Another thread has made me realise there are so many threads/posts about Christmas stresses and angst, and the same things seem to pop up every year. Every single year! I think we need cards and a competition to see who wins Full House first...
DH went out for his works Christmas party and has not come home yet and it's 7am - where is he?
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Do we have a MN Christmas threads full house yet?
307 replies
CloseEncountersOfTheTerfKind · 20/12/2019 10:33
OP posts:
CloseEncountersOfTheTerfKind ·
20/12/2019 11:52
Oooh I genuinely have one of my own!
My drug dealing neighbour whose dogs are huge barky shits and the police are always parking outside my house to visit him, has sent me a card saying "love from all at No. 14" AIBU to think he is taking the piss and want to confront (a favoured MN phrase) him?
(I made up the number 14, it's actually different in RL 
)
OP posts:
PortiaCastis ·
20/12/2019 12:01
Not the wrong trousers but the wrong plates.
AIBU to be upset! My MIL invited me dh and 5dc for Christmas, cooked all our meals I didn't need to help but she used the wrong plates
RED CHRISTMAS PLATES I ask you how could anyone be so underclass as to use those plates!!!
I'm so angry that dhs family are so common and AIBU to be going NC after I see what they've bought dc4 for her Birthday
WhereverIMayRoam ·
20/12/2019 12:03
Penis Portions! Mil (it’s always Mil) plated up and gave dh half a turkey, ten roasties, 12 pigs in blanket and a partridge in a pear tree but only gave me two small roasties, a thin slice of turkey and half a carrot.
80% of posters will wax lyrical about the huge plates of food they had or supplied to their guests.
10% will insist OP is grabby and ungrateful and should consider herself honoured to be allowed inside Mils house even if she was serving beans on toast for Christmas dinner.
This year I expect approx 9.9% to shudder and make 
faces as they despair for the environment at such indulgence...
The final .1% is that muppet who comes on to say by my calculations that’s approximately 600 calories, I think that’s perfectly adequate and any more would be sheer gluttony, I can’t imagine how you could eat more 
!!
CloseEncountersOfTheTerfKind ·
20/12/2019 13:19
When I say don't go on Reastie's threads, I mean because it's all too tempting and you'll spend too much money, I just realised my post sounded very rude 
I love those threads.
On that note, if you buy one of their excellent value Yankee Outlet wax burners, don't stupidly pick up the little dish of melted wax when it's really hot, and drop it onto your brand new coffee table and carpet.
OP posts:
flouncyfanny ·
20/12/2019 14:13
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
GingleJangleScarecrow ·
20/12/2019 14:24
Most excellent thread OP May I offer the following:
How do I make the dinner?
What can I prepare in advance?
What can I have for breakfast on Christmas Day?
What would you put out for a buffet?
What do you eat?
What food shall I buy?
I have just typed out - and deleted - a ridiculously grinchy answer to one of the above. No problem with people asking the question although grown adults should know what the fuck they might want to eat Just bloody read some of the squillion other threads asking exactly the same fucking question over and over again.
CloseEncountersOfTheTerfKind ·
20/12/2019 14:30
Well the carpet looks shit 
but it is ancient anyway, it's only the coffee table that was new DH heroically avoided the subject of how he didn't get the deposit back on a rental property back in the 90s because I got drunk and knocked a Halloween candle onto the carpet. I could tell he was tempted to bring it up
OP posts:
theoriginalmadambee ·
20/12/2019 14:41
Sorry to hijack a little op, but you have set me off 
.
What is it with people? You cannot do right judging by the Christmas threads.
Can any of you tell me of one acceptable gift. All I see on the threads you refer to, is too much/many, too little. Taat, hate chocolate, hate this and that. Hate presents, all going to charity shops.
What is the one thing you can always give without offending?
When did people stop being happy someone thought of them?
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pantsville ·
20/12/2019 14:51
The annual “are home made Christmas presents shit?” thread.
Cue everyone who makes home made presents getting fucking livid and insisting all their friends/family/acquaintances spend all year longing for her world famous marmalade. Cue everyone else saying they basically appreciate the thought but may or may not like whatever the gift is.
Smuggy McKnobson always posts a Pinterest-perfect picture of some little homemade cakes or something glistening in candlelight and goes “well here are the gifts I make, not had any complaints so far ” and everyone clambers up the posters arse joking about being their new mate.
As if you’d ever receive a jar of jam someone had made you anyway, open it in front of them, look them in their eager, expectant little face and say, “looks fucking foul sorry”
Camomila ·
20/12/2019 15:03
What is the one thing you can always give without offending?
Pot plant? Nice Panettone in a JL tin?
DH and I have been married 5 years, every year DM gives PIL a nice pot plant and MIL gives my parents a nice panettone
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