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Original poster

The birth aside....landmarks that make you feel like a "real" mother?

157 replies

champagnesupernova · 17/11/2011 11:01

Mate on Facebook said that she felt like a real mum, now that she had cleaned up proper sick (!)
I have just sewn on my first name-tape and that really felt like a landmark moment...
What are yours?

OP posts:
MarriedToTheGrinch · 17/11/2011 18:02

when they fall over and hurt themselves and someone else picks them up but they hold their arms out for you.

when they are ill because only mum will do, I know that they are better when they are happy for DH to stay off work to look after them.

You only want your mum when you are ill.

NoOnesGoingToEatYourEyes · 17/11/2011 18:06

My cousin commented this in wonder after the following conversation between me and DS.

Me: Have you done a poo?
DS: NO! You not see my nappy!
Me: I think you have.

Cousin: Eyes! You're just like a real Mum now!

SjuperWolef · 17/11/2011 18:11

some of these are making me well up, must be the hormones from having boypup 2 weeks ago left over

for me, it was the first time i had to make mini a doctors appt, she was up a fair bit but saying ''an appointment for my daughter '' just felt so unbelievably 'grown up'

also when she took her first baby fever fit and i had to phone an ambulance, the feeling of utter panic and shouting at the paramedics to see to her instead of commenting on my decorating

aStarInStrangeways · 17/11/2011 18:13

being able to go places and do stuff with baby and toddler and their accompanying detritus (pram, scooter, nappies, change of pants, random trains, drinks, snacks) AND actually get everything done, have a reasonably good time and get home with everyone and everyone you started out with Grin

I say this because when pregnant with DD (DC2) I was terrified that I wouldn't be able to manage it. But I do.

BikeRunSki · 17/11/2011 18:14

Taking DS to A&E
Second sewing on name tapes - buying shoes too
Looking at schools

ChristinedePizanne · 17/11/2011 18:19

When DS was in hospital at 9 months and they asked me for my permission to insert a nasal-gastric tube :(

Sorry, that's brought the thread down a bit but it was the first time it hit me that I had absolute responsibility. He is nearly 5 now and absolutely fine though so there is a happy ending :)

JumpJockey · 17/11/2011 18:19

First time playing hairdressers so as not to freak child out that you're actually going at them with a nit comb (I say having done this two nights ago...)

AllGoodNamesGone · 18/11/2011 00:11

Being wheeled up to postnatal ward with him in my arms. As a nurse I had seen so many women going past in corridors or lifts with their babies and been more than a little envious so I was ecstatic it was finally me!!

Lifting them up at the postbox so they could post the letter.

Letting them press the button at pedestrian crossings and waiting for the green man even when the road is completely empty!

Filling up at the nativity play. And making the costume for it.

Oh and mortifying my sister by smelling DS1 nappy in public to find out if he had done a poo - something I had sworn I would never do as it looks so revolting when someone else does it!

funnyperson · 18/11/2011 00:30

when we measured DS and realised he was taller than me!

BalloonSlayer · 18/11/2011 07:47
  • having an afternoon to myself and cooking stuff for the DCs and have them coming in saying "Oooh! Can I smell . . . ?"
  • being told by DS1 that my version of a particular dish is much better than another one (Disclaimer: my culinary rival was only the school dinners version. But still.)
  • all getting soaked in the rain, arriving home and getting all the coats on the radiators, dry clothes for everyone and the heating on
  • having a long, calm, talk [last night] with child who had done something very wrong. Words and phrases employed include "disappointed," "what did you think would happen?" and "I will always love you."
  • being able to put lipstick on top lip only and by Les Dawson-style contortion of mouth manage to spread it completely evenly over bottom lip as well (can't do this yet, but my Mum always did it, so to me it is THE yardstick of Real Motherliness).
fishandlilacs · 18/11/2011 08:25

I was sat in the hospital having just been released 6 days after traumatic c section birth with dd. She was in her car seat on the floor DH had gone to bring the car closer to the hospital. I was wide eyed with terror, chewing my fingers to the bone and totally overwhelmed and in tears. (didn't know it then but I went on to have bad PND) a very lovely lady came up and sat beside me and "said are you ok?" I gibbered at her a bit trying to explain i wasn't on my own and DH was coming to get me. She just looked at me solemnly and said, "none of this will matter in a few months time you know-youre a beautiful mummy to a beautiful daughter"

TettyBingleJellsLouBar · 18/11/2011 08:38

Had a moment like this last night that made me feel like a real mummy.

DD1 (3yr5mo) has started to have really vivid wierd dreams nearly every night. Sometimes she cries out in her sleep, sometimes she wakes and shouts for me. Last night she called for me, I went in and she just wanted a cuddle and to touch my skin I think. I lent over her bed and cuddled her and she put her hand to my neck and just said she was a bit scared. Sad

Love being needed like that. I always say the same thing as she seems to respond the best to it. "It's just a silly story in your head DD" and she seems happy with that and rolled over and went back to sleep with her rabbit.

nenevomito · 18/11/2011 08:46

When I woke up at 7am and thought "what a nice lie-in".

pallymama · 18/11/2011 09:00

The first time DD was ill. She's usually a Daddy's girl, but when ill, she just wants Mummy. :)

fishandlilacs - I was managing quite nicely not to well up, but you post finished me off! What a lovely thing for her to have said.

JugglingWithGoldandMyrhh · 18/11/2011 09:04

Seeing DD with her arm round DSs neck as they both ran off together to go climbing at soft play, while I sat and had a coffee and read a good book. (x100 !)

( Something about having a peaceful moment to watch them when they couldn't see me ! And a sight I got very familiar with and always loved to see Smile )

Going for a coffee with my Mum in the park cafe (notice a Brew theme here ?!)
with my arms round the DCs as we went in and just turning to my Mum and saying "Here's two I made earlier !"

CMOTdibbler · 18/11/2011 09:04

Sewing on nametapes did it for me. That and my first trip to the chemists for worm tablets Smile

bananamam · 18/11/2011 10:03

First time DS was really sick......when you reach out to catch vomit without thinking...why do we do that?

First school drop off and parents evening.

I think most "firsts" have made me feel like a mum.

When dd came along I was well into mum mode....but really felt like hers when I was able to pop her elbow in myself. She is prone to her elbow pulling out of joint, and after to trips to minor accidents at hospital, I now know the technique!

kiteflying · 18/11/2011 10:11

When my DD started talking and one of the first things she said when she would wake up in the morning was "I love you so much Mummy" - like she had been waiting two years to be able to get that out. Just delicious.

openerofjars · 18/11/2011 10:15

When you have tears in your eyes reading these because they are TRUE, rather than thinking, "get a grip"!

Also when you manage to rinse out pooey pants without shouting or being sick. Even when you get poo up your fingernails.

And when your child runs up to you at pickup time at nursery, shouting "Mummmeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" in utter glee.

Merlion · 18/11/2011 10:17

DS (3) crying uncontrollably watching disney's Ugly Duckling because 'the Ugly Duckling's lost his Mummy' and dh having to bring him upstairs to see me to convince him that I hadn't disappeared too. (I was feeding dd at the time).

beanandspud · 18/11/2011 10:19

Phoning the doctors for an appointment for "my son" - it still feels odd.

Ditto the letters to "Parent/Guardian of..."

FetchezLaVache · 18/11/2011 10:22

Trying to make the dinner with a small person's arms wrapped firmly round my thigh.

sleepychunky · 18/11/2011 10:57

Definitely the sewing of name tapes - DS1 started school in September and I got complete flashbacks to all those summers 30 years ago watching my mum sitting on the sofa with her sewing box out.
Have booked the day off work for the nativity play next month and am convinced that will be another moment (already feeling teary just thinking about it, and I'm not normally the sentimental type).

wobblyweeble82 · 18/11/2011 11:00

I get that feeling when I'm making DS' packed lunch for school. Even though its the most tedious job in the world, it does make me feel like a proper mum. Also when I shine his shoes :)

wonderstuff · 18/11/2011 11:01

In hospital with DD - looking over at her and thinking I don't know who you are yet or what the future will bring, but I knew that I would move heaven and earth for her if I had to because I was her mum and no one else would be able to look after her as well as me. She has some deformaties and we had been told she might have special needs (thankfully she didn't) I was steeling myself for the battles ahead.