Crashed the day after I passed my test. Gutted 😕

[AlexRose5]

Hi everyone, I'm new to mumsnet. I have three sons (11, 4, 1) and two step daughters ((7,8) . I left it so very long to learn to drive and each time I tried, one thing or another snagged it along the way. My son was diagnosed with Kawasakis diseases at 8 months old and the knock on effect from that has been he's only just began to sleep through the night in the past year. Driving lessons were pretty hellish after being up round the clock with a poorly boy . Eventually I got back into lessons and I was so over the moon to have passed my test. I've literally put my life on the back burner since my son got ill and my head has been down making sure the kids get all they need from me 24/7, so this license was a little bit of indepennce for me, no more hour long school runs on foot in the rain 🙏🏻 I went out for my first full day in the car on my own, and managed 6 hours without a mishap, even did motorways , I was so chuffed. It came to 5 PM so decided to call it a day. My husband was driving ahead of me in his car with the kids so I was following him home. I came to a crossroads and turned right , as the traffic to the left of me was in a queue turning right so I was clear and there amwas no car coming straight . Did my checks, crossed over, and out of nowhere a car went straight across my path and we bumped 😢 My husband ran over to check all were OK and got the other ladys car off the road etc, did everything we thought was right. I wasn't hurt but my car is damaged, luckily I was going at creeping speed. The other car was much worse 😢 A man at the scene says he saw the other lady behind the queuing traffic for turning right, got impatient and came outta the queue across the cycle lane and took off straight which is when we collided. I didn't sleep last night and I've not stopped crying since. She says she doesn't know who's fault it was and I'm questioning who's fault it was too so it's 50/50 on fault from what I'm told, but I keep kicking myself. Thank God my kids were in my husbands car. Thank God this lady had no kids in her car. It's going on loop around my head nonstop and I'm so gutted I just wanted to be able to get the kids around easier, now I wish i had never looked at a car. Sorry to ramble on , but I'm taking this really hard and I feel so gutted 😢

[AlexRose5]

Jenijena thank you x I'm just feeling really bummed out right now and I was in top of the world that I had passed 😕 I'm just worried about what happens next and what it means for me, I'm worrying myself into a state I really am 😳 X

[MissDallas]

She came out of the queue, straddled the cycle lane and part of the left-turn-only lane, undercut her queue of traffic to proceed straight, which is when we collided.

Hmmm... it sounds like she was at fault. Don't let your lack of confidence convince you otherwise.

I had a nasty accident when I was a new driver, pregnant and with someone else in the back seat. It was my fault, though. I turned right from the far left lane on a red light straight into oncoming traffic. We were hit by a truck and four other cars. I could have killed us. I vowed there and then I would never drive again. But I had to.

I am an awesome driver now. People comment on my awesome driving. I wouldn't normally brag about this, but just to let you know you can become a really good driver and you might not have another accident ever again. I try every single day to become a better driver, I never get complacent and I think this is why my driving is as good as it is.

You'll be fine - really.

[MissDallas]

... I think you should go back to the scene of the accident. Have a look to see if there is an unbroken line between her lane and the bicycle lane. If so, none of her car should go over the line. And she has broken the law.

[AlexRose5]

MissDallas thank you 🌷 I'm feeling the very same I am pure terrified Omar the prospect of driving again, but I know I have to. I'm dragging kids through all weathers on school runs all because I left it so late to learn to drive and it's unfair to them 😕 For this reason I will make myself drive again and God willing I'll get to the same point as you and be quite confident in my driving x

[AlexRose5]

MissDallas we've been back and photographed it and all, it is a broken cycle lane , it along with along with a concreate bollard at the end , separates a lane for left turns only, and the lane with the straight arrow. She was in the lane with the straight arrow but stuck behind her queue of traffic that at least three cars I front of her were indicating right, so she would have had a wait til she could carry on straight, she came out of the queue and onto the cycle lane and partially into the left-turn-only lane to undertake her lane of traffic and get to the front of the queue to carry on straight, it was Egan she came out from behind these cars that we collided x

[AlexRose5]

Hi to everyone who posted 🌷 My husband has spend a couple of hours on the phone to our insurers and will be sending off the relevant diagrams etc this afternoon . I've no idea how long it takes for insurers to decide what the outcome is, so I guess I just have to wait now. I'm glad the ball is actually now rolling towards a conclusion I can only hope it's sooner rather than later but I have no idea whatsoever . I was feeling really lost til I put this post on here and even though it's still not all done and dusted I feel less anxious for having got it off my chest and had some very wise advice from all who relied to my post . I know you all have your own lives and it really is very much appreciated that you took the time to reply to me because I have been seriously going out of my mind xxx thanks all of you , I hope to GOD that one way or another this all gets resolved soon xxx

[Ratbagcatbag]

One thing I will say is don't expect a quick resolution. My dh had a prang (was rear ended and it shoved him into car in front), it took seven months to resolve. Mainly radio silence from insurers once our car was repaired. It went fine and he was not at fault at all.
50/50 means equal fault on you're accident so in effect your insurance company fix yours I think and hers fix her car. It will be fine. I'm now 12 years down the line and a fab driver (if I do say so myself). 😆😆

[AlexRose5]

Ratbagcatbag I guess it could be a lot more long winded than I anticipated then 😳 But as long as I get to a point where it's decided and I can move on then I'll be relieved because I can't seem to get past it right now , it's a big scary thing hanging over my head and I just want to get back to normal x

[passportmess]

Congrats on learning to drive Alexrose. I'm in awe . I've never learned to drive and to be honest have no desire to but you wanted to and you did it. Don't let this incident hold you back. Keep on keeping on.

[AlexRose5]

Passportmess thank you for the kind message 🌷😊 I hope this will be soon behind melons way or another x

[AlexRose5]

Behind melons? 😳 Behind me one way or another that meant to read lol

[Ratbagcatbag]

Now you've given your details in, they will sort out the fixing of cars (assuming you're fully comprehensive). The lawyers will then argue who's fault it was and agree to settle how they see fit. It's annoying but you will just get generic updates which can be months between, until you finally get a letter saying it's settled. Honestly, it's just the wheels turn so slowly. Just carry on driving your then repaired car. It will be fine. :)

[TheFairyCaravan]

AlexRose don't let this incident hold you back. It doesn't sound like it was your fault. It was unlucky that you were there in the wrong place at the wrong time.

I hope the insurers sort it out as swiftly as possible for you.

[AlexRose5]

Thank you Ratbagcatbag 🙂 Yes im insured fully comp, this has been an experience and a half so far I tell you that much. x

[AlexRose5]

TheFairyCaravan thank you 🌸 I really hope so too is like nothing more than to move on from this mess x

[Jenijena]

From the various incidents I've claimed for, what sort of happens is the insurers sort it out (usually by getting a local garage to ring you and sort out a repair). You'll pay your excess to the insurers and everything else is sorted through the insurers and the repairers. You'll have to send a written account of what happened. A long time later you'll get a letter and, if you were found not to be at fault, your excess reimbursed.

I know, because I remember how I felt, that you'll feel like the stupidest driver in the world etc etc... But really you are not! The absolute best thing you can do is get in the car and drive again, the experience will make you a better driver.

[AlexRose5]

Thank you Jenijena 🌸 You're right, I really do feel stupid then I kick myself because I know in my heart of hearts I followed procedure and if I had been at fault if actually be the first to stand up and admit it. I couldn't cope with the guilt of injuring someone and damaging their car, let alone be hard faced enough to try to then blame them 😳 But she honestly came out of nowhere, at a pretty fast speed too,and my head is blagged because I am feeling so stupid regardless. I will breath a sigh of relief when tgis is behind me that's for sure x

[MissDallas]

When I was new to driving, my husband gave me two tips:

1. Look properly all the time
When changing lanes, I turn my whole upper body to have a good look before I pull out. I probably check my rear view mirror about every 10 seconds. I am forever looking in my wing mirrors and when I look back to the road, I try to recall what is going on around me. This saved our lives once when a lady in a truck (this was in the US) pulled out from a slip road without looking. I didn't have time to check if there was anything in the next lane before I swerved into it, but I knew there wasn't as I had been looking properly all along the road.

2. Don't drive too slowly
You need to drive at the same speed as the rest of the traffic, even if they are slightly above the speed limit. Slow drivers cause a lot more accidents than fast ones, when there is traffic, apparently.

Hope these tips help.

[AlexRose5]

MissDallas it helps more than you could realise 🌸 I may screen shot it if that's ok with you 👍🏻. I'm not too proud to take advice and I'm really grateful for you taking the time to give me any x my aim now is to wait for the insurers next move and move on myself hopefully in a new run around . I will put your advice into practice . I hope I get on the road soon as I think the longer I leave it the harder it will be to get behind the wheel x

[passportmess]

We had to wait a wee while after dh passed his driving test to buy a car. he paid for an extra lesson just before buying the car just to get a run around in a car and to check he hadn't picked up bad habits during the lull.

Even if you just get out round your neighbourhood initially. Do keep driving though Alex

[AlexRose5]

Passportmess I totally agree, I already feel like I'm going stale by not being out in a car 😳 Even when I was only doing lessons I've have been out for a coupledom hours by now this week . Not sure how quickly the insurance will replace my car (pretty certain it's not financially worth a repair) as I am fully comp I'm hoping that they will shell out for me to buy a replacement soon but I don't even know how long that part of it all takes. X

[passportmess]

I don't know how things work Alex but could the insurance company provide for a temporary replacement car? Do you have cover for this?

[LadyLayLay]

I think you were bloody brave to get out there on your own so soon! Don't worry about the crash. Doesn't even sound like it was your fault.

It took me three goes to pass my test and a year after that before I felt confident enough to drive around the block on my own!! Even now I get cold sweats thinking about driving

[AlexRose5]

Hi Passportmess 🌷 The option of a hire car was an add on and I didn't take it, I just thought being fully comp was enough to cover all eventualities and wasn't banking on having to call upon it at all x

[AlexRose5]

LadyLayLay thank you 🌷 I think I was just so chuffed to have passed and I was actually really enjoying driving around, right up til that happened anyway x