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Original poster

Some slapper at dh's work fancies him and is making lewd comments.....

96 replies

Northerner · 14/05/2006 12:27

Can't post what she does or says because it is vile. Dh is very honest so that's why he tells me.

He won't report it because 'he can handle it' and I guess men just don't do they?

I am so mad because I think she is totally crossing the line and part of me wants to scratch her eyes out.

I don't know her, have never met her so not really anything I can do.

Just wanted to vent really, what type of women must she be to behave like this towards a married man?

OP posts:

spidermama · 14/05/2006 21:55

I'm afraid I'd have to go in and have a little word with her and, well, basically threaten her.

I'm not very grown up like that.

Skribble · 14/05/2006 21:59

I think you are playing with fire by trying to have it out with her TBH.

galaxy · 14/05/2006 22:14

Good for dh for telling you and you know you have nothing to worry about because you are beautiful. NOt read the whole thread as lap-top battery's about to die but personally, I'd help dh to come up with some really caustic let down that he can say to her next time she comes onto him.

dh had some teenager lusting after him a couple of years back and he was quite upset about it but in the end it died a death when she realised he wasn't interested and moved onto her next victim.

fairyjay · 14/05/2006 22:20

Love your ideas Daisy!!!

Skribble · 14/05/2006 22:21

Oh I give up being sensible .

Tortington · 14/05/2006 22:28

i personally wouldnt lower myself to speaking to her. i would tell my dh that he either had to
a) fuck her and have done
b) sort it out becuase i find it offensive and hurtful
c) dont mention it again if she does it and hes to shit scared to do anything about it becuase he's a weak cocksucking fat shit for brains who likes it really - and if he think i am going to get jealous i'm not becuase i am not his fucking keeper he is free to leave at any fucking point - do you see a fucking key? to a magic lock?
no? then shut the fuck up about it you lilly livered son of a fucking bitch.

the choice is his.

Daisyb00 · 14/05/2006 22:32

Thanks fairyjay!
Agree with galaxy, it's hard but you have to act the better person if you can. She will get bored and move on.
Maybe the dp of the next man she targets won't be quite so understanding....

Try and feel a bit sorry for her - Real men don't appreciate a woman with a mattress strapped to her back. They like a bit of a challenge (so I'm told!!) she's just embarrassing herself.

Daisyb00 · 14/05/2006 22:35

....Alternatively, there's always Custardo's point C to consider....

harpsichordcarrier · 14/05/2006 22:36

would you really spidermama?
i didn't have you down as the threatening sort

Mytwopenceworth · 15/05/2006 09:57

you say your dh laughs it off, tells her he is happily married etc. i would stop that for a start. whenever she makes any non-work related comment, I would advise him to not make any reply at all. not a word. stony faced, he should turn away. or he should respond with a work related thing, eg,
"come here big boy let me sit on you".

"have you mopped the floor yet?"

He should not reply to anything from her that is not part of his job. if she asks what his problem is, he should say "i find your sexual jokes tasteless and innapropriate"

he needs to show her total boredom and nothing else. i bet others will follow his lead!

themoon66 · 15/05/2006 10:00

If he works at the hospital and its NHS, he should be a member of Unison or some other union. He should definitely keep a note of each incident and then he can go for a sexual harrassment charge if he gets really fed up, or she starts getting nasty and twisting things around. He should mention it to his shop steward now, before things get worse, and also make the shop steward aware.

fullmoonfiend · 15/05/2006 16:03

joking aside, themoon and MTW have sensible ideas and I reckon a combination of the 2 is maybe the best answer - tho' maybe not as much fun as some of the other ideas :)

wannaBe1974 · 15/05/2006 18:52

be more devious than that, what kind of chef is she, i.e. is she the vegetable chef, desserts ... what part of the cooking is she responsible for?

If you can find out, then go down there for dinner, and whichever she is responsible for, so, if you know she does the salads for instance, then order a salad and put something in it, a large piece of plastic/dead insect/you get the picture, then go totally off on one at the management. then send some friends down to do the same, eventually the management will get fed up of her crappy cooking and sack her.

Earlybird · 15/05/2006 18:57

Haven't read all the replies, but don't think your husband needs to deal with this directly at all, and should not be expected to resolve it.

Tell him to complain to management in the strongest terms that her comments are inappropriate, is beyond a lighthearted joke, and is potentially sexual harrassment. Her behaviour is a liability to the company, and she needs to stop immediately. Let management deal with her, NOT you or your husband. At least that's what I'd do....

Daisyb00 · 15/05/2006 18:58

Wannabe, I think Northerner said 'lady' is a domestic, not a chef.

themoon66 · 16/05/2006 09:49

Can you imagine if it was the other way round?? A bloke would never get away with making comments like that to a woman at work in this day and age. She is way out of order and needs pulling up sharp by management.

heavenis · 16/05/2006 10:15

Your dh should tell her the STD clinic rang. Make sure there are a few people around when he tells her,and that it sounded urgent,something about them wanting to start treatment straight away.
I don't think he should just laugh it off,tell her that if she doesn't stop then he will put in a formal complaint.

hunkermunker · 16/05/2006 10:23

All of the "beat her up" "make rude comments" suggestions do is give her a false sense of power.

Agree with Snafu, HC and M2PW - this woman doesn't sound like she's worth bothering about, so don't bother.

And I'm always on the look-out for a crude put-down opportunity, remember? And I'm not averse to violence. I just don't think this woman is worthy of headspace.

supakids · 16/05/2006 10:23

She needs putting down!

plummymummy · 17/05/2006 20:06

What is it with hospitals and randy domestics? We've got one in our hospital and she's the hozzy bike (not that she's any worse than the shits who've had a go esp as most of em are married). Kitchen culture can be a bit macho so maybe dh feels he can't tell her where to get off, but also agree with custy in that he should either deal with it or not tell you about it. It puts you in a difficult position. Another idea is that you could manufacture a sticker and put "SOILED" on it, then get dh to put it on her back.

plummymummy · 17/05/2006 20:07

Just a thought, is it possible that she might have a mental health problem?

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