This will probably get me into trouble... but how can you have money worries...

[emkana]

... when the wife is a full-time GP and the husband a solicitor? I'm just reading "What about me?" by Kate Figes and the narrator in the book is the GP and she moans about not having enough money to buy a decent car or to fix the roof. Now, I estimate that the combined salary of that couple would be about £150.000 a year, wouldn't it? How can that not be enough????????
I know, I know, the woman is the narrator of the book and so it's subjective and you spend what you have so it never feels enough and all that...
but still it puts my back up, am I supposed to empathize with the narrator now over her troubled lot or what???

I suspect my dp of this tarantula! tho he swears it was stolen from the hallway. Blooming thing cost twice as much as my car

Dp admitted to his mistake cos he stayed in the pub to drown his sorrows and was too pissed to think up a credible lie. Have to say tho that I love my bike and me cycling to work saves us a fortune every month or at least it will once Ive paided off the bike repairs .

Well I'm a bit late to this/

But I feel a mortgage is an important thing to have. If we hadn't bought our first place a couple of years back we probably wouldn't have been able to afford to buy this house last year. I'd much rather DH's hard earned money was going to something which will (eventually) be 'ours' - than lining the pockets of some unscrupulous landlord (well you know what I mean LOL).

Not to mention the fact that it's there as security - if (god forbid) the worst happens and DH dies, then the life insurance will pay off the remainder of the mortgage (won't leave me with any cash left over but hey ho LOL). That means I'd be able to continue to live here - and not have to find a job that would cover the cost of the bills AND the mortgage.

If this was a rented house and DH were to die - I'd HAVE to leave it - uprooting my children in the process!

And as for the comment

"t really annoys me when people go on about how much their house is worth now, a lot of my relatives do this say "we bought our house for 45K now it's worth 100K!!" but so are all the other houses in the area so in a way it's all relative,"

Well we bought our first house for £47 (on a 100% mortgage) in 2001. We sold it last year for £87k......so not only had we payed 3yrs mortgage on it (and therefore got a tiny bit of equity) we made a lot of money on it which we were able to use as a deposit for this house - which cost £120k. And is slightly bigger and in a MUCH better area. DH wasn't earning anymore when we bought this one than when we bought the first one though.

Cars essential?? well in some circumstances yes - DH wouldn't have got this job if he didn't own a car - it's essential for his work.

Poor people smoking and drinking then complaining about money - sorry but it happens - not all of them - but enough of them for it to be noticeable. Strangely enough all the my Avon customers who used to order LOADS of stuff every 3 weeks (usually at least £40-50 worth) didn't used to work, and claimed benefits too......

My "posh" customers used to spend about £5-10 (and one used to order ONE bubble bath every 3 weeks - at the grand cost of £1 LOL).

Disposable income is definitely the key. And lets not forget that circumstances can change quickly which can drastically affect peoples finances - but if you've alreayd taken financial commitments on then it DOES become a struggle to keep them up.

Oh and I agree with the comments about "I'm poorer than you" - some of it did read rather like that.

I live off 40 pounds a week but i look like a bag of shit and my kids smell.

QoQ

How are things, have they eased up a little ??

oooo LGJ - after my last sentence on my post I'm not sure I should divulge - don't want to be accused of jumping on the "poorer than you bandwagon"

Well

Just nod once for yes and twice for no

can I shake to say pretty much the same????

Although having said that the VAT returns FINALLY came back to us. So we've managed to pay of most (but not all) of the business 'debts' - and there was even some left over to buy school uniform for DS1 (thank goodness LOL).

Not as bad then.

I was really worried about you last week.

dust is free and has no calories
Unless you suck it up in a Dyson

No - not as bad, still pretty dire but slowly picking up. My mum's being a star when my parents pop in to see us on Tuesday. They still haven't given me a present for my birthday (it was back in March LOL), and DH and the boys birthdays are all coming up before Christmas.

She's persauded my dad to give us £25 each - all in one go and cash (rather than having to send cheques in the post - you know what the Royal Mail is like these days ) - so we'll have 2 weeks shopping money on Tuesday (we just have to make sure we buy 'something' for the boys birthdays LOL).

How did I knopw this one would cause such attention?

I've been in the low salary camp - nearly all my childhood was like that. But we were happy and loved, and had great chiildhoods. We didn't have big holidays, for a good while we didn't have a car and then it was an old one, when my dad was on 3 day week - my mum had tomake food last the week and we'd eat the same food each day as it was easier and cheaper that way. But we didn't complain. We got on with it.

Now I have a pretty good income. We have two cars, soon to have a big mortgage. DD is going to state primary - as in good catchment - but private isn't out of question. We have more than one holiday abroad a year, we eat out regularly. We are happy and healthy and I hope giving DD a happy childhood. We don't have spare cash to spend on things all at once - money tied up in pensions, mortgage, other stuff. But we can get it eventually if we need to. But we don't complain.

I say that as in both situations we didn't complain. No point. In neither situation was I jealous or envious of what others had/have either. There's no need and no point.

If someone is complaining they can't afford something then why worry about it if it doesn't affect you? Just ignore it. (If a very desparate case, then ignoring = no but I am sure YKWIM)

We don't know the ins and outs of people's real lives. Although we may think we do from the outside, in reality things may be different inside the house. You just never know.

Money isn't everything.

I had sympathy for a woman who was complaining that her daughters feet had grown and she couldn't afford to buy her new shoes

UNTIL she told me she had 2 horses and was considering buyng a 3rd

In some cases it is about priorities.

did lose my rag when mil told me that sil was "on the breadline" and could "only afford to eat beans". hmmm maybe she could have sold the 35 grand car parked in the front drive, or sold the brand new granite tile floor in the brand new kitchen extension and replaced it with lino!

It's all a question of personal priorities, I am happy and content with my lot...whilst we're not rolling in it, we are comfortable and have everything we need. We had a substantially higher income pre-DS and a smaller mortgage but always seemed to have less money...mainly due to eating out 3/4 times a week, getting sloshed as and when and going on 2 really expensive holidays a year...
I was happy then and I'm happy now...glad I'm no longer wokring those hours too!
SIL is newly single and has bought her own house, she is often complaining tat she has no money to kit out her new home but has been away every weekend for the past month, has shelled out on loads of fab clothes and "luxuries" like GHD hair straighteners....but her priorities are completely different to mine and she looks great and is having a ball...the manky kitchen will wait!

I agree with gobbledigook and daddycool. If someone wants a huge mortgage and two cars etc etc then that is fair enough. But they have chosen that so can't really complain about having NO money.

I am not well off (single student mum blah blah) but I manage to buy everything I need with a little left over for luxuries as I have a decent amount of 'disposable' income. I feel comfortable in my situation.

At some point in the future I'd like to buy a place but I wouldn't want to buy somewhere that is going to cripple me financially. Though looking at house prices that won't be happening for a LONG LONG time!

Also I have read what people have said about needing cars and that is cool too. But it would irritate me if someone was complaining about money with two (or even one) Jags in their garage!

I once worked out how much money dh and I would need to earn to have no money worries ie not know what was in our bank accounts, not care, know all the bills would be paid, not run up debts, spend money without thinking whenever we wanted to.

And I don't mean having a millionaire lifestlye or even changing our home, sending our children to private school and having 2 or 3 expensive holidays a year - I am talking about having family meals in restaurants once a month, allowing ourselves spending money of £100 each a month for clothes, getting all the dental and optical work we need, having a babysitter once a week, having some weekends away in hotels, going to the theatre once a month, having one average priced two week holiday abroad each year, buying whatever books and music we wanted .. anyway to do all this every month and not worry about money would mean us earning much, much more than we do now.

I'm sure there is a bigger gap now than there was even fifteen years ago between those who have a lifestyle and those who live day to day...I used to enjoy weekend papers and magazines but I now find that they grate on me more and more, mainly because the writers seem to live in a bubble...and it has spread into these kind of books and TV programmes too quite insidiously...

totally agree zippitippi

I agree too and I just love the name 'zippitippitoes' !!

I agree zip! I don't bother w/any mags except the Oprah one and BBC Good Food for that very reason. Don't buy papers, either.

why doesnt this thread die?
surely all that can be said has been said.
is it not all repeating itself?

We've been talking money recently. We have a second child and I've taken a lower paid job and its parttime. We've been doing lots of talking about how we're going to economise and trying to make the figures add up. I'm going to have absolutely no disposable income, which means I won't be able to buy clothes or take the boys swimming, for example. After a few years of having a pretty good lifestyle, this does seem pretty difficult. So we've looked around and seen where we can make savings (Lidl & charity shops instead of Waitrose & John Lewis). I have to confess that I did feel a bit down about it, but I say to myself (& dp) "we might be finding it tight but by British standards we are well off, and by world standards we are dirty rich." Yes it's annoying, but it's really something I would keep to myself (well, apart from you lot, obviously )

Wow, what a response!
Am v. relieved that I didn't get any flak .
I agree with Gdg, and you're right about the point I was making.
Stitch, if you feel this thread has run its course I suggest you stop clicking on it. If others feel they want to contribute, then please let them.