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Original poster

AIBU to let my children chalk on the road? Neighbour washed it all away.

999 replies

TakesTheCake · 28/03/2021 19:10

We have lived on a small square for four years, where the neighbours are pretty unfriendly and insular (unlike our old street, where they were all lovely and welcoming and mutual support abounded :-( ), and two doors away lives a couple who have always been reasonably friendly and cordial.

Today my two boys aged 7 and 12 were outside playing for a few hours on the square with the boy from next door - riding scooters, running, swinging on the swing in the little grassed area, with me and the boy’s dad keeping watch. My elder boy ran in to get the chalks they sometimes use to draw on our driveway but this time they all drew on the road (there is no pavement, just driveways and road). It covered outside our house and also the neighbours’ house (the couple we are somewhat friendly with). They were really proud of their creativity, finished up, then came in for lunch. Five minutes later the neighbour came out of her house, ran the hose on her driveway and worked pretty hard at scrubbing/washing it all away.

The kids were dismayed when they saw her doing it, and thought they had done something wrong. It felt really horrible for me too, as I don’t think kids’ chalk drawings are out of order in any way, and will wash away in the next rain. They have never caused any issues in the road, so it can’t be because of built-up resentments that spilled over, and they have literally never drawn on the road in the whole four years we have lived there.

She saw me see her doing it, and it feels really awkward now. I would rather she had come over and just straightforwardly said it bothers her to see it from her window and could I make sure it isn’t outside her house again. Washing it away felt passive aggressive, or she really feels I let them do something out of order and wrong.

AIBU to have let them? Are children’s chalk drawings on the road (NOT her driveway or even close) not OK?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
RootyT00t · 28/03/2021 20:54

@MmeLaraque

"Today my two boys aged 7 and 12 were outside playing for a few hours on the square with the boy from next door - riding scooters, running, swinging on the swing in the little grassed area, with me and the boy’s dad keeping watch. My elder boy ran in to get the chalks they sometimes use to draw on our driveway but this time they all drew on the road (there is no pavement, just driveways and road). It covered outside our house and also the neighbours’ house (the couple we are somewhat friendly with). They were really proud of their creativity, finished up, then came in for lunch. Five minutes later the neighbour came out of her house, ran the hose on her driveway and worked pretty hard at scrubbing/washing it all away."

So neighbour cleaned her own driveway, and you're complaining?

No, Mme.
VainAbigail · 28/03/2021 20:54

Fun boundary

😂

Stovetopespresso · 28/03/2021 20:54

sorry defaced not defecated

LST · 28/03/2021 20:54

@MmeLaraque

"Today my two boys aged 7 and 12 were outside playing for a few hours on the square with the boy from next door - riding scooters, running, swinging on the swing in the little grassed area, with me and the boy’s dad keeping watch. My elder boy ran in to get the chalks they sometimes use to draw on our driveway but this time they all drew on the road (there is no pavement, just driveways and road). It covered outside our house and also the neighbours’ house (the couple we are somewhat friendly with). They were really proud of their creativity, finished up, then came in for lunch. Five minutes later the neighbour came out of her house, ran the hose on her driveway and worked pretty hard at scrubbing/washing it all away."

So neighbour cleaned her own driveway, and you're complaining?

How would she have scrubbed the chalking off if she was cleaning her driveway and they hadn't drawn on the drive?
purplecorkheart · 28/03/2021 20:54

Is your neighbour an anxious person? There has been media coverage here about chalk markings outside houses here and burglaries. Maybe she irrationally thought that passing criminals would think her house was marked. Probably just easier to explain to the kids that they should limit their chalk drawings to your own property.

lockdownalli · 28/03/2021 20:55

It makes me smile when I see kids have done chalk drawings on the pavement (unless they are pictures of knobs) as it reminds me of my own childhood.

She is a miserable old cow.

RootyT00t · 28/03/2021 20:56

I live in a flat. The kid from across the way draws on my path. When I go to work in the morning I have to walk across a path with butterflies drawn on it. It really upsets me as I prefer to look at the natural path and pay it loads of attention . WWYD?

malaboi · 28/03/2021 20:56

I clearly must be missing something because I can't see any decent reasons being given why chalk on the (public) road = bad

Same, BT were at it the other day on my road.

malaboi · 28/03/2021 20:56

@RootyT00t social services?

TempsPerdu · 28/03/2021 20:57

Your neighbour needs to get over herself frankly. It’s chalk. Haven’t RTFT so maybe I’m missing something, but I can’t believe there are nine pages of debate about this!

RootyT00t · 28/03/2021 20:57

@purplecorkheart

Is your neighbour an anxious person? There has been media coverage here about chalk markings outside houses here and burglaries. Maybe she irrationally thought that passing criminals would think her house was marked. Probably just easier to explain to the kids that they should limit their chalk drawings to your own property.
Yes , gangs are well known for deploying small children to draw rainbows on people's driveways. They usually choose children the neighbour knows.

There's a good point.

RootyT00t · 28/03/2021 20:57

@TempsPerdu

Your neighbour needs to get over herself frankly. It’s chalk. Haven’t RTFT so maybe I’m missing something, but I can’t believe there are nine pages of debate about this!
Rtft. You will thank me.
malaboi · 28/03/2021 20:57

Some people don’t like children playing out in front of the houses

Or just some people don't like children, some people don't like anything remotely fun or happy.

Kettledodger · 28/03/2021 20:58

@MmeLaraque you failed to read the OP correctly the pertinent bit is this time they all drew on the road ....go ahead read it again

RootyT00t · 28/03/2021 20:58

[quote malaboi]@RootyT00t social services? [/quote]
I think so.

Maybe il soak her with the hose and use her long hair to wipe it off my path. That will teach her .

Although I think my hose is faulty as according to MN hoses only work on your own driveway

MondeoFan · 28/03/2021 20:58

I can't believe the people on this thread saying your kids are in the wrong.
How about letting kids be kids?

This is nothing btw op, one of my sort of neighbours came out of her house and started shouting at me as my dog pooped on the pavement outside her house. Not on her drive or garden on the actual pavement. Said I should pull him into the road to do a poo. It's a really busy road how can I do that? She said it's because she puts her rubbish sacks on that part of the pavement.

RootyT00t · 28/03/2021 20:59

Don't let her visit Glasgow.

People do paintings on the side of buildings.

😭

Original poster
TakesTheCake · 28/03/2021 21:01

Lawks-amercy, this all took a turn! Am chortling away at the responses and also disturbed by how many people are ticking me off for having let them chalk on her driveway when I took pains to avoid that exact confusion.

So yes, they only did the road, y’know, where the cars go. But it’s pretty safe as we are tucked away. I mentioned the hose as on her driveway to be fair to her, else it would look like she dragged a hose through her house to wash away the chalk, when it is fixed under the kitchen window so they can wash their car easily. As in, she isn’t THAT bad of a cowbag to go to so much trouble.

It was so good to see my 12yo out playing with his little brother as he is too cool for school these days and it hasn’t happened for ages.

Yes I saw the artwork and no there were no cock and balls or farting arses. It was mainly Tom-Gates-style monsters, self-portraits and randomly a bird “with a big bum” but tbh it looked like just a fat bird.

I am surprised anyone thinks drawings on the road are out of order, but I asked for opinions so I take that on board. In 12 years they’ve never chalked anywhere but our own drive but I confess when I saw they’d moved onto the road, I never dreamed it would bother anybody. They don’t play out much so I was pleased they were having so much fun with NN’s boy.

The reason I was upset to see it was because they were so happy and then made to feel they’d done wrong, rather than i’m precious about their drawings. Also I now wonder what other innocuous things we do that she’s quietly seething about. I tend to overthink things though.

Just amazed anyone would create bad feeling over temporary kids’ chalk drawings. Amused at the comments here though. Really cheered me up. I did indeed specifically instruct them to crap all over her driveway, disembowel her cat, then shove their chalks up her arse. That’s not unreasonable, though, right?!

OP posts:
Chloemol · 28/03/2021 21:01

YABU. Whilst it will wash away not everyone wants chalk drawings outside their house. Limit the likes to doing it outside yours, on your drive etc

Koolandorthegang · 28/03/2021 21:02

My next door neighbour’s DD used to chalk all over the public road in our cul de sac when she was a kid.

I loved it. She used to draw cities with houses and people etc. It was lovely to see her playing and using her imagination. I bought her some chalk. Honestly, people are so uptight sometimes. It washes away in the rain. There are far worse things in the world than children drawing on a public road with chalk. Leave your neighbour to it OP.

notalwaysalondoner · 28/03/2021 21:02

As someone who doesn’t have kids, yes actually, it would bother me to have colourful scribbles all over my road, even if it’s the public highway. Yes, I agree she should have told you face to face and hosing it away is pretty passive aggressive, but just because you think chalking is fun and nice for the kids, doesn’t mean everyone looks at it the same way. I hate it when I see it here in London on the Thames path paving near our flat, and it doesn’t take one rain to wash away, I’ve seen the concierge of our building having to scrub it, so I guess it depends on the surface. And either way, it looks messy and graffiti like to me, even if it’s done by cute children having fun.

3AndStopping · 28/03/2021 21:02

Our neighbour opposite hasn’t spoken to us since our kids chalked on the pavement last summer. Who even has the energy to give a shit. Honestly I think you have to be pretty miserable to get up tight about something that is such a non issue!

Really passive aggressive to come out as soon as
You went in too. YANBU.

3AndStopping · 28/03/2021 21:03

@notalwaysalondoner 🤣🤣🤣

RootyT00t · 28/03/2021 21:03

@TakesTheCake

Lawks-amercy, this all took a turn! Am chortling away at the responses and also disturbed by how many people are ticking me off for having let them chalk on her driveway when I took pains to avoid that exact confusion.

So yes, they only did the road, y’know, where the cars go. But it’s pretty safe as we are tucked away. I mentioned the hose as on her driveway to be fair to her, else it would look like she dragged a hose through her house to wash away the chalk, when it is fixed under the kitchen window so they can wash their car easily. As in, she isn’t THAT bad of a cowbag to go to so much trouble.

It was so good to see my 12yo out playing with his little brother as he is too cool for school these days and it hasn’t happened for ages.

Yes I saw the artwork and no there were no cock and balls or farting arses. It was mainly Tom-Gates-style monsters, self-portraits and randomly a bird “with a big bum” but tbh it looked like just a fat bird.

I am surprised anyone thinks drawings on the road are out of order, but I asked for opinions so I take that on board. In 12 years they’ve never chalked anywhere but our own drive but I confess when I saw they’d moved onto the road, I never dreamed it would bother anybody. They don’t play out much so I was pleased they were having so much fun with NN’s boy.

The reason I was upset to see it was because they were so happy and then made to feel they’d done wrong, rather than i’m precious about their drawings. Also I now wonder what other innocuous things we do that she’s quietly seething about. I tend to overthink things though.

Just amazed anyone would create bad feeling over temporary kids’ chalk drawings. Amused at the comments here though. Really cheered me up. I did indeed specifically instruct them to crap all over her driveway, disembowel her cat, then shove their chalks up her arse. That’s not unreasonable, though, right?!

You don't let them speak in public do you?

She hasn't got a cat. She's got a Newfoundland called Bos who is chalk pink. Keep up OP.

Colouringaddict · 28/03/2021 21:03

@Babdoc

Kids have chalked on roads and pavements for generations. We used to chalk out hopscotch squares back in the 1950’s and 60’s, and nobody complained. It’s rather sad that your neighbour apparently objects to a harmless activity. There are plenty of worse things your DC could have been doing out there! Maybe suggest to your DC that they chalk anywhere except directly outside the house of the grumpy neighbour.
We lived in a road that had a massive square area at the bottom that was slabbed and had pink slabs all over to map out hopscotch. We all played there often, a lot of us were in the same age bracket, I think at one point we had 20 of us playing. One particular day we had all been playing hopscotch etc and we went in for lunch. Our doorbell rang and it was a woman who lived beside the square, house and garden totally separate to it, with a bucket of soapy water and a broom, insisting I went and scrubbed it off. She singled me out of this big crowd which included her daughter!

My mum was quite forceful in her refusal, but I never chalked there or played with anyone that had again. I am in my 50’s now and it’s stuck with me