Expats, tell me what aspect or social norm of your new country was strange to you?

[AjasLipstick]

I am a Brit in Oz and for me, the hardest thing to get used to was Sunday trading hours being like the UK in the 70s.

The weirdest thing was how much less formal people are...kids are dressed very informally and parties for children never have kids dressed up in party dresses but in shorts and t shirts. I like it now I'm used to it though.

Brit in the USA (I don't know if this has been said before - I haven't read 15 pages), but the effusive greetings used to get me every time to start with e.g.:

Total stranger: Hi! How ARE you?
Me: Er ... I'm well thank you. How are you?
Stranger: [blank look] How can I help you today?
Me: Er ... I'm just browsing thanks ... [scuttles off]

And in restaurants:
Server: What can I get you to drink?
Me: Some water please
Server: Sorry?
Me: Some water please
Server: [now looking desperate] Sorry I didn't get that
Me: A glass of warder please
Server: Oh! Okay.

I consider myself an immigrant.
I don't really understand what an ex-pat is. Ex-pat seems to imply a community of similar nationality people which I don't have.

First example:
3rd day of school in new (Asian) country. My 6 year old daughter comes home with her class reading book. I flip through and there is a picture of a child lying face down on the floor in front of the teacher at the front of the class.
Me: Whats this child doing?
DD: Oh, she's saying sorry to the teacher. He's angry because she's late.
Me: Is that what the children at school have to do if they are late?
DD: Yes they have to lie on the floor to apologise properly to the teacher.
Me: (Brief pause....)
OK we are guests in this country and we have to be adaptable/ sensitive to new experiences blah blah blah and we will embrace the new school/ /culture/ country way of doing things, even though Im uncomfortable with it...but....... thats as far as apologising goes. Ever. Anything else, tell them to talk to me...
Being fair, we had a great 4 years there!
2nd Example:
When we moved from Asia back to Europe and we realised that our blond haired 3 year old thought it was fine to clamber up into anyones arms in the park to be cuddled and petted and have his hair stroked like he was used to in Asia. Resulted in a slightly freaked elderly German gentleman!

FiveHours - I'm fascinated by the idea that someone could see stripy lawns as something new/commentable! having grown up with them they seem perfectly normal, but looking at it through the eyes of an adult who didn't grow up with them, it must seem a bit strange!

I have been known to chequerboard my lawn

Mayonnaise on chips in the UK. I thought people were kidding until I saw it and tasted it...and its actually quite nice.

@losmn fair enough - I'll be more specific in the future. I am in the southern bit.

Mayonnaise on chips in the UK? I'm a Brit and the only time I've eaten mayonnaise on chips was in Holland!

Londoner in Israel:
Even though everyone thinks Israel is a war zone I love the safety here - my 16year old daughter walks around with girl friends at midnight and isn't harassed. I can go jogging on my own at 10pm and not be afraid. My 6 year old spends all day Saturday hanging out with different friends and I have no idea where she is, she'll come home when it gets dark.
There is more Middle East pushing and touching and less personal space than in the UK. There is a lot more talking to strangers in the supermarket and on public transport, and unwanted advice that your baby is overdressed, under-dressed, should be walking, potty-trained, should be carried etc by well-meaning strangers. Big family get-togethers at every possible occasion.

This is a great thread.
I'm South African, living in UK now but have worked/ travelled in a few places particularly as most of my family have married foreigners and moved so we tend to have family all over the world.

The British queuing is the one that gets me the most. Crowded bus stop in rush hour... but everyone queues in a straight line even though a more fluid system would take less space and be quicker to get on bus. I find it incomprehensible.

Children starting school so young. And being expected to meet pretty high milestones very early. My parents still don't understand our worries about DS' reading because in their minds he should barely have started to learn to read!

Greeks asking you how much you earn. Practically the first question.

French kissing. I still haven't adjusted to that one. I worked for a french company and found the kissing of everyone, including my boss, on a regular basis odd. She didn't work in our office so we only saw her every few weeks but we had to do the double kiss every time. Completely threw me. And when I finally cracked it, I left and went to work for an English firm and got myself in trouble by accidentally stepping up for a kiss on one memorable, and embarrassing, occasion!

In lots of Europe I see children being far more independent very young. I have nephews and nieces who go to school alone from the age of about 5. I think we're too strict here, but 5 seems crazy to me.

Yes Britain does seem weirdly over protective of children to most foreigners.
What gets me are the comments on MN sometimes insisting that children at a certain age simply can not do x, when they seem totally unaware that children of that age routinely do X in other countries.

Another Australian one: saying "excuse me", rather than "excuse me please". It still sounds like an instruction to me, and bloody rude, though I know that's not how it's intended.

Mayonnaise on chips in the UK? I'm a Brit and the only time I've eaten mayonnaise on chips was in Holland!

And Belgium.
Or in London in Belgo.

The shocking predominance of diary products in the British menu

People eat mayonnaise with chips here in France. Our stagiaire does, anyway!

Malta:
driving is crazy; aim seems to be to get as close as possible to the bumper of the car in front. Road signs are five feet before the turning. People accelerate towards roundabouts. Drivers honk their horns when going fast round a blind bend as if that will save a life. I know it’s a Mediterranean thing but a cheese-stuffed Wudy? Boak!
Fireworks in the day and night time for a week before the village religious festival (festa). The point seems to be to make as loud a bang as possible as the daytime ones aren’t really visible. Weekend nights in the summer sound like the artillery barrage before the first day of the Somme. Village festa decorations constructed by groups of blokes who nail home made fireworks to rickety structures without taking the lit fags out their mouths. Every summer there’s at least one massive explosion in a firework ‘factory’ e.g. Guze’s shed. The hunters who blast every tiny bird out the sky. Construction work starts at 7am. Demolishing beautiful old houses to put up loads of concrete shoeboxes. Groups of blokes sitting in village square shouting at each other - you realise they’re just chatting about the family or something. No sense of appropriate volume.
But I still love it there. Most people are lovely, have a great sense of humour. Pastizzi for 35cents for lunch. Amazing local food produce. Walk into the summer sea without flinching because it’s cold.

American in England. I know some I have mentioned have been said before and I haven’t read through the entire thread

1. Are you all right vs How are you?

Made me paranoid, thinking I looked ill or sad

1. Not rinsing dishes

Annoys me to no end. How do you know if the dishes are completely clean if they are still covered in bubbles

1. No outlets in the bathroom

Rather not need to take the vacuum out or need an extension cord to blow dry my hair in the bathroom or to charge my toothbrush.

1. English Breakfast/fry up

Too greasy/fried for my taste and don’t understand the combination.. tomatoes, mushrooms, beans, fried bread, fried eggs black pudding, bacon, sausages etc.. how did this come about

1. Portions sizes

Constantly hear about how big American portion sizes are, but I see the same and even worse here, especially the takeaways

1. Closing hours

Makes no sense to me for things to shut at 17:30/18:00 if most people are working 9-5 pm

7.Soaps at night

1. Open 24 hours doesn’t actually mean 24 hours

Do love the portable card machines
Bank holidays
Tube timetables - minutes to next train
English countryside
Castles & Manor Houses
Cool unnatural hair colours
British Style
The Weather
Helpfulness especially in London
Sticky Toffee Pudding
The history
Accents

I'm a Yugoslav in England.

Vinegar on chips... why?!!?!

A good old British queue

Lack of bidets 😳

If you think a full English is bad try a glasgow fry - loads more all fried and more meat

According to "back in time for tea" it came about due to the holiday industry as a big breakfast for b&b's to serve when families started going on holidays in U.K. In (I think) the 1950's

I’m a Brit. Lived in South Africa for a few years. Could never get used to friends/colleagues turning up at my house uninvited. No phone call, no invite...no prior arrangement. Just turning up and expecting hospitality. I found it so rude but apparently it’s the norm.

Brit who used to live in Bermuda.
Buses.

• They didn’t pull away until everyone was seated.
• school kids got on after adults
• you get up once it stopped at your stop.
• EVERYONE says good morning to each other everytime someone gets on.

I loved it!

I’ve spent a lot of time in Rome. Strange things are:

• Drink driving. Jesus fuck, i couldn’t believe it. Not one over the limit but properly clattered and we have no other way of getting home.
• Vests. Never go out without one, you could catch a chill. In August
• wet hair. Never go out with, people will think you are a scarlet woman
• man child is the default. If mamma isn’t still taking care of him, Nona will be
• the strange Venn diagram of the male mind whereby their love fits into the intersection of veneration of overachieving women, mammas and cute bits to shag. Italian sexual politics is where angels fear to tread.

However all this pales next to a friendly Italian on a rush hour tube in London. He actually made eye contact and spoke to people. They ignored him as you would with any other nutter.

More Aus/NZ. The 'alternate drop' of plated food at events or weddings. For example. There are two food options chicken or fish. Waiting staff alternately place these in front of guests and then what follows is a huge discussion about whether you are happy with your dropped food or you need to find someone to swap with.
Only veggies or children are permitted to opt out of this mind boggling system.

I LOVE the sound of the buses in Bermuda, here in Scotland you take your life in your hands just getting to a seat before the driver zooms off! I'm very unsteady on my feet these days so tend not to use buses.

I'm British and grew up here, but I have lived in a few different countries and traveled a lot. The biggest culture shock has always being when returning here after a long period abroad. I seem to have no problem settling into life in another country, the problem has always been returning.

It's the smallness of everything, the grayness, the rain, people living very mundane lives, the unfriendliness, the lack of eye contact and interaction between people.

Britain does have some things going for it - good shops, arts, culture and museums, music, TV, countryside and proper chip shop chips with mayonnaise and cheese, to name a few.

Scot in Bavaria
Religion! There are statues of Jesus everywhere, people ask you about your religious views very quickly after meeting you, it was difficult for the school to comprehend that my kids had not been baptized and that I didn’t want them to have religion classes.
I’m completely used to the quirks of Germany now after nearly 10 years but it doesn’t stop me being homesick for the quirks of Scotland