Is my child lonely

[kittenge]

Love my 9r old daughter so much and worry about the fact that I'm a single mum and only one child. I grew up with 3 siblings so worry my daughter will grow up without social skills. But I also worry about how easily upset she is when she's in a group of children. Maybe I should be braver and leave her to it. Currently I run out of the house when she's upset.

Sounds like my 8 yr old DD. Shes also an only child and Im a single

I don’t really worry about her social skills but I do think she has a harder time with some things.

I have a 8yo dd and growing up there are times when she would want to play with children her age and how i wish she has siblings. We are working out and hopefully it's not yet too late.

You run out of the house when she’s upset?

You need to get out of the mind set that only children lack social skills. 'Tis bollocks.
Any why are you running out of the house?

Have you ever seen two children from the same family fight it out over the front passenger seat of the car? Your daughter will be just fine.

Can you make friends with other families in your street?
My 5yo has befriended the 3.5 year old upstairs in our apartment block and they spend their evenings and weekends while we are home playing between the apartments and in the hall.
I’m also a single Mum with just one, I think we just have to facilitate more friend opportuniti s and allow them to get on with it rather than get too involved...

She’ll be fine. Unless you make a big thing of it by running out of the house, seems a bit extreme OP.

My daughter is also 9 & sort of an only child as my other 3 are adults (daughters 33 & 31 with own homes & kids, plus son, nearly 29...been living back at home a few years). She used to see my grandchildren regularly, who range in age from 3-17years, so I didnt worry about social skills. But as they are getting older they are all at clubs etc or at their other parents/grandparents since daughters split with partners. Last year my hubby left & I had to move daughter from local school to where I teach. She doesn't see much of her friends from the local school now & found it hard to make friends at her new school. It's hard to arrange playdates when she goes to ASC or her dad's but I do try. She has a very close friend 2 doors down, they knock of each other all of the time.....but they are moving away on Friday & she's gutted. There aren't many children of a similar age in our street. It means I must make more effort with the play dates. And play with her more myself.

I think it's best not to make the fact she's an only a negative focus. My daughter is 13 and my only.
It wasn't my plan tbh but she knows no different. She has had as many ups and downs over the years as my friends kids, who are one of two or three.
I remember having some struggles at school when I was younger, I have a brother and sister plus step siblings.
Make the best of what you have and enjoy her.

Children are v rarely plain sailing all of the time, whether they are from big, small or average sized families. Dont make it a big deal.

Being lonely and struggling with social skills are not the same thing and there's no reason that an only child should be either. I mean this kindly, but is being easily upset something she has learnt from you? Running out of the house seems a very dramatic way to react. Could you both work on being more resilient?

I'm also a single parent to a 9 year old girl.

I think she gets lonely sometimes but we all do surely?

What helps is:

A friend over for tea once a week
Dance class twice a week
Seeing cousins/extended family on a weekend.
Spending time together playing games or watching a movie.