Dilemma...what would you do?

[crackingchristmascat]

Both dds go swimming on a sunday night.
Theres a girl in dd1s class whos about 6 who comes into the changing rooms on her own while her dad reads the newspaper outside.
She asked me to help her get dressed about 3 weeks ago and I sorted out her clothes for her and helped tug her socks/boots on.
Next week she says Can you help me get dried...so I did. Sort of shook the towel up and down her and tryed to encourage her to sort out her own clothes. She did some I did some.
This week I was talking to the swimming instructor for ages and when we went through to the changing area She said I couldnt find you..OH Gawd I thought.
I dried my dds hair under the hair dryer and this little girl didnt make any attempt ot sort herself or her clothes out. So I said things like Oh you need to get yourself dry, your freezing, youdd better get a move on or you will freeze to death etc etc and she didnt move, just stood there shivering.
I then move to where the clothes are get my dd dresses and tell her to sort hers out, she says she needs help. I put the stuff out in a row and said you need to get your dad to sort you out dont you...feeling mean but..
the nice part of me says Oh give her a hand...but not at the expense of my dd being wet/cold and hey her dads outside and theres no reason that he could be doing it.
What would you do?

I would pop a towel on her and stick my head out and tell her dad that his dd needed a hand!

I would mention it to the Dad (nicely) he may not know that she can't do it all herself.

Womens Changing rooms...

Isn't there a family changing room?

It's not your bloody job-a woman would never do this!

I would tell him.

Aren't there mens changing rooms?

Surely she should be more capable of getting herself sorted out than that. Even my 4yr old has to dress herself after swimming at school. Perhaps you or the instructor could have a word with her dad and say she struggles to get herself dressed and ready. Either he should be doing it or they should put her in clothing that is easy for her to do. He probably just assumes she is ok.

Definitely speak to the father. He may just have assumed that as his dd has always come out of the changing rooms dry and dressed that she can do it all by herself.

Do you know the family situation? My dad took over swimming lesson duty when my parents split - luckily I was old enough to sort myself out, but had I not been, he wouldn't have had a clue, because it had always been mum that did it before. I think talking to the dad is the best bet.

Yes there are but it would mean me getting her bag and her and lobbing her out in the corridor hoping that hes out there.
She has always got dirty knickers on, which means she cant wipe her own bum properly, so someone knows shes not THAT capable.

Is he able to watch the lesson ? Surely he knows when it has finished and can meet his dd in the other changing room ?

I'd tell her dad that she can't manage by herself and she needs help.

It's not your job to dry someone else's kid. If it were her mother, you wouldn't even think of it.

I'd certainly have a word, it's not your responsibility, although maybe he feels he can't take a 6 year old girl into a mens changing area.

Not sure if he does watch. Only time I see him is at the end when she runs out to him.
Someones putting a hairbrush and shampoo in her bag thinking/hoping thats being done but her hairs always in plaits and its not.
Will see if I can see him earlier next week.

Arrgghhhhhhhh.

I'd have a word with the Dad, and if nothing changed I'd probably continue to help the girl as I'd feel sorry for her...

Even whilst your own dd ds was standing there in the same frozen state?
Thats the dilemma really. If I help her get dressed my dd freezes, If I leave her to stand there till my dds done shes froze to the bone and by this time im thinking FGS someone should be doing this for her and its not me.

He can take her into the mens. Dp takes ours in when I dont.

Batters theres about 10 dads a session on the sunday session, they would need 10 assistants but all the other dads walk through, as I do, pick up the kids and take them into the mens and sort them out. He reads the paper while she struggles/asks me.

No im not particularly comfy with it BUT even if there was a peadophile in the changing rooms dps not going to let her out of his sight.

Seperate from the womens yes, No idea about inside, I expect so.

Erghh..never thought about that...no, theres only lessons on so there no willies. LOL