Sometimes I think that I'm just too ....

[Cottonbrain]

..... Willing to help mates out in a crises, always happy to drop everything to help them, do their ironing whilst they are pregnant, run them around, lend them money, and just always be there for them (after all that's what mates do, right?).

So why is it that I always feel let down by them/disappointed ?

[discuss]

Some people are givers, some people are takers, some people assume different roles in a friendship depending on the context and dynamics.

People trade in different currencies within friendships. I used to get really upset in situations like you describe, where I get walked over then the kindness is never reciprocated. But then realised that those people maybe valued friends who gave them exciting social opportunities or whatever, rather than the person who was there to help them when their car broke down. Other people value a phone call, others think it's amazing to be given some home baking, etc.

Often in a friendship people give the thing they themselves would value getting, but I've learned to accept that it might not mean as much to the person receiving it. Hope that makes sense!

I wouldn't do anyone's ironing or lend money tbh
Unless it was family