Do you ever feel like you are living a compromise??

[Beetrootfultoyourself]

Just wondererd?
Feeling a bit shite.

Entered the realms of fantasy years ago when I thought I could go back to work part-time and still get the interesting jobs. Oh, and that the people I work with wouldn't continually make comments about sitting around on my days off watching Richard & Judy - as if.
Oh dear, starting to sound bitter & twisted now, think I'll go back to the fantasy life.

A Samaritan! Fantastic. My dad used to be a Samaritan and I know that, whilst he found it very fulfilling, it was very draining and demanding at times. Well done you.

Have you thought about taking a counselling course?

I felt like I was yesterday, but not today, probably will again tomorrow.

I often find myself thinking 'When this as happened' or 'when this is done, I will feel better', but often dont get there without something else cropping up that pisses me off.

I dont like January though.

but surely life is a compromise -- by the very nature of other people being around, we have to make compromises to ensure that other people's feelings are taken into account and that your needs can never be the centre of the world...

the big thing about compromise is we have to make some... it what they are and how they make us feel that matters... if you feel you are going too far, then you need to make changes to your life... whilst accepting there are limitations on how we run our lives that are external and quite often outside our control (health, finances, commitments)

I would take a bit of time to look at where you feel most compromised and unhappy and make some changes... I totally recommend the Life Audit book for assisting in this...

Agree mancmum

I think everyone lives a compromise to a certain extent - and believe me, you don't have to be a mum to feel like this

Freckle, considered itmany times butnot actually done anything about it...My mum is one so i have always avoided it.

Do you have negative connotations wrt your mother being one? I know that being a Samaritan isn't counselling per se, but you have to be a very good listener which is an important part of counselling too. It might be another way to earn money which fits around your other family commitments and leaves you free to do your other job too.

Message withdrawn

Freckel, I guess i do have negitvie connotatios.. Not sure where to go to look for counselling courses. there are so many different ones. It is certainly something I am interested in.

Beetroot,I will CAT you. Thanks

I've been lurking on this thread, beetroot, and thinking about it. I feel a bit shit at the moment too and thinking about the compromises I have made. I know some of you feel you have given up some or all of your career to look after children, while your partner brings in most of the money. Well from my point of view the grass isn't greener on the other side - from my twenties I've always had to work full time, as my husbands' various careers have never paid enough to support us. I've always been the main breadwinner, rarely being able to take a back seat, always the one who tries to balance the books. I am so sick of that pressure - true that neccessity has made me work, and I now have a career I really like, even if it doesn't pay a super salary, but it's never been easy.

And as this year begins, I feel I have very little control over my future - our team is being amalgamated with a bigger one and I do not know exactly where I fit in or how my job will change. And I have just heard this week that my husband's father may be very ill (waiting for hospital test results). This could well bring forward or put back plans of ours to move to Devon. It will be a decision my husband and his parents will have more say in than me, I think. I'll just tag along - so I guess that's the compromise I'll be making.

Sorry for hijack. I hope your search for more career openings pays off soon, beetroot. I do agree with whoever said you should see this as an interulde in your wonderful journey through life. You strike me as the sort of person who can spot opportunities very quickly. I am sure something you like will come your way.

Tigermoth - I could have written your post! I am the breadwinner, and am tired of the pressure of feeling that I am the one 'holding it all together'. It never used to bother me, but then we moved (much bigger mortgage) and had ds. Now I feel I have no option but to carry on doing what I am doing and that, combined with a very bad career desicion, makes me very stressed. I KNOW there are options (downsize the house for example) but its more than simply that. Rambling a bit....