Help please

[Lottiew49]

Hi first post here. My daughter has just turned 5. She is the only child. She has been at summer camp this week and now this is the second time I’ve been taken to one side at the end of the day. First time she bite someone now today she scratched someone back. Both times someone did something to her first. She can get cross and I admit she has been spoilt at times. She only hits or pinches me not my husband when she is getting. I feel like a terrible mum and I just don’t no what to do anymore. I lost my mum in April she had a big impact on both of our life’s I miss her very much. I guess I’m asking for help, advise and what am I doing wrong?

Firstly you're doing nothing wrong. Parenting is tough on it's own let alone when you're grieving and having a tough time of it. I'm sure you're doing a great job.
How do you react when she hurts you? What are the consequences?
I'm a nursery nurse and I carry out the same behaviour tactics/rules that we use in school. My DD (2yr old) recently started biting, for no particular reason. At first I showed her how that felt by putting my teeth on her and apply alittle pressure (not actually biting) although she cried. I then explained it was wrong. I repeated this also the second time. When it happened a third time I gave her time out and explained why she was given time out. It happen a few more times after this but thankfully she hasn't done it for alittle while.
When she does make bad choices she is given a warning twice and on the third time it's time out (for this she sits on our bottom step then I go to her after two minutes and have a calm chat with her. Always making sure she is calm and no longer crying when I do so). Followed by her no longer being able to do/play with what she was before, that's her consequence for receiving time out.

I hope this helps.

Thank you. When she bit for the first time and I found out I explained how wrong it was and if someone dose something to you it doesn’t mean it’s ok to do something to them she had been told all treats had stopped ie any chocolate or ice cream. When she scratched yesterday she had any I pad time removed. If she dose it to me then she has time out. I’m so reluctant to let her go to last day of summer camp today as I dreading what she might do and I also feel a little embarssed. They said she is allowed back but she will be watched and have a adult with her.