Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Mumsnet classics

Relive the funniest, most unforgettable threads. For a daily dose of Mumsnet’s best bits, sign up for Mumsnet's daily newsletter.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Embarrassed by boyfriend

1000 replies

DogDmor · 14/06/2018 13:01

Been seeing someone for around 3 months. We get in we'll but he's quirky, which is fine - well I thought it was. Sometimes I'm starting to think he's just plain odd.

He's overweight and said he wanted to get fitter so I suggested he come along to my karate class. He did and I ended up mortified. He wore scruffy old jogging suit bottoms with paint on them and a massive baggy t-shirt with Harry Potter on. Whenever instructor showed him something he giggled. Instructor is hard arse, old school - I've known him for years and knew he was going to react badly. After 3 or so giggling moments and DB stood in weird positions and flapping his arms around like a little girl instructor said "what are you giggling at? Are you a girl or what? Do you have something wrong with you?". Everyone was looking. DB started stuttering and instructor carried on with "you know this is karate and not ballet don't you? Are you in the wrong class?". DBs face went bright red. I was mortified and just wanted to hide. Another female instructor said "alright, it's his first day" so instructor said "but what's he giggling at?". Anyway later on instructor came over to me and said "where the hell did you find him? Is he one of your patients or something?" I was so embarrassed I just said "he's a neighbour".

After the class I asked DB why he kept laughing. I'd warned him beforehand about the instructor. He replied "it was funny, I thought I looked silly!" So I said "you did, why did you act like that? It's a class full of martial artists, nobody else was acting like that" do he looked embarrassed and said "I don't know" so I said he shouldn't come again as instructor will have it in for him now. He got upset and said "but I like spending time with you" so I snapped and farted and said "well you embarrassed me, I've been going there for years and now I don't want to go back because of you, find your own hobby".

Anyway this isn't an isolated incident, a couple of weeks ago he embarrassed me in a cafe shouting and making a scene. In private we get on really well but in private he mortifies me.

He still wants to come to karate with me tonight. AIBU to tell him I don't want him there?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
17
liz70 · 15/06/2018 13:38

"Why would you even say that you farted?
I need to know."

That's just the problem. The OP thought we needed to know. We didn't.

Racheyg · 15/06/2018 13:40

Omg I'm in fits reading this on the tube. I'm crying and now my make up has run.

DavidBowiesNumber1 · 15/06/2018 13:40

I nominated this for Classics last night as it's the best laugh I've had in a long time Grin
True or not, I don't care, it's given so many of us a bit of fun

DavidBowiesNumber1 · 15/06/2018 13:47

Can someone please post the link to the thread about the talking dog please? I've searched but can't find it and need a laugh again

WakeUpMaggie · 15/06/2018 14:10

OP, you are hilarious. Intended or not. I haven't laughed so much in ages. Grin

SayNoToCarrots · 15/06/2018 14:12

Sorry it was the fly space www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2927932-AIBU-about-the-man-on-the-bus

marmeemarch1 · 15/06/2018 14:25

LeeValley2 Sounds like OP is an expert in martial farts. GrinGrinGrinGrinGrinGrinGrin

DavidBowiesNumber1 · 15/06/2018 14:32

Thanks SnappyFartingPigeon

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 15/06/2018 14:36

LandofOddSocks I hope not! Burnt bum! Shock

teamclean · 15/06/2018 15:10

OMG! I just gave my dog a ticking-off for incessantly barking while I am trying to work. He's only just gone and dropped one and walked out to the stairs to get away from it - little sod Envy (not envy!)

NutButterNutter · 15/06/2018 15:14

Why is 'snapped and farted' so funny? I'm crying and shaking and I'm not even in a good mood Grin

Goldmonday · 15/06/2018 15:17

Woohoo it's on classics!!!

Sortofcool · 15/06/2018 15:25

I’d like some sort of acknowledgement for replying to the question without mentioning the S or the F words.

NutButterNutter · 15/06/2018 15:27

Sortof have a Star and a Cake

Dadstheworld · 15/06/2018 15:44

I like the idea in a room full of adults dressed in PJs pretending to be ninjas, that your DP was the weird one.

Sortofcool · 15/06/2018 15:47

Nutbutter gosh a star AND cake. I’m so happy I could F.

LandOfOddSocks · 15/06/2018 15:56

Maybe that's why they have scales @PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks? Smile

CutesyUserName · 15/06/2018 15:59

I think you'd be better off dating your instructor. You sound like a good match.

amyj1994 · 15/06/2018 16:30

I need to know what the typo was in 'snapped and farted'!

ChristineAndMaryBeth · 15/06/2018 16:34

It wasn’t a typo! Which is why it’s gold

LoveProsecco · 15/06/2018 17:37

Star Well done OP for making it to MN classics! Star

Ooopsijustsnarted · 15/06/2018 17:38

I'm so happy it made it to classics.
🐊💨

Fintress · 15/06/2018 17:53

Oh bloody hell you lot. I am currently sitting on the balcony in a rather quiet boutique hotel in another country and howling with laughter. My husband didn't even need to ask why I'm laughing, he guessed correctly, hope the neighbours don't complain 😂

throwawayagain · 15/06/2018 18:52

The farting destroyed me.
IBS finished me off.
10/10 OP. GrinGrinGrin

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is not accepting new messages.
Swipe left for the next trending thread