If you receive an email entitled "Bedtimes" delete it IMMEDIATELY.
Do not open it. Apparently this one is pretty nasty. It will not only
erase everything on your hard drive, but it will also delete anything on disks
within 20 feet of your computer.
It demagnetizes the stripes on ALL of your credit cards.
It reprograms your ATM access code.
Screws up the tracking on your VCR
and uses subspace field harmonics to scratch any CD's you attempt to play.
It will program your phone auto dial to call only 0898 numbers.
This virus will mix antifreeze into your fish tank.
IT WILL CAUSE YOUR TOILET TO FLUSH WHILE YOU ARE SHOWERING.
It will drink ALL your beer.
FOR GOD'S SAKE, ARE YOU LISTENING??
It will leave dirty underwear on the coffee table when you are expecting company.
It will replace your shampoo with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine.
If the "Bedtimes" message is opened in a Windows 98 environment, it will leave
the toilet seat up and leave your hair dryer plugged in dangerously close to a full bathtub.
It will not only remove the forbidden tags from your
mattresses and pillows, it will also refill your skim milk with whole
milk.
WARN AS MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN.
And if you don't send this to 5000 people in 20 seconds, you'll fart
so hard that your right leg will spasm and shoot straight out in front of
you, sending sparks that will ignite the person nearest you.
Send this warning to everyone!!! THERE'S A LOT OF SADNESS IN THE
WORLD! Right now, as you read this, 17 Million people are having SEX!!!
And look at you - you're on the computer.