Do you ever feel like you are living a compromise??

[Beetrootfultoyourself]

Just wondererd?
Feeling a bit shite.

Pollyanna, i think I might really enjoy doing something else once I have taken the plunge. I do not enjoy the waiting and waiting for jobs.

It's so hard to be hard on them when they are perfect in every other way
I do not work and am fortunate - but feel that if I did work my value might go up you know.
Its hard to evalate oneself by oneself as we rely on other people to make us valuable much of the time - work/school/uni etc

YOu are so right Piffle..

Someone told me recently that most mums juggle 3 balls, work, personal/emotional life, family/kids. 2 were made of glass, only one was made of rubber (work) so if you can't keep them all spinning drop the one that bounces, you can always catch it again later.

Well as I have nto got a job I am going out for Lunch! And will ask my teacher friend to help me fill in my application forms...

It is the 'current teaching job' that is causing me problems oh and the 'past teaching job'

love it berries...lets hope it does bounce ..isn't there always someone younger to grab it ??

A perfect discription, Berries. Echos how I feel, (although unfortunately my carrer isn't one that is particularly easy to pick up after a long abscence. I am the opposite of you Plooyanna, although we are moving out of London it is exactly what I want to do.

Yes, everyday and TBH at the moment it's getting me down too! We have just moved from Venice, which I loved, had a great job, a great house, DS was in a fab school, DH earned a fortune but worked mega hours so he decided (well OK I agreed to it aswell) to move to Brazil (he is Brazilian BTW)so he could work less hours and see more of DS. What has happened? I have no job, no friends, not that good at the language, have a crp house (whilst trying to find something better but failing so far), DS is bored to tears as he has no friends either (but just got him int summer school yesterday so that should help), DH is earning about a quarter of the pay and still working mega hours. And it's the bl*dy rainy season and boy does it rain here! Things can only get better!!

Sorry I meant Pollyanna (must preview). .

Is it B'Ed hons? B'ed hons? BED Hons? Bed Hons?

Pollyanna, have not got time to post now but do cat me if you want.

Oh gawd Albert!

Its scary when you do something different from what you have always done, even more so when you have taken the focus of that particularly aspect of your life for a while.

I certainly wouldnt think you are a failure because you have put your family before yourself.

And no need for the apology for the private ed comment - you shouldnt apologise for doing what you consider the best option for your family.

I dont know much about what it is you do, but nonetheless, dont feel bad for now wanting something for yourself.

i don't just feel, i AM living one.

I think it is B.Ed.Hons.

I definitely live a life of compromise but hope it won't always be like this. I not only gave up my career to have my children but also so that DH could start his. He has done incredibly well and is very successful but I haven't moved on in that sense at all. Once again a friend has offered me freelance work and, pathetic though it is to admit, I have lost all confidence in my ability to do it. It would be difficult to fit it in but although we manage financially at the moment DD will start secondary in 2007 and will be going private so the extra money would be more than welcome. Life is too short for regrets though and I have made these decisions for myself. Thought Berries quote was very apt.

Have a feeling that the work ball may bounce off at a bit of a tangent. I work in IT so do need to keep skills up if possible, but have a contract to do 3 days a month at the mo so that should keep me ticking over. Had horrendously complicated year last year and needed to do something as homelife was going down the pan.
It is tricky though as I actually love my job and like nothing better than to get really stuck into a good bit of problem solving. I'm going to use the next 3 months to get our homelife back on track & sort out other options. If I had the ideal life I would be able to work full time in a challenging job, the children would be happy & fulfilled at school, and then go into cold storage when it finished until I got home & could talk intelligently about their day and help them with their homework (which they would do enthusiastically and easily), then I would cook a gourmet meal ready for dh when he gets home, which he would eat (and complement me extravagently on) whilst we discussed our day. Children would then obligingly put themselves to bed without fighting over the toothpaste and fall asleep immediately, so dh & I could make passionate love for hours (still full of energy after our perfect day). We would the both fall asleep for at least 8 - 9 hours, wake up refreshed and energetic for the next day. Guess I'll have to get used to compromise

Oh, and I'd also figure out when to use a full stop instead of a comma!

Berries - suspect you would be working on a 30 hour day to achieve your ideal!

At least! What I really need is a button to switch off some parts of my life so I can concentrate on other things without feeling guilty (or feeling like I'm missing out). Oh, forgot to add that we would go away for at least a 4 week break every summer, to somewhere hot, sunny and cultured (and the 2 week skiing trip in the winter of course!)

Ah yes, the guilt...

How can one not live a compromise when there's children involved

it is only possible to not compromise if you have no responsibilities .. children, mortgage, bills, debts .. otherwise life is compromise

the question is have you compromised too much?

Berries, you've forgotten to include your wildly active social life and your charitable work in that list.

Arf at berries' kids in cold storage. Mine fight over the toothpaste too. Why?

Lets not be unrealistic here - I may have to tone down my wild social life & charity work
Second thoughts - why not - I'm sure someone once said you CAN have it all. So I'll add in Friday nights socialising with witty & enthusiastic friends & Saturday nights out clubbing with dh, where he miraculously turns into a fantastic dancer & I don't look 15 yrs older than everyone else there! Oh, and every alcoholic drink makes you lose 2lb and fails to give you a hangover.

Berries - you have now entered the realms of fantasy.