Can anyone help me write a reply to my neighbours snotty letter ?

[mrspink27]

hope someone can come up with a few witty sentences to reply to a note my neighbour posted through the door yesterday.

Basically, we are the first house on our street and have 5 lots of neighbours boundarys along the garden fence. Most of these are older folk.
Along one side of our garden we have a hedge, conifer and laurel, which we cut regularly every year, without fail, both sides and the top. Our house is slightly higher than our neighbours as we are on a bit of a slope and therefore the hedge is higher on our neighbours side than ours, but if we cut it down much lower then it wouldnt act as a screen for us and the busy road in front of the neighbours houses.

Sorry if tmi!

Anyway, the gardener chap came last friday afternoon and made a start on the hedge. Unfortunately he could only stay 3 hours and then it started raining so he had to stop anyway. He will return in 10 days when he has another gap in his schedule (he is an off duty fireman.)

Yesterday we had a note put through our door which reads
"Dear neighbour, when I heard and saw you were having your hedge trimmed yesterday I had high hopes of seeing some sky from kitchen window once again. I hope it was rain stopped play and not that it was forgotten that a hedge has 2 sides and becomes quite threatening from this side. I sincerely hope to hear from you in the future."

Really want to write a witty note back... but wit escapes me...

What should i write???!!!

Don't get me started on so-called mild mannered old people!
During a visit to Preston to see dh's parents, we were walking through the market when this little old man stops us and starts papping on about what a shame it is for 2 little girls he knows with cancer. We stop out of politeness and nod our agreements. He then launches into a racist tyrade, saying the money we spend on "them" pointing at a mortified Indian lady should be spent on children with cancer, "our" children. He didn't fight in the war to let "those" bastards in, personally he would see them all lined up against a wall and shot, and he would do the shooting! At this point we walked briskly off, but dd was quite upset asking why he was shouting and swearing at us and why does he want to shoot that lady?

Grumpy old gits more like!

I take it all back - your neighbours are barking mad!

Trim it into a topiary V sign. Some people are just so rude! To rant on at you whilst you are actually trimming the hedge!!

I have an oak in the garden, I'm not allowed to cut it at all because it has a preservation order on it. Well I am allowed to get it the occasional trim but even then I worry the neighbours will report me It is currently raining leaves all over the neighbourhood with all the others round here ! My friendly older neighbour suddenly had a bad day and had a go at my father for parking perfectly legally outside his house. Now my dad looks for parking elsewhere first as he was so scared by this rant. So I know all about perfectly nice neighbours turning into ranting banshies. I'm going to have to talk to hime soon about replacing the fence between us, I only started looking into it because he raised the matter and he says he cant remember that conversation now [worry]

I feel for your hedge problem!

Agree your neighbours are loony bonkers. I think you should move - if you stay there, YOU will be like that when you're old

Parking....hmm...smoky neighbour parks her car outside her house rather than on her drive so that nobody else can park there. She's bloody awful, reminds me of Grotbags from Emu's world.

When her son is living with her (stays six months then they have a row and he goes elsewhere but always comes back), she parks it on the drive so he can use the space outside the house. He will actually knock on our door if there is another car parked in the space when he gets home. Last week he knocked at 9.30pm, very aggressively - the car in "his" space had nothing to do with us, so he left with his (I suspect, rather small) tail between his legs.

I mean, what's the deal with that? You don't own the space outside your house, do you? And it seems especially cheeky as it isn't even his house, but his mother's

mogwai,I would park there specifically to annoy him I'm afraid.
We had this do with our neighbours years ago and i checked with the police to be absolutely sure.It's public-anyone can park there.

I would tell the Neighbour that the Gardener has only cut half as that's what you've paid for, if she wants the other half cut she will half to pay her share No, i agree being nice tends to be the best way forward, it's hard to be horrible to some one who is nice to you.

Parking - nightmare, my neighbours park over our drive when we are parked on it - how rude.

mogwai - I know it's v annoying but reminds me of a neighbour opposite us in our last house who always had to park in "his" space. One day my Dad came over to do some painting for us and he parked outside this guys house (not deliberately - just were no other nearby spaces to unload his ladders, paint etc). Well, when the guy came home and couldn't park there he was looking up and down the street trying to work out who the car belonged to. My Dad, bless him was waving at him and sticking his tongue out (from the safety of an upstairs bedroom I might add!)

We also had a next door neighbour who despite having only 1 car and an extra wide drive would still insist on parking right on the edge of our drive (which was narrower and we had 2 cars to park - 1 on drive and 1 on road). I used to watch her going backward and forwards just so she got in the absolute best position. It was incredibly infuriating, but I never said anything cos i just thought I would be sinking to her petty little level!!! Anyway, we've moved now!

At least you guys just have neighbours parking... in our last house a company bought the land outside the house specifically so they could clamp us when we parked! The nearest parking (we were in the town centre) was a 20 minute walk if we missed the one available space, that normally got nicked by commuters.

FIL got a £100 fine for aprking there on Christmas Eve, visiting his Grandkids.

They gave a few people passes, but i didn't qualify. What I ahd to do was park, either carry ds3 (then ages 5 months) round to the house and leave him, whilst getting the others, or take ds1 (sn) to the house and leave him... I didn't qualify for a opass tho. I became pretty much housebound.

They did however give a pass to one of my oldest friends, as her Dad knew the boss, she would happily aprk outside our house and watch me struggle. When I approached her, she said 'That's life, if you parents don't know the right people youll have to get effed'.

Haven't spoken to her since. Never will.

at your friend PC. What a cowbag

Not a cow... looks more like a fish

DH calls her fishy eyes