Tea Room the Fifteenth - The Viking Hall

[amberlight]

Here we are in the 15th instalment of the Tea Room for the One Child Family board. All are welcome, whether parents of a single splendid offspring or any other number.
We are this time in a Viking Long Hall tearoom, complete with optional helmets, roaring log fires (in case of chilly spring evenings), rugs aplenty, and all the usual mod cons of life as well.
Our Viking tea room contains Mellors the gardener/handyperson with a talent for relaxing massage (amongst a variety of other characters including Bishops, camels, bison, horses, guinea pigs, dogs, etc etc for reasons that would take too long to explain but you're welcome to read the other Tea Room threads and prepare to have your mind thoroughly boggled). Plenty of tea/coffee/cake/virtual bolly always on offer.
Join us, relax, chat, enjoy.

Morning all!

I am going to the west of ireland for the long weekend with LittleO and a close friend of mine!! I'm really looking forward to it! DH is working all weekend, and the friend is single and was just planning to go on his own, and I just mentioned how I'd like to go, so now I'm going. I hope it works out ok, as he had plans of hill walking and then sitting in the pub with a book and a pint...dh and I pointed out that things will be very different with a 3 year old in tow. He said he'd love the company so hopefully it will go well and he'll enjoy doing child friendly activities.

Also...I just this morning got an email from another close friend of mine saying that he has been seeing a man for the past few months!! It is very very surprising news. People have frequently said to me am I sure he's not gay, as he is quite camp and twice divorced, but he has never given us any inkling of an attraction to men at all in all the 13 years we have been close friends with him!! So it is very surprising but I'm happy for him and looking forward to meeting the guy.

Racing - loving wriggles butterfly kissing!

Here be more cake and coffee. I mistyped the "cake" as "care" but I think I should leave that
so... here be care, cake and coffee

Thumb - amazed you have to extract bogies. Sadly Oxboy is adept at removing his own

CMOT - are you camping this weekend? We were hoping to but not now, maybe another week or two

Scout - look forward to hearing about the new stroller seat. Oxboy has a great buggy that he loves so much he still sometimes elects to use it - almost buckled under his Nearly Four weight

All back and happy in the Ox Household, but we had an Encounter with IKEA which, lets face it, is never good

As with Mistle, I am boy free to work today, so I'd better crack on

AandO have a great weekend and gosh but perhaps good re gay friend?

A&O - West of Ireland - lovely! I did a trip several years ago with friends - we started at Derry and worked our way round the coast to Galway, then cut across the middle to Dublin and back up the East coast. I have very fond and entertaining memories of Galway!

We used to go to the Butterfly Collection at Syon Park until they moved it, I think to London Zoo. Very entertaining having butterflies landing on my specs!

We are having Big Rain with much Thunder and Lightning - but thankfully no twisty winds as yet! One hit about 5 hours North of us today, completely unexpectedly - wrecked a bunch of houses but amazingly no one was hurt.

Mistle - Shirburn, at the castle ? I did the 75 in 85 one there when it rained lots and lots.

Off camping tomorrow - we are going to Gullivers near MK so can do theme park and camping which will be fun. Am having the usual grr at DH as he has failed to find the charger leads for the battery which his CPAP needs to run off overnight. This is a common theme, and each time I point out that they should be in a box, labelled

I love Galway too Thumb - I have a lovely customer there, which always helps

AH, we too had a lovely trip in Ireland. Galway, Cork. Kerry ring, lovely. Got engaged on a beach in Conemarra as it happens

Connemara is where we are going!

Very upset at the mo. A payment into my business bank account has not arrived today as expected. My business bank account is now overdrawn. I haven't been able to pay myself my full salary because of this and so have now missed this months mortgage payment. I have just received a letter from them and also from my credit card company saying I didn't make my payment. I'm really stressed out about this, really really stressed out. We have to go to the uk next week for a big family thing. I'm supposed to be going away this weekend. I can't cancel the trip to the UK, even my relatives in the US are making the trip. Even when the money comes through after I've paid the mortgage I'll have next to nothing left...and all this is before I become unemployed in two months time!!!

I actually even went into the local shop to buy food for dinner and my card was refused...no food, how awful is that! I don't know how this situation has arose!

Sorry, just needed to tell someone, to get it off my chest.

Oh no, A&O - that's terrible!
I hate cash flow issues, they're so distressing, especially because you can see the domino effects but are powerless to do anything about it!

Have a ((hug)) and a pain au chocolat

Eek re cashflow situation, A&O! Really hope that payment arrives pronto.

Is it the weekend yet???

Hello everyone. Brain too full and week too rubbish to be of use to anyone at all apart from tea making and duvet-handing-out.

Passes A&O a big cake of her choosing.

Amber, it's the weekend if you're in univ. (At least, that's the way it worked in the States....)

mistle -- Guide camp isn't that bad. Well, if you can get past the hormones, attitudes, rain, mud, etc. LOL Seriously, though, is very good fun! Was a leader at home and joined promptly when I moved here. Met HubbyScout at a jamboree.

Stroller seat was a success! We have a MC4 from MotherCare and until yesterday just had the chasis and used his carseat in it. Now we have one of those seats that can be used as a pram or a big boy seat (parent facing or forward facing). Looks like he can still use it as a pram for a little bit, but he likes to sit up and look out at the world. Bought a cup & snack holder in the States last month and used it today for BabyScout's spouty cup and my bottle of water -- he was quite intriqued by that, too.

Good evening, all. Lovely evening, so glad to see that we are all taking the air outside the long hut with a selection of cocktails and a catering pack little bowls of twiglets.

CMOT, sadly Worldwide Butterflies outside Sherborne is no longer there. When I was at school I worked there at the weekend in the summer; collecting leaves for the caterpillars and serving in the shop. It was less idyllic than it seemed - staff had to eat their lunch standing up in a room full of dead butterflies, but I still remember misty mornings out wandering the grounds picking mulberry leaves for the silk worms.

Angela and Angela would seem perfectly reasonable to Wriggle; two of her guinea pigs are called Beebee Loobee Un and Beebee Loobee Deux and she has an imaginary foal called Hairband.

And eek re cashflow situation! Living in a city (as I think you do), do you have a hugely overstocked larder and freezers like we remote country dwellers do?

Arrgh re late payment A&O - hope you find some way of getting through it.

Glad the seat is a sucess Scout.

It's funny how clear my memory of Worldwide Butterflies is - probably because there weren't many walk through butterfly places then, and it made a change from Portland museum (my grandads favourite place to go to entertain children)

Everything is called Angela if it has to have a name - we celebrated when a toy dog was named Woofer the other week. Hairband seems like a good name to me.

Celebration of the day - I am getting a part loan of a horse , so can ride him anytime he isn't being used in lessons

Loving the names of things. We haven't progressed to names. All things are simply "bear" and "rabbit" etc. I think Hairband and Angela are progress

It is making naming the kitten difficult. I think it will simply be called Kitten or Kitty. When asked Oxboy said "call it Oxboy" but we suggested it might be confusing when I said "no" or "come here Oxboy" etc. I am not sure he saw it as a problem....

AandO I feel your pain. Cash flow is a big issue with us. Well me. I try to hide it from the rest of the family. And the ruddy banks are now so inflexible. I have shouted pointed out that it wasn't me that got into terrible debt and had to be bailed out by the government so why must I no longer be allowed to borrow off uncleared cheques? They remain impassiave and just cancel my cards [sigh]

Just need a quick moan (and maybe a bit of cake).

I know the woman on the path back from the grocery store was just being friendly and making conversation (after oohhhing and aahhhing over BabyScout and his sunglasses and hat), but she wound me up (unintentionally, I know). She was asking BabyScout when he was going to have a little sister and I said "probably never, he's likely to be an only." And she went on and on about how children need siblings and it's good to have a brother or sister "like we do." Then she actually said "Having a sibling will teach him things like how to share." I've been taking BabyScout to various baby/toddler groups since he was 4-6 weeks old, plus he has cousins, plus, and forgive me if I'm wrong, don't parents teach them how to share and being with other PEOPLE of any age lets them practice? I was an only until I was 7 1/2 and I remember being a toddler and playing with my cousins and other toddlers on the street and sharing with all of them!

I know it was unintentional but it really got to me! BabyScout was a surprise BabyScout. I'm happy he's here and I love him to bits. But I have a complicated medical story, made even more complicated by things that were discovered while I was pregnant. I need to have some treatments that are fetal toxic. I either have to have a baby before I start or postpone and get pregnant after I finish (which is about 18 months). We've made the decision to start treatments sooner rather than later (so start in August) and I don't want to risk pregnancy afterwards because I don't know what the medicine is going to do to my body/eggs/etc. BabyScout is it. I am, for the most part, at peace with this. My family (back in the States) is supportive of me and are thankful for their grandson (my ILs still think I should have another post treatments but it's a risk DH & I are not prepared to take).

Sorry for the rant and to dump a bit more than I probably should have, but I figured you'd all understand and reassure me that really, BabyScout is going to grow up knowing things like sharing and playing with friends and all of that. (I know he will, because it's the parents that teach and model, but I just need to hear it again from someone else.)

Well, that woman should have STFU a lot quicker and minded her own - but it's the same level of mind-boggling thoughtlessness that seems to occur so often - people just can't help themselves! "this is what I think, it's obviously right and I'm going to push it onto everyone else, regardless of their unseen circumstances".

Scout - sorry you had to go through it. And I presume you and your DH have also had thorough discussion about egg harvesting/later IVF/ surrogacy etc. so I won't say anything else about it. for you having what sounds like very unpleasant treatments as well.

A friend of mine had a horrible experience with a molar pg after having her son - everything that could go wrong did and she can never run the risk of getting pg again just in case - apparently the risk of a second molar rises to 1 in 50 - doesn't sound a lot but as she said, she had the long odds every step of the way and she wasn't prepared to take the chance! She looked into all possible alternatives but gave up in the end, so her DS is an only as well.

Oh Scout. Poor you. I too am, due to entirely different circumstances, sure Oxboy will be one of one but the careless words of strangers can hurt. Funnily enough we are getting a kitten and the owner has been on and on at us to get two : one will be lonely. One is no fun. You need two like children. It's not a family etcet. I have even said "we just have one ds thank you. We like ones in our family" but no hint has been taken. Honestly I am nearly ready to ram the poor kitten where the sun dont shine and it's not his fault!
I am dreading ds saying "it will be lonely. Like me"
hell
I have hijacked your rant into Kittengate. But I am trying to say yes. I understand. No you are not being unreasonable or touchy and you should tmrant qway.

No. Scoutette will not share. But that's because he's a baby and yes. You'll beat teach it into him. Heaven help us if we relied on other toddlers (siblings or no) to teach us manners !!!

miniThumb is learning how to share - currently he shares about as badly well as any other 2.6 yo, it seems - and the others in his playgroup all have older sibs so yar boo sucks to that theory!

Thanks ox and thumb. I know she got to me and normally I'd be able to brush it off. But feeling a bit blah and possibly a bit hormonal at the moment. BabyScout was exclusively breastfed until the other week and now he's completely weaned and sometimes I think I'm still in shock/awe that we made it to 6+ months EBF and while I know I needed to wean for the treatments, sometimes when I'm out & about I think "oh, but I miss it." And the thought that shocked me "I'll never get to have new baby cuddle naked on me, looking for it's milk." As well, I've been going through his baby-baby things and passing on/sharing what I can with younger/smaller babies and it makes me a bit sad to think that I won't need them back. When we were in the States last month, Mom & I measured him in at 28" (and that was about 27 weeks) and at weigh in last Friday (30 weeks) he was 19 lbs 3 oz -- he seems to have skipped a clothing size and now most of his things are 9 mos. so I've been thinking "I'll never have a tiny one again." (Or, like the shorts he had on today were 6-12 months/27-29 inches/17-22 pounds.) And I've been putting clothes into my treasure box to keep and I look at his bear-suit (his winter coat) and think "No one will wear this again." (Maybe I'm greedy but certain things I'm not passing on and his bear suit is one!)

I know, boo to the theory that siblings equal sharing. I have three nieces and two nephews, all of the same family. Child number four, at four-and-a-half, still thinks EVERYTHING is his, no matter what it is, and won't let the others have a turn at/with anything.

Oh, and oxeye, love the story of kittengate. PiL cat had kittens and we were going to get one of them (I really want kitten, especially black like these were) but wouldn't take possession of said kitten until Feb when we returned from the States. Somehow conversation never came up again and because we didn't take it rather than PiL find a new home they have kept kitten with other kitten because they're siblings (and the next generation up is siblings) because they have the whole "cats need other cats" thinking, too.

And I would just like to add.... This afternoon, as I was taking care of Code Emergency Brown, I thanked God that BabyScout is an only because I'm not sure how I'd cope with a Code Emergency Brown and another baby at the same time!

apologetic at Code Emergency Brown - if it's what I think it is, I sympathise, having had to deal with it yesterday morning and to a lesser extent this morning as well.

Another tornado here today - south of us this time - less exciting damage than yesterday's though. More Big Rain all day - miniThumb did go out because MIL took him out to what she calls "muck up" - I have no clue and assume it's some kind of indoor soft play area.

Do cats need other cats? Guineapigs do (although I'm not convinced our 2 need each other, particularly) but cats? Don't know.

Am off to bed now anyway - have a nice bolly-filled evening!

thumb -- yes, you probably know what Code Emergency Brown is. Code Brown but bath-worthy. Uck.

Cats don't really need other cats; theybare solitary animals. Look at jaguars, tigers, etc. I know lions spoil my theory, but I am sure house cats are quite happy without other cats, as long as your family undertakes to play with it and stroke it all the time. Difficult job, but someone will have to do it.

A new member has come to join the RacingMenagerie - a racing pigeon (yes, really!) which has been hanging around for days has now wandered into the house and we have seen that its wing is injured. Wriggle has been cuddling it all afternoon and it doesn't seem to mind. Wondering whether to put it in with our pigeons or whether they will attack it.

Wriggle will also be an only. Most of my friends and acquaintances know how difficult it was to successfully achieve Wriggle and are careful what they say, but I did have a very hard time when all my friends were getting pregnant with their second; it is an awful time, be prepared by getting a puppy/touring the South Seas. Funnily enough, when the babies are born it is OK again.

cake please. can;t stop. room full of family. has been a hectic few days.