Complained about Nursery issues - got a 1 month Notice to leave

[Amy04]

I have been sending my 2yo twins to a nursery since a month now. There have been several shortcomings such as:
No updates on the day about my children - what did they do, what did they eat, how are they, their mood, activities, etc. Out of 1 month of going to nursery, I only received updates for 2 days.
Leaving my child with a bottle of milk from the morning till pick up time without cleaning the bottle, adding fresh milk or even trying to help him eat - my son eats well at home and seems to only have milk at the nursery.
Failing to provide warm milk because they cannot leave a member of staff to warm the milk - though they did mention they could warm milk on Day 1.

• a few more issues.

I raised this matter with them. I requested for a meeting to discuss these matters because I said I am not comfortable and I am worried for their well-being if they go to the nursery without having the opportunity to meet the manager and higher up to discuss these matters and come to a solution.

I spoke with them yesterday about this and requested a meeting. They have now sent me a 1 month Notice telling me that their investigation is over and my allegations about no updates and well being are unfounded and they have decided to give a notice.
They also had the cheek to ask if I wanted to send my kids during that 1 month.

I do not want to send my kids somewhere where the people involved in their care are blatantly lying in my face and fobbing me off. I wonder how many more lies I have been told - especially where I notice a change in behaviour and eating pattern of my child.

I dont think it is fair to be charging me with that 1 month nursery fee where I do not plan to send my kids there.

It seems they kicked my kids out because they did not want to deal with the issues I raised.

Where do I go from here?

I have a nursery kid age and neither myself, nor any of other parents have ever asked (or even hounded) nursery about the daily updates. You sound hard work and I'm not surprised at the outcome - I don't think any nursery will work for you, perhaps hire a child minder as someone else suggested.

Why is she unreasonable for expecting something they assured her they could do?

I think you have very unrealistic expectations for nursery.

DS started his nursery at aged 2, granted it’s a school nursery so I knew what I was getting but still:
-it’s 1:5 for the 2YOs
-1:12 with a qualified teacher for the 3-4YOs
-pack your own water bottle and only water is allowed
-eat the school lunch or bring a lunchbox but nothing can be heated
-no handover at all unless there’s a problem
-termly parents evening for progress and outside of that you’d need to make an appointment through the office
-there’s an app where you can message for stuff like Grandma will be picking up or they’re off sick but we’ve been told not to expect a reply
-a mass photo dump every few days like today I got 60 and my child was in 2

I do think your nursery sounds like it was guilty of over promising but asking for stuff like bottles to be warmed for a 2YO is v unusual and DC should be able to tell you themselves if they like nursery and had fun, or if they’re hungry at pick up, so you shouldn’t need long updates about their mood or meals.
I think maybe you need more personalised childcare and should consider getting a nanny.

They never assured her warm milk would be available on demand, they said it would be available. She can't expect them to leave the room understaffed to warm up milk for her boy at 8.30, but they may be able to at 10.

The point is, her children shouldn't need it in the first place as they're old enough.

Registration on Day 1:
"Yes, we can provide warm milk. We will currently warm in the microwave and will later have a hob to do so."

They should have made the timings clear at the same time.

It really doesn’t matter what you or anyone else thinks a two year old should have milk-wise, the fact is the OP was assured on day 1 they could warm his milk. They should have then clarified that immediately.

You're ludicrous - they said they "can" provide it and they can just not on demand. It's completely unreasonable to expect that for toddlers. Maybe she can offer this as a SAHM as no childcare setting I've ever heard of would do this as standard.

They should have just said a firm no to milk coming in in a bottle.
And only promised verbal handovers at pick up.
Poor communication and unrealistic expectations.

I’d hazard a guess and say this is the first time you left them in someone else’s care.
Sorry, but you are expecting too much, and I am sure the nursery does see you as THAT parent.
In toddler room, children are encouraged to drink from a cup, as well as feed themselves. It is impossible for each staff member to feed each child, encourage them - yes, but that is about it.

You also say that the nursery said you asked many questions each day, therefore you were getting a handover and was told what they ate/did/how long they slept.
As one of PP mentioned, such updates are only done in the baby room where the staff ratio is 1:3 (rather than 1:5 for 2-3 year old) and can just about be managed.
Did you get any observations done within this month? Any photos sent? There are no rules to the observations, as already that, EYFS has changed the rules around this as they are cutting on the paperwork so the practitioners can spend more time with the children, rather than being constantly on the app, and updating all the parents throughout the day.
Overall, sounds like the nursery isn’t the best fit for you and considering you are paying for two, maybe getting a nanny would be a better option?

Honestly it sounds like you aren't a good fit for them. I'd just move on. I can see that some of the issues might bother you, but also that it would be difficult to do them given the number of children in the nursery. When your kids are at a childcare place there needs to be trust. It sounds like you don't trust them and they don't want to spend the time required to build your trust.
Maybe keep them at home with you or go for a child minder or nanny.

You’re ludicrous in return.

If by ‘we can’ they actually meant ‘we can but only at certain times of the day’ then they should have used their grown up words and said so.

It wasn’t standard , it was a specific request from a parent they should have rejected as soon as it was made.

Ok, you do you sweetheart, you definitely are that parent 😂

Goodness me op. Are these your precious first borns?

Two year olds should be drinking out of cups and not bottles.
Imagine the time it takes to update you in multiple things per day. Would you not prefer that time spent with your children?

I think you’ll find nursery’s are like this. They aim to instil independence to young children, not pander to them with warm milk.

I think you’d be. Enter off with a nanny so you can micromanage your children’s care.

I'm slightly confused as to why a 2 year old is having bottles made up, don't 2 year olds drink milk out of cups?

I didn't get daily updates either, perhaps a new thing, we got half termly reports on meeting milestones

And you too, sweetheart 😂

The relationship has broken down. They've called an end to it. Move on.

It's not the nursery for your DC so I think they have done the right thing calling it a day and not trying to resolve the issues you raised.
Whether they can charge a month's fees in this situation depends on the contract you signed, it is likely they can.
I get that most 2-3 year olds don't have warm, bottled milk during the day so they are not set up for that. Nurseries are not a 121 service and you can't really expect that.
The level of communication you hoped for, and were assured of is disappointing but equally, I wouldn't want my childcare provider constantly taking pics and taking time out to update all of the parents and engage in conversation with them. I get it. But if it isn't for you, again, this is not the childcare setting for you.
Cut your losses and find somewhere more aligned with your wishes.

At 2, I'd expect a short handover at pick up time. I don't think it's appropriate to be texting for updates unless an emergency/they were very upset on you leaving and youre just checking they settled.

They shouldn't be giving milk in bottles at 2 at all. I'm pretty sure they're only supposed to give milk on open top cups.

They shouldn't be giving milk in bottles at 2 at all. I'm pretty sure they're only supposed to give milk in open top cups

I think that sippy cups with lids are better for 2 yo children.
But yes, not bottles.

YANBU. I don’t think it matters that EYFS changed two years ago if they said to you a month ago that you’d receive updates and photos. And I don’t see that it matters that most 2 year olds won’t have a bottle of warm milk if they told you they could provide your DC with warm milk. Of they aren’t able to do these things they shouldn’t tell parents the will.

They weren’t giving you the service they promised you OP. I would be really annoyed too. I’d also be reluctant to pay the month notice since it seems like they’ve not provided the service they said they would and won’t for the month notice either. But not sure how that would stand up in court, which is what matters, really, if you’re considering not paying.

At least you know they aren’t suitable and can find something better for your DC.

As you've said, you get a handover at the end of the day. You said you ask lots of questions at collection, I'm assuming they answer them. That's your handover. To be messaging the staff in the middle of the day with random questions ie 'has she noticed her brother isn't there' is excessive. You can't expect them to be spending all their time replying to messages, that time should be spent with the children in their care.

As pp have said, it's just too much OP

I’m more confused about why a two year old needs a bottle “made up”. Don’t you just pour it in?

I think a childminder would be better . A smaller more intimate setting.

Why are you still giving him a bottle? Are there developmental reasons? If not its REALLY bad for their teeth

They also had the cheek to ask if I wanted to send my kids during that 1 month. I think that's fair enough given the situation

Ofsted do not deal with things like this! They are a regulatory body, not a head office! They deal with serious safeguarding concerns, statutory and regulatory issues, inspections and registrations.