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Should I have a other child?

8 replies

laurenkirkby1992 · 19/09/2016 13:29

Ok so I currently have a 2 1/2 year old boy, I really really want to try for a girl but I'm unsure if I will be putting to much pressure on myself, I suffer with depression which at the moment I am doing fantastic with and have it all under control, I just don't want to mess it all up. I have 2 cats a dog and a little boy too look after on a daily and nightly basis oh and my husband who is like a big kid lol and then myself! I just wanted some advice from anyone whos house is as busy as mine and if having another child worked well with your hetic life lol thanks

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Soubriquet · 19/09/2016 13:30

Is it just a girl you want or another baby in general

Would you be happy if that baby is a boy as you have just as much a chance of having a boy as you do a girl?

NapQueen · 19/09/2016 13:31

How would you feel if you had another boy?

laurenkirkby1992 · 19/09/2016 13:35

I would still be very happy to have a boy but I will try my hardest and all these tips to have a girl as then I will have one of each and be super happy lol but I just don't want to jump in and go over my head with the worry of my issues surfacing

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Soubriquet · 19/09/2016 13:40

I have a history of depression

I had terrible post natal depression with my dd and whilst they resurfaced with ds it wasn't as bad

WordGetsAround · 19/09/2016 13:44

If your motivation is to have another child, I'd go for it. If it's to have a girl, don't do it.

laurenkirkby1992 · 19/09/2016 13:47

I have researched my medication that I am currently on and it's ok to take through the first and second trimester but I cannot take it during the third so I won't be off my meds for too long before I can take them again if I really need too that is, I'm just unsure and can't seem to make my mind up my husband works in the army and we are currently posted to a foreign country so I won't be working for another 2 years whilst we are here, and when I go back to the UK I want to dive back into work and focus on making money for my family so it's either I try for a baby now or wait until my little one is at least 6 or 7 and iv worked for a few years first I just don't know what to do, my husband wants one some days and then doesn't other days but I think that's just because he is worried about my mental state. I have the coil fitted at the moment so there won't be any worries for accidental conception right now.

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laurenkirkby1992 · 19/09/2016 13:50

My child can be quite a handful at times also he is very demanding and advanced for his age so I am pushed to my limits most days, I do feel like he would love a little sister (hopefully) or brother to play with and maybe give me a break sometimes lol

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turtlesallthewaydown · 19/09/2016 13:58

With the best will in the world there is precious little you can do to increase your chances of having a girl. But if you're ok with that, here's my experience of having two, just under three years apart.

It is a lot more work, more juggling and obviously more of the usual domestic crap. It's definitely harder coping with sleep deprivation when you have a child to look after as well as your baby. Having two also adds a new element to being a parent. One of the things I find the hardest is refereeing and defusing situations. I think mine are fairly normal, but they play together ok about half the time and the other half bicker and fight. They are 8 and 5 and this has been the case for at least two years. I tend toward depression and am an introvert, so I find this the most tiring aspect.

Having said that, they have a little buddy at home to play make believe with, spend hours on the swings with, and someone to look out for them for (hopefully) the rest of their lives. And I love them both deeply.

So I guess it's about assessing if you have the capacity to take on more. My OH would have had a third. I knew I wouldn't cope well with that so stopped at two and it was the right decision for me.

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