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Original poster

Does anyone remove their children from the religious bits at school?

277 replies

WigWamBam · 25/01/2006 11:15

I am Pagan (for want of a better description), and although I would like to bring dd up to have an understanding of world religions, I don't really intend to bring her up with any sort of God in our lives. When she is old enough to make up her own mind then that's fine, but she's only 4 at the moment.

I'm getting a bit concerned about the amount of overtly religious stuff that she's getting at school. It's not a faith school, just a bog standard ordinary state primary. As well as the daily prayer and so on, she's now telling me about other things that have been happening and it seems that twice a week they have visitors from local churches, and the indoctrination has started. Yesterday they were being taught about the promises that God makes to us, and at one point she was asked to make a promise to God. I have no problem with her learning about what some people believe God is and what they believe he does, but from what she tells me this is being presented as undisputed truth, and it makes me uneasy.

I've talked to her before about God and about what certain other religions believe, but from an angle that this is what some people believe, but Mummy and Daddy don't believe that. Now she's being told (by people she believes only teach things that are true) that God is categorically real, and that she has to make promises to him.

I considered taking her out of the religious aspects right from the start, but was assured that it was only a daily prayer ... which is obviously not the case. I'm now considering it again, but I'm not sure whether it would single her out as being different if she wasn't taking part.

I'm not interested in getting into a debate about religion, or whether I'm wrong to feel the way I feel; I just wondered if there's anyone out there who removes their child from the religious aspects, and what the upshot from it has been. I don't want my child taught that things we don't believe in are the truth, but then again I don't want her bullied if I take her away from it.

OP posts:
AnnieQ · 25/01/2006 18:09

Fair enough, moondog - although I can't see where you get all that from the OP, to be quite honest. I don't see WWB rejecting the mores of society, and I don't see how rejecting Christian teaching when you are not a Christian is wrong.

I think at least one person here has missed the point that WWB's dd is NOT at a Christian school - strikes me that one or two people have thought she has, and is picking and chosing the bits she wants.

tallulah · 25/01/2006 18:11

I find this whole thread very sad. I thought we lived in a Christian country. My teenagers have been asking to be removed from RE because they don't find it relevant (far too much emphasis on all other religions) and I am seriously considering it.

My DD was taught- as an absolute truth at primary- that the Anglo-Saxons lived in holes in the ground. As I was then in the middle of a degree in early and medieval history I was horrified to find they were being taught this kind of crap which had been discredited many years before. I told DD the updated version and she went in and told the teacher that she didn't know what she was talking about (didn't expect her to repeat it!)

My kids were also taught- as truth- that people need to eat meat for health. As they were raised vegetarian from birth they found this very odd.

Kids will always be taught something at school that conflicts with their parents beliefs and values. Only way to avoid it is to home-ed.

mummytosteven · 25/01/2006 18:14

I understand why you feel that the religious teaching is overstepping the boundaries, but I think no harm in exposing her to it, discussing your views with her, and letting her form her own opinion as she gets older and develops more criticial faculties.

SoupDragon · 25/01/2006 18:14

I think we now live in a multi-cultural country actually. We should be accepting of other beliefs and learn about them - what we choose to actually believe in is our personal choice.

That's not to say I agree with the "happy holidays" "don't call it Christmas" type behaviour at all.

PeachyClair · 25/01/2006 18:17

'Kids will always be taught something at school that conflicts with their parents beliefs and values.'

True enough, but when your wants to be a palaeontologist kid is taught that Darwin was wrong, you have to take steps.

Other religions ARE relevant to your kids life, unless they are planning on living on a Chrsitian island somewhere with no Jewish (dietary law) Sikh (dress code) or other people.
My understanding of Chrsitianity is that it preaches tolerance, and tolerance involves being educated in other peoples existences and religions. This is a multicultural society.

Aloha · 25/01/2006 18:48

Oh for heavens sake Moondog. Not all of us are superstitious, and some of us resent our children being taught that superstition is truth in state schools. Just because you reject the supernatural does NOT mean you reject society. What a ridiculous and childish thing to say.

Aloha · 25/01/2006 18:50

And I absolutely don't see why children should be taught that things that are absolutely and always simply matters of opinion/belief are fact.

Enid · 25/01/2006 18:52

god you lot get soooooooooooo worked up over this

haven't we done this millions of times before?

didn't all the white middle class women on here go to schools where you sang hymns, had carol services, said prayers occasionally? And what a disparate bunch we are now.

It doesn't matter

Aloha · 25/01/2006 18:57

If it really doesn't matter, then why do the churches so desperately hang on to their influence in government policy on schools then?

Enid · 25/01/2006 18:59

oh I dont know aloha

I heard a brilliant quote the other day which I have been saving especially for you
'he clung on to his atheism like a religious fanatic'

cod · 25/01/2006 18:59

Message withdrawn

Enid · 25/01/2006 18:59

if it makes it any better that was supposed to be
, not,

Aloha · 25/01/2006 19:00

When it comes to the rational v the irrational, I honestly can't see why anyone finds it hard to understand why some people prefer the former.

Enid · 25/01/2006 19:01

in your opinion

hercules · 25/01/2006 19:01

I am an RE teacher and refuse to participate in collective worship in my school. I never teach religion as the truth but as a set of beliefs some people believe in and with many different levels of belief and commitment. I struggle at times with the learning from religion aspect and feel that there are thousands of ways kids can consider morals without using a religious belief/story.

Aloha · 25/01/2006 19:03

Yeah, big man in sky, world churned into being in big butterchurn, gods that are half-cats, gods who live on the top of big mountains and rape people in the form of swans, Gods who turn people into pillars of salt...all completely rational and sensible.

cod · 25/01/2006 19:04

Message withdrawn

Aloha · 25/01/2006 19:05

I don't. And actually, lots of religious people believe in them. Certainly not the prerogative of atheists. Far from it. I would guess it's quite the other way round.

noddyholder · 25/01/2006 19:15

spidermama totally agree sometimes we are all too rigid.Churches are beautiful often historic places with large groups of people singing and having a good time!It is up to the individual what they take from it which sometimes is nothing but it is worth being open to everything

Aloha · 25/01/2006 20:01

I actually agree with churches being beautiful. Not so sure the people in them are having a great time though.
Am extremely irritable and tetchy today for some reason, so will leave this thread before my blood pressure goes up any more!

Enid · 25/01/2006 20:02

lol

feeling miserable and tetchy then a thread like this comes up aloha? must be manna from heaven

Spidermama · 25/01/2006 20:18

Great quote Enid. My father clings to his atheism 'like a religeous fanatic'.

HRHQueenOfQuelNoel · 25/01/2006 20:28

Haven't read the thread - however I don't think you're wrong at all for feeling the way you do.

If my DS1's school ever have a trip to a mosque I will ask for DS1 not to go - purely because I believe that by him being asked to remove his shoes he's 'believing' a part of their belief that you have to keep it clean for prayer. May sound extreme but that's the way I feel. I also asked that he wasn't directly involved in any of their celebrations of Diwali, he learned about it, but didn't actually do any of the stuff when some Hindu's came in last term - he wasn't the only one on this front (CoE school).

HRHQueenOfQuelNoel · 25/01/2006 20:32

oh and my beliefs are not a "superstition" and I actually take offence to that comment. It's a faith that I have - I'm actually not superstitious in the silghtest (just as well as today I've walked under a ladder, had a black cat cross my path and managed to smash a mirror LOL - oh and lets not forget the salt that missed the salt shaker ) - actually I've had a good day honest!

Aloha · 25/01/2006 20:32

God no Enid, if my teeth get any more clenched they will be ground into powder. I might vent by shouting at big brother. Have just shouted 'Fuck off! Just fuck right off you stupid bitch and put me through to a person!' to an automated voice on the La Redoute site. 'I'm sorry. I didn't quite understand that?' Aaaargh.