scarily misinformed to dismiss the importance of walking as a form of exercise. Just because an activity doesn't make you sweaty or develop abs does not mean it's not important or contributing enormously to someone's health and wellbeing.

nethunsreject · 09/08/2013 15:45

I'm thin, BMI 21, tall. HOWEVER I am very unfit just now and don't feel great about my flabby stomach; a bit of excercise would do wonders for me and my mood.

Talkinpeace · 09/08/2013 15:46

No, I am not fat.
My recently taken profile picture is public.
BUT

Being fat or thin is not the issue.
having fat in places it should not be ( particularly visceral fat around your organs ) is the issue

and everybody should take steps to reduce their long term risk of crippling diseases by managing their fat levels

which is NOT the same thing as arbitrary clothes sizes.

yummytummy · 09/08/2013 15:47

Yes I do. But thats mainly because I have a horrible husband who whenever he loses temper says "you're FAT" and now I have heard it so many times I believe it even though when I try to detach I guess I cant really be
fat if clothes are size 10-12.
Him saying that has made me feel I dont deserve to eat so have lost a lot of weight

Also here get your ugly face out of my face a lot.

Agree with previous poster who said how u feel about your size is linked to your self esteem and asvi dont have any I feel fat.

burberryqueen · 09/08/2013 15:49

omg yummy that is so nasty no way is size 10-12 fat.
leave the bastard.

OneLittleToddleTerror · 09/08/2013 16:03

libertychick that's my own experience on my personal fitness. I was walking a lot during my maternity. It takes me 30min to walk one way to the big supermarket and I do that very often. And then I did a lot of walking in the park. At the end of the year, I was unfit. I couldn't run up the 3 flight of stairs to our canteen without feeling short of breath. I also couldn't keep up with the intensity in a body combat class but then you'd say it's an artificial environment and not a real life situation.

If walking in a leisurely pace keeps someone in a level of fitness that she is happy with, then good on her. But I'm not happy with that level. Maybe your reasonable pace isn't leisurely. It's walking hard enough to raise the heart rate up, by either walking very fast, or climbing height. I go hiking too, and doing an all day walk is definitely very hard work. (I was sore for days after the round the isle of wight walk. You need to train up to it). Climbing hills for an hour is quite hard too.

I still maintain walking for an hour on a leisurely pace on the flat doesn't do much for me.

IrnBruTheNoo · 09/08/2013 16:05

yummy what are you with the loser for. If he cared for you, he wouldn't call you fat. That's really sad.

I call DH a fat bastard sometimes, but all in jest.

ithaka · 09/08/2013 16:08

I have a healthy BMI & I don't feel fat.

I am lucky that I have never had any major issues with my weight and I am fairly comfortable in my own skin - I am fit and strong and I am grateful for my healthy body.

I don't understand why I have been so lucky in this way - I hope I pass it on to my daughters.

Thumbwitch · 09/08/2013 16:14

OneLittleToddler - I agree that walking at a leisurely pace is not much use, you need to be going at a brisk pace to get much benefit from walking. I always walk briskly, can't help it, and get myself out of breath (at the moment) from so doing. Must do it more often!

absentmindeddooooodles · 09/08/2013 16:19

I don't feel fat, but am still not happy with my body. I'm 5.9" and weigh about 9 1/2 stone. I'm small frames, with scrawny little arms, no boobs but wide hips and chunky thighs and bumm. I have no problem whatsoever with bum and general wideness of hips etc, but my belly does bother me.

Ds is 2.5 and the muscles in my stomach ripped when I was pg, making it impossible to get my tummy back to how it was or anything like. I wear size 10 trousers and 8 top but still hate the bulge over the band.

Being quite tall I find I feel big anyway. I never ever talk about losing weight in RL, as like others have said, at a size 10, I am not fat, but it genuinely does bother me.

I exercise by walking the dog a lot, and taking D's out and having a good runaround etc. I don't drive so am constantly walking. I eat healthily ( although slightly addicted to pasta) but nothing I seem to do will make me feel better about my stomach.

I think society and the way women are seen has a lot to do with this issue for most people. But I can safely say, that my issue is just being able to be comfy in a pair of jeans and a T-shirt. ( and not having my belly melt onto the bed when I lie on my side! Haha

GrandPoohBah · 09/08/2013 16:32

I'm a bit fat. I'm 5'6" and a size 16 (down from an 18-20 pre-pregnancy). Breast feeding and cutting out booze when I was pregnant have shifted some of my excess weight. The thing is, I don't care. I'm all tits and arse (I'm spilling out of a 36J bra) and although my stomach could do with some work, I had a baby 8 months ago, so... Meh. My DH still makes it obvious he finds me attractive so that's fine.

I was a size 8 when I was 18. I wasn't happier, in fact I was much less happy. And because I have an hourglass figure I'll look like a weeble in skinny jeans whatever size I am, so I just don't wear them. Simples.

GrandPoohBah · 09/08/2013 16:36

Oh, but I am hideously unfit which is a bit of a worry. I should do something about that.

KitCat26 · 09/08/2013 16:37

No, I don't feel fat. I am 9st 9 and 5ft 5.

But I weighed 12st 18mths ago. I was pretty thin (around the 9st mark) until I had children, then the weight piled and stayed on. It was a bit of a shock tbh. Many things motivated me to finally lose weight and I set myself the target of 9st 5lb.

I'm pretty happy as I am now so I've stopped the dieting (enjoy the exercise though).

everlong · 09/08/2013 16:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Talkinpeace · 09/08/2013 16:45

KitCat26
I'm pretty happy as I am now so I've stopped the dieting
that is such a scary phrase.

You cannot go back to eating how you ate before, you have to eat only what your new slim body needs.
That was the whole point of the programme on BBC2 last night
people "diet" and then stop.
Whereas you need to change what you eat to fit with being a slimmer person.

Weightwatchers / Slimming World / Atkins / Dukan and Slimfast would all go bust if people realised that fact.

DeathMetalMum · 09/08/2013 16:54

No, I don't think I'm fat and never have. I am 5'1" and always between 6-10 without much effort just the way I am, though I have always walked a lot due to not driving. I have a 4 month old dd (and 2.5 yo) and didn't even feel fat during pg. I find it difficult to talk to other women about weight as it was never something that my mum/family ever really mentioned. So when people start talking about post pregnancy weight loss etc I have nothing to say. I also get uncomfatable.

It always used to confuse me when my friend similar size and shape to me would say she was fat - when she was far from it. Not sure why I think so differently to a lot of other women.

AngryFeet · 09/08/2013 17:00

My parents are now in their 60's and have a large group of friends. The people with the health problems are the very fat people and the very thin people. The size 12-14 ladies for example are generally ok. The size 8's seem to have a lot of issues with their bones and when they get ill (cancer for example) seem to struggle more to recover. It might just be a weird coincidence but I think the middle ground is healthiest.

MrsO27 · 09/08/2013 17:07

Yes, I'm 29 weeks pregnant. It's all going on my thighs! :(

VelvetSpoon · 09/08/2013 17:22

I am fat, I am 5'6, weigh 14.5 stone and am a size 16. My BMI is shocking.

But, I have lost nearly 3 stone in the last 15 weeks. When I tell people I still have another 3.5 stone to lose to get to normal BMI they are astonished.

I don't hate how I look. I never have, not even when I weighed 4 stone more than I do now. I am losing weight to be fitter, and so I can buy and wear the clothes I want to.

I do think there are always people ready to point the finger, to blame everything on your size. I have been told by many people (male and female) the reason I'm single is because I'm fat. Oddly, most of the men who have been rude about my size are fat themselves (like one who said he couldn't date a woman my size as size 12 was his 'limit'.... yet is now with a woman who is at least a size 22!). The last man I dated was very slim, but loved my figure, and would never accept I was fat or needed to lose weight. Which is as it should be.

Beastofburden · 09/08/2013 18:13

Balloon slayer- there has to be some justice, eventually... :)

RonaldMcDonald · 09/08/2013 18:23

I was always a lank
Until this year I was constantly vigilant over what I ate and fluctuated 10lbs from everyday steady of 10 st to giant chubster at 10 10
BUT
My chubster is ONLY about 10st 10 and I'm now 5ft 9.5 (used to be 5ft 10???) so really I'm not ever a porker.

I got a grip and have stopped worrying and dieting every spring etc like a loon. the weight is the same but with no worry and denying.
all those wasted years fs

solveproblem · 09/08/2013 18:29

Depends on what moo I'm in and what I'm wearing. Some says I feel awfully fat and other days I feel ok.

I'm 5'10, BMI 25 and a size 14.

Talkinpeace · 09/08/2013 18:51

Have a look at the pictures on this site ....
www.cockeyed.com/photos/bodies/heightweight.html
some of the people look good in their skin,
others do not
and its actually about "tone" - ie fitness not flabbiness
and self esteem.

My old sleb friend looks much much better now that she has put some weight back on than she did "slim"
OK she was a bit heavy for a while, but last photos I saw of her on digital spy shes around a size 14 and looks FAB