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Expats, tell me what aspect or social norm of your new country was strange to you?

993 replies

AjasLipstick · 18/03/2018 06:53

I am a Brit in Oz and for me, the hardest thing to get used to was Sunday trading hours being like the UK in the 70s.

The weirdest thing was how much less formal people are...kids are dressed very informally and parties for children never have kids dressed up in party dresses but in shorts and t shirts. I like it now I'm used to it though.

OP posts:
Devora13 · 20/03/2018 08:53

Ah yes sorry PanPanPanPing picked the wrong name!

Devora13 · 20/03/2018 09:00

Chicken owner
You were being 'sensitive' I think actually that was a polite way of putting it.
I'd have said rude and potentially xenophobic.

80sMum · 20/03/2018 09:00

@GnomeDePlume your description of the Dutch children's party sounds just like how children's parties used to be here in the UK in the past, except for the bit about delivering the children back to their parents.

I too find it strange that children no longer open their presents immediately upon receipt but the parents instead just take them and put them on a table or out of sight somewhere. I suspect that the reason for that is so that the birthday child doesn't have the opportunity to open the packaging and actually play with the contents until the parents have vetted it, with a view to re-gifting it at someone else's party if their own child already has the item or if the parents disapprove of it!

chicazteca · 20/03/2018 09:01

Mexican in the UK. When we get introduced to a new person in Mexico, it's okay to greet each other with a kiss on the cheek, rather than just a handshake. I dare you to try that in the UK! Looking back, it was comical to see my freshly introduced acquaintances shaking my hand saying "Pleased to meet you!" and their eyes opening wider and wider as I got closer to them to the realisation that I was going to kiss their cheek - especially if they were males! Grin

Devora13 · 20/03/2018 09:08

Iljkk
I ask anyway. I do get some looks at times like I've insulted their children or something, but queuing for ten minutes just to find they don't sell what I want is just madness.

Devora13 · 20/03/2018 09:12

80s Mum
I take a bit more of a sympathetic view to the non present opening. I recall starting to open gifts at my 21st, only to realise I'd spent the best part of an hour doing this rather than chatting, dancing and having fun with friends and family. I expect parents just want the children to socialise and enjoy the occasion.

RiverTamFan · 20/03/2018 09:18

Just moving from Northern Ireland to northern England involved the difficulties of what to call a bread roll in a bakery (no longer baps, they were now barms) to say nothing of as we moved what elasticated pe shoes are: pumps, plimsolls, gutties etc etc
Kids in Northern Ireland played on the quieter streets as soon as they were upright and then walk in a pack that the parents all watch. Plus people in England having to be warned after 9/11 not to touch abandoned bags at train stations: DH & I just looked at each other, "Why on Earth would you want to do that?:

StickStickStickStick · 20/03/2018 09:19

Yep that's it exactly - they're supposed to make guests feel welcome, focus on playing with friends and avoids any competitive "whose gift did you like best/hers was more expensive than mine etc.

Devora13 · 20/03/2018 09:22

expatinspain
I don't know where you live but 'the lack of family time'? Seriously? Whole families from babies up to elderly relatives go out for meals, to events together etc. Everyone is involved in keeping an eye on the little ones so that parents get a chance to breath. In the summer, during siesta time, families often pack up and go down to the beach together for a couple of hours. And 'no children' events are generally seen as weird.

cambodianfoxhound · 20/03/2018 09:22

Another one for China, when accidents etc. are reported in the local news papers and online, they use extremely graphic photographs of the victims. You literally see unedited photographs of dead bodies, people with horrendous injuries on stretchers (faces shown). Nobody bats an eyelid at this at all.

LardLizard · 20/03/2018 09:25

Interesting

mundoespanol · 20/03/2018 09:40

In Spain (where most people live in flats and a lot have daily cleaners) people seem to shake their rugs out of their windows everyday, clean the windows once a week, have their clothes and hair immaculate, wear plastic gloves to select fruit and veg in the supermarket and don’t let their kids get dirty when playing, but then go to the bar and throw paper serviettes on the floor when finished eating their tapas and throw cigarette butts on the ground and NEVER wash their hands after using the toilet! Lived there for 6 years and the only people I saw wash their hands were foreign.Confused

mundoespanol · 20/03/2018 09:42

Cambodianfoxhound - in Spain too. Especially car crashes but I think that is to shock people as they drive like lunatics out there.

StickStickStickStick · 20/03/2018 09:44

If they don't wash hands surely there's a higher incidence of sick bugs etc.... Or is it really not necessary!?!?

Hakarl · 20/03/2018 09:48

@PanPanPanPing - No, that is not an Icelandic thing. Icelandic culture is quite similar to other Northern European cultures in that people are typically quite reserved. I suppose those were weird Icelanders! Or perhaps they were just excited to be in 'the outlands'.

PanPanPanPing · 20/03/2018 09:57

Thanks, Hakarl. That's interesting, although I did get the impression that they were enjoying the novelty of being in 'the outlands'! Perhaps they were testing us to see how reserved/unfriendly Londoners could be?! Or, one of the friends with me said he thought he'd recognised them from coming into the pub about a year ago - so perhaps they recognised us and thought it would be nice to say hello/goodbye?!!

mundoespanol · 20/03/2018 10:01

Stick - doesnt seem to be. Just a bit disgusting. I guess that’s why they wear gloves in the fruit aisle - never thought about that until now!

Ohmmmnm · 20/03/2018 10:03

Brit in Greece.

Greeks have a totally different queueing system. Rather than everyone waiting in an orderly line, locals, old people, disabled and those with young children will be sent straight to the front. When I first arrived I was horrified at all the pushing in, but now much prefer this to the British system of 'first come first served' even if a person at the back is struggling.

People are far more likely to deal with emergencies themselves than wait for the proper authorities. When a fire happened in a building on my street, the locals found ladders, hoses and buckets and had rescued the occupants and put the fire out before the fire engine arrived. After a bad car crash where leaking oil turned the road into a slip and slide, a local sent a bunch of kids to go and bring handfuls of dirt to spread over the road.

Processed food is eye wateringly expensive, but fresh, organic produce from the local market costs pennies.

Old people are respected and can walk down the street any time of night without fear.

Gangs of teenagers are not intimidating.

No class system, you often see politicians eating in local tavernas, talking with their mouth full and calling everyone 'malaka'.

Attempting to get any kind of formal document such as a passport or id card involves a wild goose chase around several different offices and possible even across country if you lived in a different town at some point.

People can be extremely poor even though they own their own house, land and several shops.

ThisIsTheFirstStep · 20/03/2018 10:04

mundo same in Korea. An absolute obsession with things being 'jjijji' (dirty) - putting your handbag on the floor is jjijji, letting your kids touch the ground is jjijji, my mother in law doesn't even let my dog sniff around because that's jjijji too - but God forbid anyone should wash their hands before eating or after peeing.

Everyone looks immaculate at all times here too, and yet I know their hands are swarming with germs.

I don't want to sound racist but it really grosses me out. Women at work come out of the bathroom and directly start chatting to you and fixing their make up and they aren't even slightly ashamed about not having washed their hands. I think there's just a massive lack of education in this area.

mundoespanol · 20/03/2018 10:10

CakeRattleandRoll YES! Is it queso fresco? I remember that, I like it.

soulrider · 20/03/2018 10:11

Plus people in England having to be warned after 9/11 not to touch abandoned bags at train stations: DH & I just looked at each other, "Why on Earth would you want to do that?:

There's always been warnings, pre-dates 9/11 by a long way! If anything things are slightly more relaxed now, there are rubbish bins at railway stations which is something there never was growing up because of the IRA

SundayGirls · 20/03/2018 10:14

80sMum - the present opening later is so the parent knows which present came from which person for the thank-you cards afterwards.
We make a list as they are being opened.

Also if presents are opened at the time, other children naturally want to play with them too and this can lead to squabbles.
Also the birthday guests should be enjoying the party, not watching birthday child get all the presents.
It’s all about manners, quite the opposite to what you’re thinking about regifting etc.

MereDintofPandiculation · 20/03/2018 10:15

In Oz when we get fuel and there’s someone behind us waiting we move our car and park it to let the person behind refuel rather than sit there and wait for for us to pay and leave! When I asked my husband why they don’t do this here he said people will assume you’re going to drive off and not pay! I thought it was because the cashier only knows how much you owe while the figure is still showing on the pump. So until you've paid, no-one else can use that pump, so you might as well stay parked by it.

Quantumblue · 20/03/2018 10:18

I didn't let my small DC open birthday presents at their parties because it kind of grinds the party to a halt while that is happening, they could get overwhelmed by the presents and start playing with them instead of interacting with the guests, they didn't have the skills to manage smoothly if given duplicates and some guests might dive in amongst the presents and we would lose all hope of keeping track of who gave what.

Pocketangel · 20/03/2018 10:22

Brit in the UAE

Flashing your headlights at someone here does not mean a) go on, you go first or b) Did you know you’ve forgotten to put your headlights on? It means GET OUT OF MY WAY OR I’LL RAM YOU WITH MY MASSIVE CAR! Very aggressive driving style...

Many shops don’t open until 3pm on a Friday (holy day) but can be open from 8am until midnight every other day of the week.

The ‘night culture’ of most things being open late. I phoned to get a doctor’s appointment for my 2 year old and was given one at 10.40pm that night! 😳

The expectation of things that are done for you - bag packing at the supermarket I get, but then wheeling the trolley to your car, unloading it into your boot and taking the trolley back? A waiter brings a can of coke in a cafe or restaurant, opens it and pours it for you as well as conveniently ripping half the wrapper off the straw for you. There is a lady in most public toilets who will get paper towels from the dispenser for you.

EVERYTHING gets delivered. You can phone your corner shop for a can of coke and a packet of cigarettes and someone will deliver them to your door.

Loose camels on the motorway.

A man sitting next to you on the plane with a falcon on his arm.

Families with maids, drivers, cooks and a nanny per child. Often when the mother doesn’t go out to work and the children are all at school. (Bit jealous about this tbh...)