Expats, tell me what aspect or social norm of your new country was strange to you?

[AjasLipstick]

I am a Brit in Oz and for me, the hardest thing to get used to was Sunday trading hours being like the UK in the 70s.

The weirdest thing was how much less formal people are...kids are dressed very informally and parties for children never have kids dressed up in party dresses but in shorts and t shirts. I like it now I'm used to it though.

@Todamhottoday why ARE you there?

You see a lot of small statues of Mary and/or bird baths featuring St Francis in front and back yards in the US. (They are not Mary gardens).

I lived in an Italian-american town for a while and there were statues/bird baths of Mary or Joseph or Francis everywhere (still are). Never saw that in Ireland - lots of town grottoes and lots of abandoned Infant de Pragues put out for a wedding and forgotten about but not those statues. The thing is they still persist - I think if you buy a house with one, most people are a bit superstitious about chucking it out so kind of leave it to the elements.

A couple more.

Re. Swearing. Fuck off is common parlance, even for kids as the first language isn't English so no-one even raises an eyebrow (except me). It's the equivalent of get lost

On the subject of swearing all major swear words are Catholic religious words : Christ, tabernacle, wafer, chalis _ I've translated from French to English but these would be on par with fuck and cunt

Had two kids over here, EMCS with DS then once pregnant with DD I was asked by the obgyn what I wanted. I told him another section please, he didn't even bother with a spiel about trying for a VBAC he just said fine. Second to none obstetric care.

oh yes swearing.

In US pissed means offended/angry. In ireland it meant drunk. That one was confusing for a while.

Folk being ultra direct. asking how much you earn, why are you fat etc.

Folk walking really slow and queuing for ages for a freebie.

Folk laughing/giggling inappropriately when nervous.

Folk following and taking pictures if my kids, just walking up and picking them up or letting them out their buggy.

Folk not strapping their kids into seatbelts or child car seats.

Blurring out anything considered sexual but no issue showing extreme violence on tv/movies.

Ah - good times!

another one for Oz:

Not being able to buy alcohol in the supermarket, but from the (linked) shop next door or from drive through bottle shop. One radical supermarket (one not the chain) is trialling a aisle of alcohol but you have to enter the hallowed portals via a gate.

And speeding tickets- you don't declare them on insurance as everyone has them. You get a huge fine and one point for 2 kms over the limit even where it is 100km/h.

Private school is very common here- probably at high school the split is 50/50. God knows how so many afford it.

And tinned asparagus wrapped in white bread with the crusts cut off.

Asparagus rolls! Love 'em.

My first visit back to NZ after 20 years was just before Christmas and my SIL was making up a plate to take to a party. Out came the loaf of sliced white, buuter and tins of asparagus.

Ooh, I said, is it a retro party?

It wasn't.

@AjasLipstick what do you mean by Sunday Trading hours? I'm in NSW and on a Sunday shops are open until 10pm which I found utterly bizarre to start with but I don't think that was how things were in the UK in the 70s?

wobbles are you in Korea? Sounds familiar.

@Slapdasherie why haven't I seen or even heard of these asparagus rolls? I've been here nearly 3 years and not a mention of them! I'm clearly not moving in the right circles! Although they do sound erm.... peculiar. I've had to feign delight at offerings of kiwi dip at drinks events enough so mothers pride wrapped tinned asparagus might tip me over the edge!

A Cypriot in London:
The obsession with social class! A senior professor talking about being "working class". Seriously?!
Lovely libraries with gorgeous new books
Avoiding eye contact in the street and on tube
The general distaste for Catholics

I was actually talking about this with my Finnish colleague last night. She's only been in the UAE for about a year, and I've been here 12 years (well, 5 in Qatar, 7 in the UAE). We both work in the Energy field, which outside of the Gulf region is an incredibly male dominated field (especially out niche branch), particularly old, white male dominated. However, in the Gulf, the STEM industry & energy in particular, is female dominated.

Most of my co-workers, and my boss, are local females, the entire organization is geared towards females, with flex hours, no issues with half a day on mothers day, gifts for international women's day & mothers day, a crèche in the building, etc.

And YOUNG! I can't get over how young everyone is compared to Canada. Top jobs are traditionally held by people in their mid-40's and younger, whereas in Canada you'd be lucky to find management level below the age of 55. In fact, my 65 year old father had an easier time finding a job in Canada than my 35 year old brother did. There's no Baby Boomer preference here.

Also, the level of education is very high. Most of my co-workers have Masters and many are working on PhD's.

It's a very family oriented, female oriented culture, which is the EXACT OPPOSITE of what you think the Middle East would be like.

echt:When used in a crowd situation, " Excuse me, please," I always think has overtones of passive aggression, leading shortly to all-out aggression, because it's usually said when you feel you're not making any headway and have had it, and will shortly start just pushing.

But, then, I grew up in Sydney, so my experience may not be typical.

Private school is very common here- probably at high school the split is 50/50. God knows how so many afford it.

Catholic schools in particular are very heavily subsidised, but all private schools get per-pupil state funding, so they’re much cheaper.

My counterpoint to the high number of private schools in Australia is faith schools in the state sector in the UK. The idea you might not be able to go to your local state primary because you’re not the right religion.

@AjasLipstick
WomanFormerly Really? I have to say that for me it's been the opposite! Since moving to Australia, I've met so many amazing and open women...who genuinely want to get to know me or help me in some way.

I live in SA...where do you live?

In NSW, north of Newy in Port Stephens - used to be in Sydney. I find people very insular where I am (people tell me the culture is still country town though population pretty big and popular holiday destination).

Where in SA does you live - city or rural??

@Hakarl - or anyone in Iceland!

Is it commonplace for Icelanders to say hello and goodbye to random strangers? I ask because recently, having lunch with a few friends in a London pub (and we were the only customers in the pub at that point), two guys came in and and said a cheery hello directly to us. We said hello back and when they went to the bar to order their drinks we heard, during their conversation with the barman, that they were Icelandic. They had their drinks and a snack and when they left, they said a cheery goodbye to us, which, of course, we returned. It was all rather jolly, but obviously not really the norm in the UK

NotSureThisIsWhatIWant I would use 'disculpe' in the situation you describe. Having spent a lot of time in Spain, I confess that I much prefer the openness of greeting and general warmness of character. I recall coming back to the UK after a while away and feeling when out and about in a shopping area that I was in a scene from The Walking Dead!

Hakarl this level of friendly greeting happens in a lot of countries and isn't peculiar to Iceland.
I remember being part of an ex pat group when in Spain, consisting mainly of Brits but with three or four Dutch members. After the activity, the Brits would sit down for a drink together and the Dutch would stand isolated at the bar. I remember the shock and discomfort on the faces of the Brits when I went over over invited the Dutch to join us. In general, I find the Brits strange rather than vice versa, although I do acknowledge the friendliness of Brits very much varies by area.
Sweet warm muffin with ham and cheese??? Surely this is a mistake, and what is on offer here is a breakfast muffin (type of bread).
Whoever it was that jumped in with 'they maybe don't speak to you in the street because they don't like you' I think speaks volumes about the person who made that comment.

devora I hate that some British people are that unfriendly. I am a super socially awkward and introverted person bt I can’t stand leaving people out so I am always the one who feels they have to ask people to join us etc.

I think Brits are some of the most awkard people ever.

The Cagador. When I first went to Southern Spain I thought this was one of my OHs wind ups. At Christmas, many homes, churches and public buildings have a nativity scene on display (Belen) which features a Cagador. This is a hidden figure, such as a shepherd, taking a dump.
When I was reporting for a local newspaper, I went to one local town hall where the culture official proudly showed me their Belen, on public display. 'Look,' he said, helping me to zoom in to the right places on the large display 'This year we have not one, but two Cagadores!' :D

I'm German and I have never heard the term Tagesheime used for children. Is that a Northern thing?

Devora, I'm not sure whether you were answering me (a couple of posts up) or something that Hakarl said earlier! If your answer was to me, this was in my local pub, in London, where a number of customers are from other countries and never a hello or goodbye is exchanged if we're all strangers to each other; we were just a bit surprised - and charmed - by the friendly hello/goodbyes from the Icelanders, it was rather nice!

It was the posts from some of the MNers living in Germany who have said it's customary to greet everyone in, say, the doctor's waiting room etc that reminded me of the cheery Icelanders!

DullAndOld I think the idea is that you get a fresh flannel for each guest. Changed daily :D :D :D

Oh another one from Korea - people have a family book with generational names written down. So everyone from each generation often (if the parents always follow it) have one part of the name the same.

For example, say the generational name is ‘Seok’. Your name is Kim Hyeong Seok. Your brother might be Kim In Seok. Your cousins might be Kim Won Seok and Kim Jae Seok. Your father’s generational name is Yeonz He could be Kim Yeon Hyeong. His brother could be Kim Yeon Pyo. Their cousins might be Kim Yeon Hui and Kin Yeon Ha.

So if my husband meets someone whose surname and generational name is the same as his, he knows they’re probably distant cousins.

I find this super interesting. Our son has the generational name for our family.

*should be Yeon not Yeonz there