Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Mumsnet webchats

WEBCHAT GUIDELINES: 1. One question per member plus one follow-up. 2. Keep your question brief. 3. Don't moan if your question doesn't get answered. 4. Do be civil/polite. 5. If one topic or question threatens to overwhelm the webchat, MNHQ will usually ask for people to stop repeating the same question or point.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

MNHQ

Live chat with Dr Tanya Byron, Thursday 6 September between 1-2pm

414 replies

OliviaMumsnet · 03/09/2007 14:01

Hi all
We're delighted to announce that Dr Tanya Byron will be here for an online chat with Mumsnetters this Thursday, 6 September.

Tanya is a practicing consultant in child and adolescent mental health and has two children of her own. Her new parenting book Your Child, Your Way encourages you to really think about the kind of parent you are and the kind you want to be, but mostly to understand your child.

Tanya will be joining us for an hour on Thursday at 1 o'clock, so grab your sarnies, get your questions ready and join us then.

For those of you who have unavoidable lunchtime commitments, we'll let you post your questions in advance here.

Thanks, MNHQ

For the rest of you, we'll see you on the 6th.

OP posts:
UnquietDad · 03/09/2007 18:32

Mmmm, my question would be the same as 2happy's. For different reasons...

jaynehater · 03/09/2007 18:35
TheArmadillo · 03/09/2007 18:40

Ooh I've got a question (sorry long one).

How do you cope with a child that associates food with stomach pain and so is not too fond of eating. We've progressed to eating everyday and at least 1-2 small meals. But we still can't get him to eat meat/fish/pulses and are worried about his protein intake. He also won't eat sauces or food mixed up. He'll try new fruits and vegs but not protein based foods.

If we push him, or get him distressed he refuses to eat. If really distressed this refusal to eat can last several days so not keen on doing it. He's also not good at eating if his normal circumstances change - if we go out for the day or something similar.

HOw do you get them to eat new foods? WE've tried bribing him (with stickers and photos), refusing to let him leave table if he doesn't try a tiny bit, just leaving food on plate (he takes it off) and we're running out of ideas. He won't put it anywhere near his mouth.

He is nearly 3 and this has been going on since he was 7-8 months. We haven't made any progress in last year or so.

LaCod · 03/09/2007 18:55

i want to ask

" tanya on HOTT did oyu ever want to say to the parents" hwat the fuck do you htink woudl happen to a kid if oyu gave him 30 yogurts a day you UTTER morons"

or not?

oh and tanya did oyu read the hoo ha on here baout the mum who was on your show nad saw us slaggin her and came on?

lionheart · 03/09/2007 19:00

I'd like to ask something similar cod.

About how hard it must be to be diplomatic and constructive all the time (and not gnaw through your cardigan during the course of the day).

Peachy · 03/09/2007 19:01

Any tips on preparing a barely verbal 4 year old with ASd for a new baby please? His older Brothers get i the idea (and we have plenty of time) but have no idea how to prepare my youngest at all. Thank you (will be at SALT appointment Thursday)

LaCod · 03/09/2007 19:03

tanya tell us abotu your panchant fo neckerchiefs like this - i htink we talked baout htis all last year
adn also
ir ead your dh is vegan

is that attractive?

LaCod · 03/09/2007 19:09

ooha nd tanya why did you never reply when i wrote to you at the times abotu ds1s ultra competitiveness

LaCod · 03/09/2007 19:10

AND I WONT BE HERE AS DS3 IS HAVIGN AN OP ON THURSDYA AFTER NOON
YOU BUGGERS AT MN HQ

ebaldy · 03/09/2007 19:18

I ahve a question for Tanya, do you have any recomendations for getting a 20mth old to have his lunchtime sleep in his cot without having to go for a drive to get him to sleep, it is beginning to wear both me and his grandma down as she looks after him when I work and all he does is climb out of his cot and screams at the door if you leave him. He definately needs his sleep because if he doesn't get any he is a little terror and I think I need him to have it too to have that break from him at lunch!
any advice would be wonderful and if you want to move in with us that would be lovely as well!!
I also look forward to your comments on the question above regarding computer games my 6yr old DS1 would play all day if I let him I do restrict but wonder what you do?
Thank you

drosophila · 03/09/2007 19:42

Hello Dr Tanya

Always wanted to ask this one:

I have a son with serious allergies (epi pens etc) to egg, chickpeas, nuts, sesame seeds and bananas. They are the food allergies. He also has allergies to Dog, Cat possibly exercise induced anaphalixis (still to investigate this in hosp) so you can imagine food has always been a stress to us and to him.

In a recent hosp apt they weighed him and he had put on 100 grams since March. He is 7. He would quite happily not eat for hours and hours.

His lack of desire for him to try new things is more marked than other kids. I am always a little tense as he could react and he just says he doesn't want it. His diet is very restricted due in part ot his allergies to also his extreme fussiness.

Any tips on how we can relax around his not eating and the fear that x or y food may bring on a response. Any books we could read.

puffling · 03/09/2007 19:45

Hi Tanya. I have a question. Do you have any tips on the stage between 16 monthsish and 2, when your toddler is starting to have tantrums but doesn't yet really know right from wrong.

NappiesGalore · 03/09/2007 19:49

i have aquestion;

how much would it take to get you to come and live in for a few days and then advise as neccessary?? or even, to install the hidden camerasfor a week first to get a real view of life en casa galore...

id pay vast amounts for that privilege. really. no, seriously. i am not in any way joking.

LadyTophamHatt · 03/09/2007 20:03

Cod, its so good to see you back. I actually think I've missed you and your typos

ok, carry on....

LIZS · 03/09/2007 20:11

How do you differentiate between parents who may unconsciously trigger and nuture their children's issues and those whose children have inherent issues (but not SN) beyond parent's remit ?

Did you preselect a mix of issues for HOTT to illustrate a cross section of points, choose families with complementary problems or was it the luck of the draw as to who had applied ?

Did you ever feel that education and psychological practice took second place to entertainment on HOTT etc. To what extent do you fear that line has been crossed since nad what impact has that had ?

Bear · 03/09/2007 20:15

Cod back and Dr Tanya coming on Thursday - it's like Christmas and birthdays all rolled into one! Woo and indeed hoo!

Could there be a live video feed as I find that I understand things better if I can see the person explaining them....or maybe a comp: best question gets to come to MNHQ to make Dr Tanya a cup of tea...

emkana · 03/09/2007 20:15

Well, I don't really need to be here for the live chat...

because I'll be seeing the adorable Dr. Tanya Byron in person on stage at the Cheltenham Festival of Literature!

Yeah, can't wait!

Bear · 03/09/2007 20:19

aw sod best question - I make a really good cup of tea and will pop into Waitrose for some top-drawer biccies on the way

gothicmama · 03/09/2007 20:22

Question for Tanya how can you support a child who feels no-one likes them and thinks mum does because she has to. thank you in advance

lionheart · 03/09/2007 20:47

I'd like to ask about signs of OCD in children, please.

Where is the line drawn, clinically speaking, between usual mechanisms for dealing with anxiety (not stepping on the cracks in the pavement, etc)

and the compulsions (verbal or physical, or mental) which demand a more careful and considered approach?

LoveMyGirls · 03/09/2007 20:53

Id really like to know how to deal with...
spitting with a child aged just 2 (this can be either spraying spit for up to 10 minutes and ignoring you when you ask him to stop or chewing food and spitting it out either onto the plate or across the room)
Biting, hitting and kicking.
Refuses to eat or when he does he chews and spits or throws it everywhere.

(I'm his childminder and he has been with me a few months now, i'd like to be able to work past this behaviour as he can be such a pleasant child)

Thanks very much! Love your work!

MrsJohnCusack · 03/09/2007 21:13

oh I'll be asleep (well theoretically - will be in the bedroom anyway)

will try to think of question

FromGirders · 03/09/2007 21:16

I'd like to ask which trivial things she sees parents doing (in supermarkets for example) that really make her see red, in an AIBU fashion.

And I'd also really like to thank her for all her programs. They started when ds1 was tiny, and really made me think about how i wanted to be as a parent, rather than just copying what my mum had done with me.

lemur · 03/09/2007 21:27

I would be interested in your view on whether you think that, on balance, children lose out or benefit from being at nursery rather than at home with a parent or relative. Assuming you think it is more grey than black and white, what in your view are the benefits/disadvantages (i.e. socialisation/speech development/insecurities...) of young children being cared for in a group of their own age rather than on their own.

Thank you in advance.

luckylady74 · 03/09/2007 21:50

i'd like to ask what dr tanya thinks of the recent research that showed day time naps of longer than 10 minutes to be detrimental to the development of older toddlers? my 2 yr old twins still have an hour in the day as well as their 12 at night.
i'd also like to ask do the techniques i've seen used with food refusing children on the house of tiny tearaways such as persevering with the same item of food, still apply when the child has anxiety issues? my 5yr old has aspergers syndrome and a very limited diet which he is reducing by the week!