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One-child families

Got questions about only having one child? Find the answers here.

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Original poster

The Nordic Tearoom (Number 31)

981 replies

beanandspud · 21/11/2011 16:30

We have moored the barge for the winter and have moved to a beautiful, cosy log cabin in deepest Scandinavia overlooking a frozen lake and surrounded by pine trees.

Mellors has lit the log fires and candles, it is snowing outside and there are comfortable seats for everyone and fleecy blankets to snuggle up in. For the more active tearoomers there are skis and sledges outside as well as a steaming hot tub for winding down after a busy day.

So pull up a chair. The kettle is on for and there is always plenty of depending on your mood and time zone. (Alternatively there is schnapps, smorgasbord and smoked fish).

Everybody is welcome ? share as much or as little as you like ? but no fisticuffs please!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

UniS · 14/12/2011 09:54

ohhh, thank you amber a is most welcome .

ComeIntoTheFestiveGardenMaud · 14/12/2011 13:00

Hmm. There are several threads at the moment about taking (or not taking) photos at school events. Does your school have a policy, UniS? Does the HT stand up and make an announcement before the play/concert/event? Some parents are dense and thoughtless unaware of the wider safeguarding implications of putting photos on FB and need to have it spelt out to them very clearly. It's an issue for us at Brownies too.

oxeye · 14/12/2011 13:55

Amber - hope you're ok

JM - I know that feeling of concern. Rationally remind yourself of the statistics, which as a healthcare provider you will know. Then watch him well. It's highly unlikely to be meningitis but watch for a rash, for temperature and remember you are better equipped to cope with something going wrong than most. Calpol and bed would be my first line defence

we have no school policy re photos it never occurred to me there'd be lots on FB which makes me panic slightly because I am never on it so wouldn't know i think I shall just think that use of photos is unpleasant but ultimately not harmful to us. And identifying OxBoy for evil purposes is sufficiently remote as to be unconcerning

did anyone hear the Radio 4 programme on risk last week? Fascinating

Scout19075 · 14/12/2011 18:41

Evening all. MrScout is at his work Christmas do and after a busy day (new tires, soft play with Toddler's friend and then off to the mixed-age Christmas party), Toddler is in bed early since he was napless today.

Who would like some with me?

Scout19075 · 14/12/2011 18:49

Having worked with children who's non-custodial parent have had restraining orders against them (forbidding them near said child) I'm very sensitive about pictures despite being snap-happy myself. I only put pictures on Facebook of children other than Toddler if I have the parents' permission. I don't tag anyone though might make reference to "Mom/Grandmom" or "Dad" but don't put names. My Seniors know they are not to tag themselves or friends in photos and if they use a photo with Toddler in it they are not to tag me or name him.

Like today, I have pictures of Toddler and his friend up but her mum knows they're there (she's a FB friend, too). Even though she says I can tag her daughter she knows I won't so she might go and save a couple of pictures to her page so her mum can see them (just like my Mom can see them).

UniS · 14/12/2011 19:13

at school play last week, HT stood in front of assembled masses of parents and said ,you may take pics for personal use, please do not post on social media/ face book/ internet etc ".There was also a poster saying the same thing as you entered the building.

Its down right Rude to post other peoples kids pics ( and for all I know names too) all over the place with out permission, and yes, it may be that there are children for whom its dangerous too. I try very hard to keep boys name off the internet, I will give permission for some things but not for his full name and picture to go together. Really I ought to check exactly what permission I gave school, as he made it to teh local rag the other week in a pic taken in school. I think they stayed right side of my permission, but wouldn't hurt to check.

UniS · 14/12/2011 19:13

ooops- rant over, sorry.

Scout19075 · 14/12/2011 19:24

Oh, that would certainly irritate me, too, UniS.

I know in the case of Toddler's friend, the first time I wielded my camera, even before I took it out of the bag, I asked if I was allowed to take pictures of her and did she mind if I posted them so family/friends at home could see. I also give her a CD with the entire series of pictures, not just the ones I post (she has a babe-in-arms so can't always get her camera out in time so I do it for both of us). If we're at activities in centers I make sure no other kid is in the shot as well as having permission from the people that run the activities. If they say "no" or a parent protests the camera goes away.

Scout19075 · 14/12/2011 19:43

WOW!

Jacksmania · 14/12/2011 20:19

Hi everyone, we had a really unsettled night and ended up giving JB some Tylenol (Scout, would that be the same thing as Calpol in the UK?) at 3 am because he was just baking hot. After that he cooled down and slept until 8 am. He's still snotty and a bit congested but was super happy to go to G-ma's.

Thanks oxeye for the words of wisdom - HCPs make the world's most anxious parents :)

Question: what does "you don't know you're born" mean?
Read it on another thread, feel rather clueless.

UniS, I would be livid. I actually Had Words with DH's aunt over that very thing. Made it very clear that I was Not OK with her posting pictures of JB on her FB page. She said "what if he's in a picture with all his cousins?" which is fair, so I then asked her to please not identify him by name. I had to be Rather Firm with her over it (to DH's embarrassment, although he ended up agreeing with me) and she's, thankfully, been all right about it. It's such an awkward thing. Forgive the use of caps, I know it's a bit naff, but it does get the point across .

Scout19075 · 14/12/2011 20:24

Tylenol lists the main active ingredient as Acetaminophen and Calpol lists there's as Paracetamol. I believe that's the same thing?

Poor JB. How is he today JM?

And how are you feeling about tomorrow?

Jacksmania · 14/12/2011 21:11

Oh yes, then it must be the same thing.

Thanks Scout - JB was being his almost-usual chipper little self this morning, maybe a little less energetic than normal, but pretty good. I don't like how he feels when he has a temperature, that baking heat just feels all wrong. But he cooled down pretty quickly with Tylenol.

Just had a call from the surgical centre, they want me there at 12:15, 12:30 on Friday, and the op will start around 1:30. I should be ready to go home by 5 pm if all goes well. Will update you all as soon as I can make my eyes focus . Feeling a little wobbly, but not too bad.

Jacksmania · 14/12/2011 21:15

For all you handy people who can fix everything with superglue and a little duct tape, I put superglue to a novel use today. I have a crack in the skin of my thumb, from the corner of nail outward, from the cold and damp and washing my hands a gazillion times a day and working with my hands, and it took nearly three weeks to heal. Monday morning it opened up again when I worked on my first patient. Bloody, bloody, bloody. I looked up cures online (desperate) and finally found a wp where someone used superglue to glue it shut and it healed from the bottom up. So I tried it. Feels a bit odd, but at least I can work and not wince in pain every time I put some pressure on my thumb. And after tomorrow, it will have two weeks to heal. Hmm... I don't think that qualifies me as a handyperson, but it's a good start .

ComeIntoTheFestiveGardenMaud · 14/12/2011 23:04

I've heard of hospitals using superglue in place of sutures - I don't know whether its standard superglue from a DIY store or medical grade stuff, but it must work!

"You don't know you're born" is a British (?) idiom for "you don't know how lucky you are and ought to stop whining"; as in

"AIBU to be outraged that, although my bonus last year was $1 trillion, this year I'm only going to get $5 million and a tube of jaffa cakes?"

"You don't know you're born. I earn 5 cents a year and have to live in a paper bag in the middle of the road" and so on.

(with apologies to Monty Python's four Yorkshiremen sketch)

oxeye · 15/12/2011 00:03

I've never used superglue but always use spray plaster on finger cracks and it works brilliantly, heals from bottom up, so I guess its the same principle!

Someimes, I'm so lucky I don't know I'm born

Thumbinnapuddingwitch · 15/12/2011 03:30

The only photos that I'm happy to plaster over the internet are those of our playgroup - and they all go into a Closed Group on FB so only the other members of it can see the photos. If anyone were to put photos of our playgroup members outside of the closed group, I'd get pretty ratty about it too. As far as anything else is concerned, I only put up photos for the friend in question to see. Interestingly it appears that FB have recently changed their settings on photos - a couple of people I know have had trouble getting their photos to be seen, because the default setting appears to be Custom and Poster Only, and has to be changed to allow other people to see them. But this is based only on a very small sample, so it may not be the same for everyone.
It is worth knowing, and distributing the knowledge, that you can select whom you want to have access to your photos - but that doesn't stop other foolish people from breaching sense and security guidelines.

JM - hope JB feels better soon and I know exACTly what you mean - sometimes knowledge is more trouble than you'd like!

CMOTdibbler · 15/12/2011 08:46

tearoom special here - have been up all night and feel grim.

We have snow forecast for tomorrow, which will be a lovely start to the holidays

amberlight · 15/12/2011 09:29

CMOT, heck re feeing Hope it goes soon...

Likewise for those battling with all manner of other things at the mo. on.

Jacksmania · 15/12/2011 18:25

(((((CMOT)))))) (v gentle hug)

My thumb bloody hurts. Superglue didn't really help, so cracked bit hurts every time I have to use my thumb. Meh.
But - I just have to get through today (well, and tomorrow :)) and then I can be a couch-princess for a few days.

UniS · 15/12/2011 19:26

ohh heck, a FB like button has appeared at top of thread- nobody press the button- Ok. We do not know what will happen, perhaps teh whole tearoom will self destruct in 10 seconds.

Your don't know your born - as in,, "photos shared on't'internet, you don't know your born lass, in my day we had to take film to chemist, wait a week and then walk to aunty glad's house and show her the slides on uncle alfreds projector.

Jacksmania · 15/12/2011 19:32

Oh dear God - does that mean our entire thread could end up on FB???? If so, I vote we move our threads to Off The Beaten Track.

Am snacking on Salted Caramel Shortbread. It's deadly .

Here, I brought enough to share.

UniS · 15/12/2011 19:41

is off teh beaten track free of like button then?

::UniS goes to have a look:;

UniS · 15/12/2011 19:54

ummm, it is. hows about we move the tea room for a bit?

Scout19075 · 15/12/2011 20:05

That's fine.

Jacksmania · 15/12/2011 20:33

Sounds good to me. A lot of our lives are on these threads. You'd really have to look for them but it's there. I do NOT want all our stuff to be splatterable all over FB.

I know that's not a word and I don't care [frgin]

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