Support thread for women who suspect or know they have ASD traits or are on the spectrum

[OxfordBags]

Hello, all! As the title says, I hope this can be a support thread for those of us who suspect or know we have some (or many) Aspergic traits; where we can share experiences, stories, problems, worries, knowledge and info, and hopefully benefit and help each other too.

I found a great link a while ago that is very comprehensive in its description of how Asperger's presents in women and how women experience it. Some of it is strikingly different from the male model and how most people perceive Asperger's. Here: ASD in women

I truly believe two things: 1) that ASD in females is woefully misunderstood and under-diagnosed and 2) that our current understanding and the definition of the AS Spectrum is, in itself, rather ASD in its rigidity, and that there is an actual spectrum of traits much broader and more nuanced than the current model, and that there are a hell of a lot of people struggling with some very typical ASD traits, who nevertheless do not have all the traits required to fulfil a formal diagnosis of having Asperger's or High-Functioning Autism.

So, with that rather typically ASD-style long-winded and unnecessarily detailed intro out of the way, let's chat!

Yes me too! I very nearly cancelled. Actually I feel like I can get my life on track now - got a referral for free WW sessions (I really need to start eating better) and also for an endoscopy as I've having some swallowing problems. All together should mean I'm feeling better soon.

I'm really pleased to hear you sounding so much more hopeful ALittle
Here's a big pat on the back because YOU have set the wheels in motion yourself, YOU made the appointment, YOU went and YOU told it like it is, that's a fabulous achievement for someone who was so debilitated, WELL DONE YOU, no apologies for shouting,

Well done faith, not sure anyone can say yes or no to an adult who's learnt strategies and survival techniques over their whole life.
I'm taking my mum to my appointment as she can do the childhood sstuff
Better than me.

Aw thanks ladies :) since I saw that thread a few weeks ago, I've realised that I do feel I'm pretending to most people most of the time. Be normal, what am I meant to say? I'm coping a lot better now we have a cleaner as I feel the pressure from cleaning has been lifted from me. Unfortunately my mum died 7 years ago (she had cancer) Weirdly I admitted to DH a while back that in some ways it was like I had justification for being like I was, grieving for her gave me that permission. Does that make sense? I have my Dad still but Mum very much wore the trousers and was mostly at home, I'm not sure how much he remember or how much he really understood. A bit more reading and online testing shows an indication for bipolar. I don't get really 'manic' but I do have hyperactive periods. Will be interesting to see what the psychologist says.

Sometimes I can't get over how life-changing MN is. I had amazing support on here when we had fertility problems. I would never have imagined I might have ASD or bipolar until I read that thread yet it explains so much!

Well the paperwork has come through for me to ring about my assessment. Psyching myself up.

How do you find gift giving? DH's birthday is coming up and I'm stressing massively. He's 30 so I want to treat him. He hates surprises and can't think of anything he wants! It's making me stressed.

Aaarrrrgggghhhhh, is it just me or does anyone else wish MNHQ had warned us about the changes to the format of the talk pages!!!

Sorry I know I dont often appear on here but those that know me will vouch for me

Thanks batman

I have switched to the laptop because the mobile site driving me bonkers!!

It might help me to reduce the amount of time I waste spend on MN

I saw on the site stuff thread it is a glitch so hopefully they will put it right!

Im a bit late to this thread but lurked from the beginning and having absorbed it all and realised this is me. No question. It's been quite liberating really and I finally feel like I know 'what's wrong with me' IYKWIM.

Something I have been thinking about more and more is my childhood and my mum. She is what would be labelled a narc on here. She's a funny woman, has lots of the self absorbed traits and is always saying hurtful, inappropriate things. Not many people understand her. She spent my entire childhood sitting alone in the kitchen listening to the radio.

She's been an alcoholic most of my life which complicates things but I now suspect she is on the spectrum too. I think her mum, my lovely quirky nan was also on the spectrum.

Having spent a long time and lots of therapy and MH issues later trying to work through my experiences with her, I am now seeing it differently and it fits much better. Can anyone relate to that?

superworm: welcome! I am also trying to see my mum differently but more from an add point of view. I find it difficult because I don't want any kind of neurological disorder to give an excuse to her sometimes bad behaviour.
polter I.e assessment, have you thought about going private if you can, it might give you more control over the outcome.
holey good luck with the neurologist! just remember that you know the truth! Unfortunately there Are still a lot of ignorant people out there when it comes to asd and women and perhaps this is a good opportunity for you to educate some professionals .