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How old was you when you had your first baby?

100 replies

maddysonsmomm · 26/10/2005 22:47

How old was everyone when they had their forst baby?
I was 20 years old, and even though im a 21 year old mom i still get ridiculed but young moms have been around since the beginning of time, so why is everyone so judgemental nowadays? i understand there are alot of careless too young moms, but some moms arnt! how old were you and did you get ridiculed made to feel uncomfortable because of your age or lifestyle?!

OP posts:
Mog · 27/10/2005 11:40

I'm not sure about the older mum/ lack of energy thing. I've kept very fit during my 20's and 30's and don't feel this lack of energy - or at least I don't think I feel that much more than anyone would with three children under five. My neice is unexpectedly pregnant at 22 andis having a more difficult pregnancy than I did. I wonder if us older mums feel knackered and put it down to age, when in fact all mums are knackered!
For me the scary thing is not what age I had babies, but what age I'll be when they are all at school, and then what age at secondary school. I sometimes wonder what kind of mum I would have been in my 20's as I am such a different person now - much more confident for one. It must make me a different mother.

milward · 27/10/2005 11:57

Just had ds4 & am an older mum! Have had people commenting on me being an older mum - I suppose similiar to that experienced by the young mums but with an older age bias. Things like - you must be calmer being an older mum???, it must be easier being an older mum???

Springchicken · 27/10/2005 12:09

19 (well 4 days off of being 20). am 21 now.
Didn't get ridiculed as such - got treated awfully by the midwives at my hospital and i think that had a lot to do with my age. I could tell by the look on their faces that they thought I was just another youngster, who'd had an 'accident', father had left, dealing with it on ym own etc, completely clueless that I had been with DP for 4.5 years at the time, lived together, owned our own home, owned 2 cars and very much planned and waiting for DD.

Make me sooooooo angry that young girls are pressumed to be useless and their children unwanted!

compo · 27/10/2005 12:44

29

ScreamEagle · 27/10/2005 12:50

21
23
25
32
34

puff · 27/10/2005 12:52

ds1 36

ds2 38

Would have liked them earlier but didn't meet the right man until I was 33.

It's ok now, but not fancying being ancient grandparents if our two follow us and have children in mid to late 30's. Hope we are still alive then!

chicca · 27/10/2005 12:55

30 -it was a great distraction being pregnant and turning 30.

compo · 27/10/2005 12:58

ScreamEagle, just out of interest - did you find it harder at 21 or 34?

Trickorflum · 27/10/2005 22:08

By the way if no one has already mentioned it (surely Senoreapostrophe - or whatever the name is has popped along).

I believe it should be 'How old were you when you had your first baby?'

Lel1972 · 27/10/2005 22:17

31 for my one and only, DD. hoping for no 2 next year when I'll be 34. Just the way it worked for us, I thought I would have started a bit earlier!

I work as a Registrar and I have to say that some (not all, before you 'older' mums shout at me!!) of the 19 year old mums who come in to register know more about what they're doing than the ones in their 40s! so I think it's really more about whether you feel ready rather than what other people think of as 'the norm'. just ignore them!!

moondog · 27/10/2005 22:22

I know a wman who is about to have her first-at 44.

For me 33 and 37 which felt exactly right,although I had got together with their father at 22.

allhallows · 27/10/2005 22:23

i were 37.

Goldfish · 27/10/2005 22:27

I have been with dh since I was 17, and had ds1 at 28 and ds 2 at 30. I was really lucky as fell both times immediately, after having the absolute time of my life in my 20s. Good job I didn't leave it too late though as I went through the menopause totally unexpectedly at 37.

FrightfullyPoshFloss · 27/10/2005 22:35

I was 23 and found that I had a lot of people shocked at it at work. People didn't seem to know what to say to me and lots would say 'But your so young!' And I wasn't really. Never wanted to be an older mum, and have to say that since DS was born no-one has had any such comments to make. Still undermined my confidence when I was nervously expecting though.

jenkel · 27/10/2005 23:28

34 with dd1
36 with dd2

started trying at 29 believe it or not and had to resort to IVF

1980cat · 27/10/2005 23:54

I was 2 days off my 23 birthday (that's one I'm never going to forget stuck in hosptal wishing I was home).
No-one ever treated me as a young mum but I come from an area famous for having the highest teenage pregnancy rate in Europe. That said there were only one or two people younger than me in ante-natal classes and even when I was in hosptal there were very few younger mums in.
I don't think being a young mum has any direct effect on your ability to be a parent I know people who had babies really young and are amazing parents and I know some older mums who, well, aren't.
It's more about maturity than the numbers on your birth certificate.

BudaBabe · 27/10/2005 23:55

37 - IVF baby

Hoping to try again soon and I am 41!

gingerbear · 27/10/2005 23:58

38

moondog · 28/10/2005 15:10

Oooh best of luck Budababe!

XXX

aloha · 28/10/2005 15:10

38

madmarchscare · 28/10/2005 15:13
  1. Older than my friends and average at AN.
madmarchscare · 28/10/2005 15:14

Actually, Im 32 now , I was 30 when DS was born.

heavenis · 31/10/2005 10:17

25 with ds1 (well 26 the day after he was born)
29 with ds2

NomDePlume · 31/10/2005 10:22

20+4 months.

Racers · 31/10/2005 11:26

31+ 7m my 32nd bd friday

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