Tea Room the Twelfth

[RacingSnake]

Come in, come in, to Tea Room the Twelfth! We now inhabit a rambling log cabin, surrounded by mysterious pine forests and mist-covered mountains (but also, strangely) easily accessible by regulars, new-comers and passing bishops, ferried in by Mellors driving the troika. All the usual rules apply and all are welcome!

Have decorated tree without too much in the way of temper and sulking, eaten some festive spagetti, wrapped Wriggle's presents (from a charity shop and wrapped in newspaper - long may that continue to be possible!), been turned down by friends we invited to help us eat turkey (my sister can't come to perform that function due to weather) and now still talking to each other. Som much better than it could have been! Nice glass of bolly for those still wrapping?

Racing - Presents wrapped in newspaper? That is the last word in eco-chic. I heard it on Woman's Hour so it must be true.

Will it be just the four of you tomorrow? Poor sister trapped wherever she is trapped.

I have a balanced diet here - Bolly in one hand and Poinsettia in the other.

Am I chic?? Actually it was mainly because we put the Christmas tree in front of the cupboard which contains the wrapping paper. But that has been recycled many times. MIL usually good for good quality paper that will do a couple of years.

Yes, sister trapped in Frozen North. Far from the turkey she requested!

Will you be celebrating a trois? I take it that Mellors may drop in.

Racing - You are beyond chic. You are chic and ecologicaly sound. I prostrate myself before you.

We will be celebrating a neuf. I'n not expecting Mellors. He seldom leaves the tea room, as you know (his recent mercy dash to you was very out of character) and I think he'll be kept pretty busy, chopping logs for the open fire and making sure that the aga doesn't go out.

And no doubt supplying soothing foot rubs and lavender-infused towels for fevered brows.

A neuf!

What a marvellous idea! If it all gets too fraught tomorrow I will sneak in here for a soothing peppermint foot rub.

A neuf, oui! But this is one day a year and nobody stays overnight. I, on the other hand, am always in awe that you have the Aged P living with you as that is a daily commitment.

Meine Damen und Herren. I am at your disposal for soothing foot rubs and lavender-infused towels for fevered brows. If the jollity and bonhomie should prove overpowering, do please step up for a therapeutic treatment. As you know, I am usually a man of few words - I feel emboldened now by the port which was left by the fireplace and which Father Christmas has not touched - so I may not speak when you come in. But I will hear and I will meet your needs.

Merry Christmas.

Happy Christmas everyone

Brilliant day here so far. Hope it is for others too.

Happy Christmas all

Lovely relaxed day here, and DS is sleeping off the excitement, so DH and I are quaffing a cheeky sauvignon blanc after a lovely goose dinner

Happy Christmas!

Suprisingly painless here, in spite of DH having a splitting headache and Weiggle being over excited and provocative (and insisting on watching 'Tinkerbell' four times in French.)

However, quite tired. so will avail myself of Mellors' blessedly tacitern services and have a little shoulder rub.

Racing, how lovely to see you again. I did so enjoy my visit to your charming country home. Being so strong and virile, I have gently lifted the snoozing Amber and placed her on the distressed chintz sofa (which, by the way, I have today re-stuffed and re-upholstered, using the skills which recently earned me the Mrs Joyful Prize for Raffia Work and Upholstery). If you would care to lie on the massage table, I shall offer you my very finest shoulder rub.

My, what a chatterbox I am tonight.

Would any of you other ladies like a cocktail?

What a chatterbox you are! Impressed with the rather-less-distressed chinz sofa and I feel that a fresh start is good for RacungPig, as we all try to help him to forget his Traumatic Experience. The chinz might look just a tad inconguous amidst all this pine and reindeer skins?

So sorry, Racing, that I did not explain properly. The distressed chintz sofa is what it was, before I went to work on the stuffing and re-covering. (As I mentioned, I was the star of Mrs Joyful's Raffia and Upholstery class). If you peep under the reindeer skin throw, you will see that it has had a makeover and is now the comfortably squashy leather sofa (all the animals involved died in tranquil old age), against which, as I'm sure you'll agree, the throws and cashmere blankets look magnificent.

And I used a few offcuts of timber to make RacingPig his own tyrolean-style chalet, in which he can entertain his friends.

Well, Racing, as you may know, I have in the past suffered Romantic Disappointments and came to the tea room in the hope of Starting Anew. I have no family and few male friends who share my wide interests in everything from ballroom dancing to ha-ha maintenance. Mine has been a solitary life and so I choose to throw myself into my work. Besides, the remote location here makes it a little difficult to socialise.

How was the shoulder rub?

Well, Racing, as you may know, I have in the past suffered Romantic Disappointments and came to the tea room in the hope of Starting Anew. I have no family and few male friends who share my wide interests in everything from ballroom dancing to ha-ha maintenance. Mine has been a solitary life and so I choose to throw myself into my work. Besides, the remote location here makes it a little difficult to socialise.

How was the shoulder rub?

Hope you all had a lovely Christmas Day - ours went fairly well (despite having feed chewed to bits by sandflies at MIL's lunch) and the evening was lovely - lots of candles, fairy lights, excellent goose dinner courtesy of MrThumb and my pud. MiniThumb tucked in with gusto (quite unusual) and seems to be taken with sprouts although still rejecting carrots

Catita - ((hugs)) to you and Kittenito - hope it all works out properly this time for him.

Mellors, you are doing sterling work there - bagsy a go when you've fixed up MadBad an RS and evicted Amber from the towels.

Am going to introduce the non-seasonal option of Pimms - I really fancied one about 6pm yesterday and of course couldn't have one as I hadn't even thought of looking to see if you can buy it here - must check now. Pimms anyone?

Whew, what a Christmas Day!

Morning everyone. What was yours like?

Good day, Thumb. Kindly get up on the massage table and your treatment can begin. Would a back, neck and shoulder massage do the trick? With or without the hot stones?

I had a very pleasant Christmas, thank you for asking, Amber. As the tea room was quiet, I got on with the long-overdue job of renovating the chintz sofa and also practised a few carpentry and joinery skills, making RacingPig's new chalet. Just for you, I also rearranged the tea room library's stock of old car magazines in alphabetical and chronological order, so that Autocar is no longer mixed up with What Car in that discomfiting way.

I also took the liberty of helping myself to some of the single malt in the tea room decanter, so think I will pass on the offer of a Pimms, Thumb.

ooh, Mellors - bless your kind hands. No stones for me thanks - tried that once and didn't like it.

I agree that Pimms wouldn't go well with whisky, I may have tried that combo at some point however, no doubt with very Bad Effect (so many of my drinking episodes ended up with Very Bad Effect, it's difficult to remember why). I can assure people that it is a Very Bad Idea to mix Guinness and whisky though...

Have just checked my last post and realised that the sandflies weren't sufficiently maligned - it was my feet that were chewed to bits, not my feed. Damn insects. Another of Old Harry's inventions, no doubt.

Gosh, can't believe my aromatherapy knowledge has almost deserted me...

Christmas wishes to all from deepest darkest Brittany!!!

x x x x x

Hey, shuffle over, Thumb! I am feeling a little wan, after yesterday's mass catering, and would really appreciate some of Mellors' massage magic. What oil combination do you recommend for the tired and middle-aged mother-of-one? Or should I trust to Mellors, who Knows Everything?

Mwah! mwah! for the Breton Tea!

Wriggle went through a brassica-eating phase, Thumb, and I thought I had cracked the eating business and would never have a fussy child. How little I knew. Wriggle is now holding out for a diet of crisps and chocolate buttons and, as far as I can see, living on about a teaspoonful of more nutritious food a day. Somehow she is managing to grow and even develop a tummy, although her favourite foodstuffs are severely restricted.

Oh the delights of feeding toddlers. MadBadBaby was almost completely omniverous as a toddler. I was so smug. But now there are numerous things she won't eat. And if I protest "but you used to like them when you were little", she gives me a withering look and says "but I'm not little now". She will grow up to be a professor of logic. With rickets.