I just paid £17 to have my passport photo taken and it is NOT MY FACE

[HarrietKettle]

I mean, I suppose it must be.

I look like I've just been arrested for drink driving offences, under the influence, and it's 4am in a downtown NY drunk-tank.

This is going on my ZSL pass for my charges and I to visit the zoo (I'm a nanny) so not ideal.

I applied make up. I brushed my hair. I wore a jaunty shade. I skipped along to Snappy-Fucking-Snaps on Charlotte Steet, London as I thought they'd take a nicer photo than my local one in Acton.

The lady asked me which one I wanted, they were all shite but one didn't make me want to cut my head off, I said that one please, she robbed me of my £17.99 and I said I'd pop back in half an hour.

I SWEAR TO GOD SHE SWITCHED THEM to the worst photo of my face I e ever seen. I look awful, I have never looked so awful, and if that is honestly my face I'm cancelling the extortionate wedding photographer we've selected and having my one year old nephew take the pics, at least he's likely to chop out my head.

I now have to present a picture of me looking like a criminal with addiction problems to my new boss for the ZSL card, and I'll have 7 monstrosities left that will never see the light of any day.

I looked fine in the mirror beforehand. Fine.

My fiancé says I'm like a slightly less Chanel-ed version of Natalie Portman (we've had his eyes tested and they're grand but I know he's slightly biased) so WHAT THE FUCK happened. The image is seared on to my brain forever. And the godforsaken ZSL card.

Anyone else look shite when they thought they looked ok?

DISCLAIMER LIGHTHEARTED I know I'm lucky to have a face etc etc

For some reason I am all forehead in mine - a female Sven Goran Eriksson (not a good look - considering the rest of my look is generally a bit Professor Sprout from Harry Potter)

Mine also looks like a mugshot. Either DUI or shoplifting in Greggs.

Criminal potato

Slightly off topic but until I saw this thread had no idea snappy snaps was still going! Don’t think there are many where I am in the West Midlands.

When they took DS's, he was so pale, they insisted on darkening the picture digitally to give him a tan!

I on the other hand always look like I'm either half asleep or smirking, and the least said about DP (or suspect number 3) the better.

DS2, for some reason, looks awesome in his (not his first one.. in that he's a grumpy, suspicious looking sullen thing). Only person in the whole family who has a good pic.

Dd took my passport photo on my iPod
It didn't cost me anything

My passport looks like I just did a long stretch in Holloway, my DS’s first one made him look like a football with a face painted on.

I am round faced and always look like I have about 50 extra chins. I take comfort in the fact that even my provisonal licence photo makes me look like a fat old man, and I weighed about 8 stone back then.

Speaking of bad photos, someone tagged me in an FB pic the other day at a side angle. The side! I can’t think of anything more horrible to do to a person.

Dh pic on the other hand screams axe murderer.

My passport pic is honestly the worst pic I ever took in my life. It does, however, accurately look like me after crossing 8 time zones.

Oh, OP - thank goodness wedding photographers have more skill than your average Passport Photo taker!!

DS needed his passport renewing and I couldn't bare the thought of taking him to get it done so I used a passport photo app - still fairly awful as no smiling, no glasses etc but at least i could take as many as I wanted and choose the best! (And it only cost £4 to get them printed and delivered) 😆😆

Really, in order to judge, you are going to have to upload it

17 quid , our lovely local photographer charges a fiver for a set of 4, cheaper than a booth

Awful isn't it. Why does the camera see something so different to the mirror!

£17.99???

but at I know I'm lucky to have a face etc etc

But they just take your photo when you get to the zoo for the card though.

I was told one couldn't smile on DL photos. So I didn't. I look awful, dh said do another. I said it didn't matter.

It does

I hear you OP.

I'm gorgeous in RL, but my passport photo says ugly

My children look gorgeous in theirs though, so they must have just messed mine up

I got all dolled up yesterday to go for lunch - not bad at all , if I say so myself. Until ... I went to take a photo of the cat but the bloody camera was in selfie mode , I looked horrific !!! As though someone had drawn on my face with a sharpie , only they weren't sharpie lines but wrinkles !

My passport photo's lighting is all odd , there must have been a light shining directly above my head , it looks like I'm bald on top , like the bloke in the wheelchair from Little Britain.

God, this is brilliant. Loving the replies.

Hahaha cremefresh that made me laugh

You could have done it yourself on your phone, I didn’t as there was no suitable background at home and I would rather pay a fiver than faff about ironing a sheet and pinning it to the wall and trying to get it right

My new passport photo last year made me look exhausted and confused - which I thought was pretty much like I look after a long haul flight so at least my face and the photo would match for passport control. My previous photo was 10 years old and was one of the most flattering images of me ever and it was getting a bit embarrassing when the passport officers would squint slightly disbelievingly at the glamour puss in the photo and the more prosaic me standing there.

My passport photo is shocking.

I look like Nick Ross should be telling people to keep an eye out for me and phone Crimewatch but do not approach me under any circumstances.

Then the fuckers go and use the same photo when I renewed my driving license. Every time I have to show ID to collect a parcel I wonder if they're going to call Crimestoppers...

They're changing the ZSL membership over from the previous (very long serving) nanny and apparently I need to send an update form for the details and pic. WHY didn't I go to a booth or use a bloody app?! Might as well have pissed on 17.99 and burnt it.

I better feel like it's worth it when I watch a bleeding sloth eat a banana or whatever they have there.

Ok you're all cheering me up though

I have brown eyes on my passport photo, and blue eyes in real life. I have no idea how that happened.