other sahm's who dont earn a bean - does your dh give you a monthly allowance?

[nailpolish]

dh earns all the money in this house - i get the child benefit etc

he gave me a card for his account (we have seperate accounts) but now he wants to give me £300 to cover everything inc weekly shop

i think i can just about manage it, with bus fares, bits and bobs, and he says if i need extra (like shoes for the girls) i can just use his account card

i think the main reason he wants to do this is so he can manage bills etc better (hes a panicker about running out of money before bills are paid)

what does everyone else do please

We have a food budget, I buy things for ds (clothes, toys etc.) out of the child allowance, and I also get £25 a week just for me which I can do what I like with. It's not an "allowance", it's just how much money is left over each week when we have paid for everything else. Dp also gets £25 in his account. I felt it was very important for me to have some no-strings money that I did not have to account for. However out of that money I pay for all my clothes, toiletries, haircuts, trips out, etc. and my share of birthday presents for friends and family.

Recently I have been earning a small amount myself as well so I also contribute to the household expenses, but still get my own money from dp too.

just become a sahm and I manage all the money i decide how much dh gets and how much i get, how much we save, what we can spend etc - so i give him an ALLowance!

Way to go albosmum!

just had a big discussion with dh about financial situation and made him tell me the whole lowdown on why we have no money. Wrote down exactly what we are paying out monthly and what is coming in. have talked him into opening a new joint account where all household( bills grocery)money will go in. He pays the mortgage straight out of his salary. We now will both have access to the bills/ grocery account- boy i feel better. All of this is thanks to this thread. has only taken 5 years of marriage to set him straight!
However the bottom line is there is £20 each month that equates to disposable income. This really frightened dh, but came as no surprise to me. I am so glad we did this as now he understands that his impulse purchases are something we just can't afford.
Only thing to stress about is Christmas. do you think nanybody would notice if i didn't send cards this year...

Good for you Sorrel.

I'm the only earner. Every month enough money for all the shopping and bills goes into our joint account. On top of that dh gets an allowance (known as 'beer money' in our house), which equates to about half of what is left over. which is his to do with exactly as he pleases. Sometimes he uses it for the pub and sometimes it ends up being used for family stuff like shoes for the sluglet. I really believe it's important for each partner to have some no-strings money to call their own.

I work but only a few hours a week and earn about £200 a month which pays for dd nursery fees, her dance classes etc and treats.

Dp then gives me about £900 a month and I get maintenance of £10 a month. Dp pays the mortgage, out insurances and pensions etc, council tax, car related bills, his student loan out of his money which leaves him with his money, which he can spend on what he wants.

Out of my money I pay out about £300 a month in bills. I then have about £600 a month for food shopping and buying dd clothes and anything I will want. I am an absolute nightmare with money so dp sometimes has to help out with food shopping.

I don't see it as degrading although I don't really think of it as an allowance, it is just our income as a household unit, and as part of that unit I am entitled to a share of it. If I want something special I try not to go to dp as I do find that a bit belittling epecially as I was a single Mum before I met dp so can be independent in quite a prickly way. It is further complicated in our situation as dd is not dp's ,and her father pays token maintenance so dp works long hours to support dd and my decision to stay at home with her. I therefore feel awqard asking for more money to buy something frivolous especially as dp rarely spends anything on himself. For example I have just bought some new clothes so I worked an extra shift at work, catered a party and sold some bits on ebay.

Job well done Sorrel, nah just leave the crimbo cards, something along the lines of :I'm sure I posted all the card at once I really can't understand why you didn't get yours; will do the trick and you will have saved a good couple of quid too!

We just share the money and I use what I need. I know how much we have got and what I have to spend do it works really well.