Newbie what "Mumsnet rules" do I need to know?.

[kerrymucklowe2020]

Hi
Just joined. Are there any "rules" I need to be aware of?

There are loads and loads of troll threads. Don’t get sucked in. There are some right weirdos on here 😅

If you are feeling a bit low as a penniless single mother on benefits, just ask your husband to book you a spa day.

I think I may have noticed that someone who flounced off when not agreed with on a thread, returned to cast aspersions on the sanity of those posters with another account? Or maybe I’m just speculating wildly.

You can swear as much as you like. But never, ever, say the words hubs. bubba, lil man

And watch out for the gym knickers troll

I do remember some heated arguments when I used to post here years ago. And there seemed to be some people with particular agendas to “create narratives” on the platform as well.

Oh and NEVER EVER google dragon butter.

You will regret it.

It is completely unreasonable to wonder if the baby's grandparents would babysit. Ever. Because you chose to have the baby.

But if they do babysit, for free, you must not question anything they do or have any expectations, such as using a car seat instead of having the baby on their lap with no seat belt. Also it's completely unreasonable to object to their feeding your baby pie and chips at 2 weeks.

I wish I'd known all this when I first joined!! I made some of the mistakes (replying to a ZOMBIE thread..got sucked in by a troll..didn't read the whole thread) but after 10! years and being ripped apart once I have learnt..Enjoy it OP it can be fun and very helpful..BTW I read the acronyms and CF was only Cystic Fibrosis..it can also stand for Controlling F**er..otherwise a lot of threads won't make sense!

Also if you don't mind me hijacking your thread Kerry..where is Classics?..I've tried to find it.
You must read Classics OP..you'll have tears of laughter or sadness and some of the threads will never leave you..Ever..

As you were..Found it..thanks anyway..

CF can also be a cheeky fucker.

Don't admit to opening your door if someone rings your doorbell. People will think you are weird.

If you have been dating someone for 6 months do not refer to him/her as your partner.

You can hide threads. I hide threads about people prepping for Christmas from April, everything 'trans' and baby names.

If a man finds you attractive and you have amazing sex and he stays the night at your place and you make him a cup of tea, you should not be happy , because he is a misogynistic sex obsessed cocklodger stuck in the 1950s.

Thanks all

Off to read classics!

If someone mentions they are childfree by choice, don't ask them why they are on a site called Mumsnet.

The answer to any question is likely to be one of these:

1. Cheeky f*cker shouldn't have parked there.
2. Leave the b*stard.
3. Are you a fecking idiot?

You can post any amount of made-up shite you’d like as long as you start with-

“NC for this but penis beaker, Pom Bears, Mexican holiday home thief...”

Ssach hilarious!! Screaming. Cancel. 101. Send me a prize.

If Kerry Mucklowe’s your real name then it’s probably a good idea to use something different unless you’re absolutely sure you don’t mind your neighbour or a family member coming across your posts.

Every other poster apart from yourself is married to Mr Perfect. The neighbour, the BFF and the female underling at the office are all after him. On the upside: this is a woman-friendly site, it's definitely his fault for not realising he's not meant to be living next door to a woman he's not married to!

All posts about cats must be accompanied by a picture of said cat.

WAG means Word Association Game, not Wives and Girlfriends of Footballers

Try and use the correct spelling, grammar and punctuation if at all possible. Failure to do this may derail your thread and reduce your credibility. Text speak is frowned upon by many, though MN-approved abbreviations are not only acceptable, but encouraged.

Can't believe the sapphire baby name threads are a troll. I Love that name (vetoed by DH)