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Guest blog from Gina Miller: ‘’If you want to make a difference, you have to be prepared to put your head above the parapet’’

97 replies

RachelMumsnet · 05/09/2018 12:22

The pursuit of fame for fame’s sake seems a peculiarly modern phenomenon; and having experienced a degree of notoriety since becoming the lead claimant in the 2016 constitutional case against the UK government over triggering Article 50, I find it harder than ever to comprehend why anyone would actively seek it.

I am aware, however, that in today’s world, especially with social – or as I call it, anti-social – media, if you want to make a difference, you have to be prepared to put your head above the parapet – and that often means accepting a certain level of attention on yourself.

It was my father who first made me understand this. After starting out as a petrol attendant aged 14, with very little schooling, he became a barrister through sheer determination, intelligence and drive, before going on to become Attorney General of Guyana. When he came back from work, my father would talk to me about the cases he had heard that day, not shirking from telling me of those times he felt he had let people down, or had not been able to achieve what he had hoped to. This was particularly emotional for him as a criminal barrister in a country that has the death penalty.

He had considerable weight on his shoulders – among the many cases he took on, he defended a number of political activists who were wrongly accused under the dictatorship of Guyanese President Forbes Burnham – but his belief in what he was doing prevented him from stepping out of the often-harsh limelight. He showed me that you can be in the public eye and maintain your core values – and how one person’s actions can genuinely make a difference.

My parents sent me and my brother to England to escape the increasing civil unrest in Guyana under Burnham, so it is perhaps unsurprising that the erosion of civil liberties has always been something that I have spoken out about, knowing the damage that can be inflicted on a nation as those liberties are destroyed.

There have been other personal experiences throughout my life that have forced me to face up to harsh realities: the ending of two marriages, one of which resulted in me fleeing with my daughter while my violent partner was out of the house; that same, miraculous daughter – Lucy-Ann – having been starved of oxygen at birth, has brain damage, which means she has the reading age of a six-year-old despite being 30 this year; dealing with everyday sexism and racism when working in the City; and the next-level abuse and threats I have experienced since taking the government to court.

There’s no denying that those moments – which I talk about with great honesty in my memoir, Rise, hit me hard. But if they taught me anything, it is that you must care about yourself enough to keep going and speak up for yourself when no one else will. That is something that is often easier said than done, but if you keep using your voice in those difficult moments, like a muscle it will get stronger; you will get stronger.

If I ever need to remind myself to keep speaking up, I just look to Lucy-Ann. Her name means ‘light’, and through my darkest times she has been just that to me. She has a very direct way of thinking: if she sees someone sleeping rough on the street, she wants to invite them home; to her it is that simple. When I was receiving abuse for the legal challenge over triggering Article 50, Lucy-Ann said, ‘But that happens a lot, mummy. Quite a lot of people don’t like you’, which made me laugh. Her straightforward approach is refreshing and helps ground me. It is also thinking about her and my other children’s futures that keeps me going when I start to flag, or question if what I am doing is worth the vitriol aimed at me.

My father showed me how one person standing up for what they believe can achieve remarkable things. But he also taught me that sometimes it simply isn’t possible to do it alone. What I believe in more than anything is individuals who want to do the right thing speaking up and coming together – rising together – for the better good. There is strength in numbers, and the more we can find unity over the issues and worries facing us today, the sooner we will create the brighter future we, our children and grandchildren desire and deserve.

Gina Miller is the author of Rise: Life Lessons in Speaking Out, Standing Tall & Leading the Way (Canongate Books, £12.99 hardback). She joins us here on the bottom of this guest post for a webchat on Thursday 6th September at 9pm. Post your questions here in advance if you can’t make it on the day.

OP posts:
GinaMiller · 06/09/2018 21:20

@Greensmurf1

How do you keep frustration, disillusionment and compassion-fatigue at bay? The fight to preserve civil liberties and stem the tide of racism, sexism, xenophobia, fascism and other forms of oppression feels never-ending. How do you keep going, and how do you choose your battles?

Thanks!

Dear Greensmurf1

I started by choosing the battles that were most personal to me, where I had the closest connections, understanding and knowledge. The little wins made me stronger and meant my confidence and ambition grew. It became a habit and part of who I am. Activism not only becomes a personality trait and part of what defines you - it is also an incredibly rewarding feeling to know that you can help others. I hope you find my book helpful in your own fights.

TooMuchPenis · 06/09/2018 21:23

The level of sexual and racial violence to me and my family I was not.

I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I'm even sorrier that I am not a tiny bit surprised. Do you have any thoughts on what could be done regarding safety online and trolling abuse?

GinaMiller · 06/09/2018 21:26

@twofingerstoEverything

Another one who just wants to applaud you for doing what should not have been necessary in a country like the UK. Thank you so much for doing what is right and for being brave and strong in the face of so much vitriol. I had started to despair of this country, but people like you give me hope. Flowers Star Flowers

Dear TwofingerstoEverything - I should never had to take the court case against the government or put myself and my family in harms way. It is our tax money that pay politicians, we elect, to safeguard our democracy, security and national prosperity. Unfortunately too many are just using that money to look after themselves and their own naked ambition.

I have no intention of stop fighting on all our behalves.

Mrslifecrisis · 06/09/2018 21:27

Gina, another one who thinks you’re awesome and loved the way you wiped the floor with Farage on the Marr show. How did it feel having to share a sofa with him and how did you resist the urge to punch him?

lalalonglegs · 06/09/2018 21:28

Hi Gina - I think I win the no. 1 fan prize, I have a framed photo of you on my wall Blush Smile. My question is, in your opinion, what is the one action any individual can take in stopping Brexit?

I'm looking forward to reading your book.

Guest blog from Gina Miller: ‘’If you want to make a difference, you have to be prepared to put your head above the parapet’’
BigChocFrenzy · 06/09/2018 21:28

You sound very calm and focused, Gina

Are you usually like this, or does your heart sometimes pound when you realise the stakes for which you are fighting ?

FannyAdmin · 06/09/2018 21:31

Gina, can you comment regarding the proposed changes to the gender recognition act (GRA), in particular with regard to the safeguarding of women and children?

GinaMiller · 06/09/2018 21:32

@TeaAddict235

I really enjoyed listening to you Gina on Woman's Hour yesterday. It was captivating. I would have loved to hear more about your upbringing and earlier life until your marriages (for that I'll have to buy the book Grin), as I too have heritage from a similar neighbouring country and essentially love to read more from writers with varied backgrounds.

Could you suggest some writers who have inspired you in your lifetime please?

Thank you and keep up the amazing work! God bless

Dear TeaAddict235 - In my book I do write about my childhood, background, challenges and failures that have contributed to who I am today.

Whilst many writers have inspired me, it is the real stories from the people I take the time to talk to - in all walks of life - especially small heroic community charities that inspire and humble me.

AnalUnicorn · 06/09/2018 21:33

Gosh, these are all very pro-Gina questions. Are they being moderated ?

StripeyMonkey1 · 06/09/2018 21:33

Thank you Gina for everything you have done in relation to Brexit and for stepping up when it was really needed.

TooMuchPenis · 06/09/2018 21:34

Well, you just post anal. SO I guess that answers your question Hmm Mn doesn't moderate questions.

Caffeinesolution · 06/09/2018 21:36

Hi Gina,

Thanks so much for what you are doing, and as others have said, you're a real inspiration. I'm so looking forward to reading your book. Was there ever a book which inspired or really moved you - as a child or adult? I'd love to get a few recommendations from you to add to my list Smile

TooMuchPenis · 06/09/2018 21:36

Gina, can you comment regarding the proposed changes to the gender recognition act (GRA), in particular with regard to the safeguarding of women and children?

As someone who is wholly against any changes to the GRA, can I please ask that we all just leave this one off the agenda as 1. We have no idea if Ms Miller has any idea of it and therefore may not want to make a comment without first understanding the facts, and 2. She's just explained she has just spent 2 years being abused. Lets' not add another year to it?

borntobequiet · 06/09/2018 21:39

Thank you Gina. I heard you speak at the last People’s Vote March and was impressed. Do you have views on how the electoral system can be reformed to break the disenfranchising FPTP system? Or more pragmatically, how can we overcome the current logjam in British politics without reform? Is there a real chance of a new centrist party?

StripeyMonkey1 · 06/09/2018 21:39

AnalUnicorn - I think a lot of us owe a real debt of gratitude to Gina and are grateful for the opportunity to express it.

Her detractors have certainly had a chance to have a go, mostly for pretty dubious reasons. I think she had been very gracious when faced with a lot of very unpleasant and personal abuse.

I also think that, for the most part, even those on Mumsnet who do not agree with Gina respect her for what she has done and appreciate that on a personal level she has not been treated fairly.

GinaMiller · 06/09/2018 21:41

@catlady3

First of all, thank you so much for everything you have done for this country.

Early on in the Brexit process, you said that you were worried that after the French and German elections, the UK government may just walk away from negotiations and crash out of the EU, while blaming this on the EU being unreasonable etc. The EU-blaming has certainly continued, so I'm wondering how you judge the risk of a no-deal exit now, and whether there are any other issues around the negotiations / exit you are particularly concerned about, and where you see the People's Vote campaign fit with all this.

Dear Catlady3 - the most challenging element of Brexit now is the timeline which is really 10 weeks before the legal process of ratification starts. I can see the animosity and blaming the other side amplifying. I just wish the lying would end, and politicians from all sides just tell the truth - this chaos and waste of time, money, and ignoring domestic policy making must end soon. I also fear a fudged agreement that just kicks the can down the road for 22 months will provide a false sense of certainty that just means we'll be in the same place but at a later date. A vote - either via an election or a people's vote must offer all options so we can draw a line under Brexit, whatever the outcome, and start to heal the divides in our country.

GinaMiller · 06/09/2018 21:42

@NetofLemons

Gina you are a real hero to me. So principled and very brave. Thank you. Flowers

Dear NetofLemons - Thank you - flowers are my favorite thing!

GinaMiller · 06/09/2018 21:47

@AsleepAllDay

I'm a Remainer at heart while looking in despair at some of the tactics, I heard Gina on Channel 4 and found her really articulate and principled. She's right about how the abuse she fears most being from the people who make the most effort to send it her way.

That said, the pursuit of fame isn't really a modern phenomena - just look at Marilyn Monroe, Wallis Simpson etc

Anyway, am more interested and may even read the book now! Props to you for acknowledging and talking about how race comes into how some people treat you

Dear AsleepAllDay - I've read many famous women's life stories - Marilyn Monroe, Sophia Loren, Billie Holiday, Betty Davis, Coo Chanel - and what i can say is that all these women struggles and behind the facade they not just had their demons but fought to overcome them - some more successfully than others. In my book I expose mine. I hope you do me the honour of reading my book.

GinaMiller · 06/09/2018 21:48

@Mrsr8

I keep trying to articulate what I want to say.

And failing.

So I will simply say, from me, a woman, a mother, a UK citizen...

Thank you

Dear Mrs* - your words were perfect.

Mrsr8 · 06/09/2018 21:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GinaMiller · 06/09/2018 21:50

@woman11017

^So I will simply say, from me, a woman, a mother, a UK citizen... Thank you^ That works for me Smile Thank you Gina Miller. Flowers May the road rise with you.

Dear Woman11017 - we must all rise and defend the country we want for our selves and our children. We should all think about planting a tree under whose shade we may never sit under.

FannyAdmin · 06/09/2018 21:53

TooMuchPenis, I think you're right. Apologies, I would like to retract my question 🙂.

GinaMiller · 06/09/2018 21:53

@parklives

Thanks Gina for everything that you have done and will do. The haters gonna hate, you are above that.

Dear Parklives - Thank you. In my book I tell of what I've learnt from failing and having to pick myself up many times - and yes what has made me go high when they go low.

GinaMiller · 06/09/2018 21:59

@chloem93

The amount of treacherous anti democratic fools on this post. This woman is standing up for a cause huh? Trying to take away the power to vote. She's no hero and a traitor. Maybe she should go and live in Brussels as she likes it so much.

Dear Chloem93 - I was and will carry on defending democracy, and people's rights. If Mrs May had been able to use the ancient Prerogative Power and bypassed Parliament , your rights and vote would have been destroyed. 400 years of democracy would have been rolled back to Henry VIII's time. I am no hero but I am no traitor either.

RachelMumsnet · 06/09/2018 22:01

That brings us to the end of the hour. A huge thank you to Gina for getting through so many questions this evening and for giving over your time to writing the guest post and joining us tonight.

Congrats to Catlady3, lalalonglegs and Hazardswan who have each won a copy of Rise. We'll be in touch to organise delivery of your books.

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